Crawling, Slowly, Out of a Very Deep Hole

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Still pretty sick. It's driving me crazy, my productivity is still in the trash, and considering how ill I remain, I've still done a lot of stuff; it's kind of annoying to be honest. I'm lonely and unemployed, but the world is still knocking on my door most insistently.

In my illness I started reading fan fiction- it's been a long time! I used to read some Sailor Moon fan fiction back in the day, and now it's Gossip Girl. With the clothes, and Chuck, and Blair, and the fact that it's my go to comfort show at this point, it's not really a surprise. Reading the stories made me feel more alive, which is nice considering how sore my throat is and that I cannot breathe out of my nose.

Sleep has been miserable. I didn't take a nap today, but I also didn't get out of bed until 10:45 X_X But that is also because I don't fall asleep before 1AM, which is also due to the naps, which is due to sleeping poorly. A vicious cycle. So no nap today. Now I'm quite sleepy at 8PM however, ugh. I'm not sure how I'm really going to fix such a miserable sleep pattern. And I have a meeting at 8AM on Monday, ha!

Things I've done in spite of illness: family dinner Christmas Eve, Christmas movie with Mom and Nick. Entertained a dear friend for a few hours- including playing Just Dance. Kept my husband happy *ahem* answered e-mails, had a faux phone interview for an hour and forty minutes, was interviewed for an article with the LA Times, volunteered with JASCO, met the head of HR for International Affairs at OSU. So many things, some of them cool, and I just feel depressed. I'm sick and tired (literally) and while I feel like change is just around the corner, I can't help but wonder what more it will take to get a decent job?

I'm sure I've put on some weight. If anyone else was sick this long, they would have lost a dress size, but not me. And what can I do? I'm hardly going to go to the gym when I'm snotting everywhere and coughing all the time. Today I at least at fairly well and drank a lot of water. Oh, I forgot my vitamins, I knew there was something.....I did get my hair cut, at last. It's super cute, I'm just not any good at styling it yet. But it's darker with a few caramel highlights, shorter, above my shoulders a bit with a few layers. It made me happy for awhile, but I'm feeling down again. That interview for the article today was super cool and it doesn't make a jolt of different to anyone. Out of every Facebook status I've ever had, you think people would find that awesome, ugh.

One last thing. I'm getting ready to write a guest blog for a friend, and I'm going to write about manners and etiquette. Anyone have any questions or issues I can answer for you? Let me know, it'd make me happy to help.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I know how you feel about the weight gain thing. I always put on weight when sick too, cause everything in my body tells me that food is NECESSARY for recovery. Mind you, starvation is never the things that I need to recover from... Being sick usually adds 3-4 kg to my weight in a week:-(

    But, hey, all this CAN be lost again! I'm sure if you get back to the gym, the weight will shift in the right direction!

    Congrats on the interview for the newspaper! What was it about?

    3508 days ago
    Sounds like a trip to the doc or urgent care is in order. My entire house has been sick with flu, cold, sinus infections, bronchitis, etc. Plenty of antibiotics have us on the mend, but it's been a slow progress.

    Have a great start to 2011!
    3508 days ago
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