Wednesday, September 08, 2010
Bleh, I feel like I am in a fog. I have no energy, no motivation to get anything done, no desire to move forward. Funny enough, I am having plenty of anxiety about a number of different topics. Hmmmm, connection perhaps?
I know what has triggered all this - the change in the weather. It's as if two weeks ago, a switch was flipped to fall and my energy switched off. I've known for the past two years that I probably have Seasonal Affective Disorder and it is definitely being proven to me right now.
A bright spot is that I had my annual physical with my MD yesterday and we talked about this. I already have done a ton of research on this problem and counseled a few of my own patients about it. We both agreed that since we're planning on trying to get pregnant soon, taking antidepressants isn't a good option (and not one I want to explore anyway). So we agreed on trying light therapy and she wrote me a prescription for a light box. Hopefully the insurance will help pay for it, but that remains ambiguous from the benefits guide I have. I need to get started on some kind of therapy pronto because I cannot function like this.
No big surprise either that in the past few days, my eating at night has been out of control. This is classic SAD symptomology, even if it is totally frustrating.
I was so happy last week to see 149 on the scale. I know I can get back there and push past it, but with how I'm feeling right now, its going to take a lot of effort to accomplish that. I know I can do it - just have to keep going. *sigh* Is is time to crawl under the desk for a nap yet?