I feel like cr@p
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
It's hot outside. My AC isn't working, and in this heat, the fan in my bedroom doesn't do crap. I don't have time or energy to fix the AC because my roommate is out and I'm stuck at work doing stuff I hate, because it's boring and slow here in August, so it feels like busy work.
I'm not sleeping well because of the heat and stress. And this leads me to not eat as well, which makes me even sleepier and crankier. I sooo wanted to wake up early today while it was cool in order to workout, but I couldn't, since I didn't fall asleep until close to 1 a.m.
I'm feeling very frustrated.
I haven't weighed myself in a few days, because I'm not going to like what I will see. I feel fat.
I know that I've gotten stronger since beginning Spark People, but I laid out pretty modest, slow and steady weightloss goals, with dates I kept pushing back. I had hoped to have lost at least a few pounds by Rosh Hashanah, which is now in about 3 weeks. I think at this point I'll be lucky if I have netted losing 1.
I can't concentrate at work today. But if I wasn't here, I don't know what I'd want to be doing - okay, fine, besides diving headfirst into an ice cream sundae. I am drinking crazy amounts of water, it's not even worth tracking.
Where did my willpower go? I don't feel like doing anything besides sleep, and when I can sleep, I can't!
One thing is for sure, I'm returning to the OA meeting on Friday.