LINDSAY315

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I shouldnt complain...But I'm going to a little...

Friday, September 03, 2010

Well before the complaints I do wanna say I am very proud of myself for now losing 21lbs since the end of July (249. That puts me into the 240's!I cant believe its actually happening. Its so crazy that the self control came out of no where. Ive done so good, I amaze myself in sticky situations. I also find it crazy how in just a little over a month how much my stomach has shrunk. I get full SO easily now. I LOVE IT lol.

What I hate is how I look in the mirror and look like the same girl who started off on this website at 270lbs. Why must so many of us have that "fat girl mentality". Why must we continue to see ourselves as our "big" selves when we are continuing to lose weight. Ive have plenty of people tell me they can see the difference - I just wish I could. I do know watching the numbers on the scale go down makes me feel good. Also, fitting more comfortable into some of my clothes...not feeling like my stomach is bulging out or that my jeans are too tight makes me feel better too. OH! And I moved my the clips on my bra from the very last row..in once to the middle row. That made me feel better.

I started actually working (no more training) this week. Im at dunkin donuts for now because I didnt have a job for just about 4 months. I went to school for medical office administration. At some point id like to find a decently paying job doing that but this will settle for now, anything is better then depending on the state and I hated not being independent. Anyways off subject. Im on my feet everyday now from 6:30 a.m - 10:30 am..I dont get a break because it is only a 4 hour shift. Everytime I come home in such pain. My back, legs, ankles and feet hurt SO much. Today its my lower back the most. I have like SHOOTING pains in my lower back. I hope I start getting used to it because Ive had to come home everyday and take medicine. I hate being at work and being in so much pain the whole time.

Thats it for now! I gutta figure out dinner for Gabby and I.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SHAUNDRA825
    I deal with the same thing in the mirror. I have lost 85 lbs and I feel like I see the same thing in the mirror that I saw at 300+ lbs. The only way I see a difference is in photos so I try to take as many as I can!
    3677 days ago
  • SKINNYMISSKASEY
    About standing on your feet - yes you will get use to it. I've worked 9hr shifts through high school, some college, and now after college at my father's store (we have no breaks, and rarely sit much because we walk a lot back and forth) - and stand on cement floors. I've had MANY nights where my ankles hurt so bad. Or my back. They don't anymore thankfully. My back does though sometimes. BUT.. I have small veins that have popped out in a few spots on my legs. I would love to get 4hr shifts. Sometimes I have 12hr or 13hr depending. It's tough!
    3678 days ago
  • DEBI1396
    Look into a good pair of shoes or sneakers.. You want good support being on your feet like that.. Take it from someone who is on there feet alot.. I invested in some good sneakers and a pair of the shoes the nurses wear best investment ever.. So something to consider.
    Great job on the weight loss so far. Keep up the great work..
    :)
    3678 days ago
  • LINDALEE14
    I'm sorry about the job situation. I hope that it can improve for you soon.

    You have really done so well and there are so many signs that say that you have really lost a significant amount of weight. Like WCLOVEIT said, I would stop looking in the mirror so much. In fact, all of her ideas were really excellent.

    I too think it's a head thing. When your mind tries to sabotage you, just tell yourself that it's a lie and you don't believe it. After awhile, you'll stop believing it for real.

    I think sometimes we do need to complain and that's okay. That being said, I would like to congratulate you on your accomplishment, which is no small thing.
    emoticon
    3678 days ago
  • WCLOVEIT
    Hi Lindsay. I totally understand the mirror thing.18 years ago, I took off 80 pounds. It took 5 years before I could see myself as smaller than I was. Its totally normal, and we all go through it. It is our minds that do it to us. The way I dealt with it, was I stopped looking in the mirror so much, and took a whole lot more stock in the other signs you mentioned. Even if I was broke, I would go into a shop, and on purpose take in a size smaller to the dressing room, and try it on. Even if it was still tight, but I got it on, did tons more for me than that horrid trip to the mirror. Stick with it, believe people when they tell you, its working. Don't let your mind sabotage what you have worked so hard for.
    3678 days ago
  • DSD110
    I feel for you. Hopefully you will find the job you want soon.
    3678 days ago
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