Nothing to do with Weight Loss or Fitness (well maybe Mental)
Friday, September 24, 2010
I have a peeve. It may be my own personal issue, but it bothers me. As you may or may not know, my husband and I have gone through some really rough financial times for the past five years. He has been laid off three times, quit one job and I have been laid off once. I am the primary breadwinner (income 2-3X his), but still his hurt our household. This was after him paying off a VERY expensive divorce that netted him nothing but a black hole of debt. and the IRS reamed us for getting married. (Lost my head of household at the end of the year after deducting with that in mind all year, yes bad planning on my part, but never even THOUGHT of it because I mean they keep telling you marriage is a good thing for taxes... NOT). Anyhoo, the past two years have been VERY, very bad. Running negative in the account, getting to the point that the cupboard has peanut butter, some rice and a few noodles... (I would starve as I despise peanut butter). Getting utilities cut off, crying with bill collectors, trying not to lose the two vehicles we have and thinking about selling our house, although we can't afford to fix the damage the dog has caused, which means we would sell it for less and make less (if any) and etc, etc. So that's my past four to five year history.
Anyway, I have friends and I do LOVE them to death, but they can just rub me the wrong way sometimes. You may be this person, you may know this person, but..... the ones that oh, I don't have any money, or I'm so broke, etc. or oh my wife's business hasn't taken off, I can barely cover our bills, but I just told you how I was golfing (not a cheap sport) with my daughter at LEAST once a week and we just came back from a week in Arkansas with golfing every day, and a few months ago Colorado. But yeah, I can't cover my bills. REALLY????? I really don't want to hear that out of your mouth. You can't cover your bills because you don't cut anything out... you still get vacations and you GOLF for Pete's sake. Don't tell me your freaking broke. Bite my big white A&&.... (Sorry.. on a tangent there) and this person has a six figure income, which i know broke is relative to the amount of money you make, but puhleeze/????? and his wife has the same when her business IS going. We don't even break six figures when we have BOTH of us working.
and the other friend, oh, I'm so broke, just can't afford anything. But takes two one week vacations (one with the extended family and one with the new hubby) and always somewhere nice.. oh wait the last one was a full week at Disney World, last year Hawaii. Just bought a brand new $50K SUV. oh and a week after making this statement sends a picture... look at the dining room table I just bought... seats 12 and not bought at the thrift store.
Or, I"m so broke. but I just spent a weekend in NYC and went to a show and blah, blah, blah. Do you get the point?
DO YOU REALLY KNOW WHAT BEING POOR or BROKE is? It's constant overdrafts or returned checks because you can't pay your mortgage or car payment or your electricity. It's an empty pantry. It's NOT having been on a vacation since you got married five years ago and the only reason you got to do that one was because there was an unexpected windfall. It's never eating out unless you accidentlaly get a two for one coupon or someone gives you something free. It's the electricity getting turned off and they don't turn it back on for 24 hours and you have to spend the night at the neighbors because you can't get ready for work. It's telling your 20 year old daughter that she has to work her A&& off to pay her tuition because you can't afford to help her, but oh yeah you still have to make decent grades because you're trying to get in dental school. Do you have any idea how that hurts a mother to have to see her daughter go through that? Or totally NOT having anything for Christmas under the tree. We've now gone through two years of that. It's painful and it hurts because Christmas used to be my favorite time of year. I love to give. I can't even afford to buy stuff to make stuff that's how bad it was. I sold gold last year to buy my stepdaughter a present and she's the only one who got anything because she was 9. and you really want to tell me how poor you are? Puhleeze.
It's sleepless nights wondering who is calling you on your phone. It's a credit score totally in the toilet because you can't fix it yet because you are barely keeping afloat.
So, unless you're really broke... think before you speak about how broke you are. Think about what you have and what you could give up if something really happened. Especially if you are in the company of people who actually are struggling.
and I know there are people MUCH worse than me. I'm middle class, I know that. But I've been through the struggles of the poverty stricken. I haven't been homeless yet, but we were getting there a couple of years ago.
Anyway, that's my rant of the week. Little tired cranky right now. Adjusting to the hubby's new work schedule and it's a little rough because we have some bad start nights. Anyway, it's Friday. Yay.