Funky Monday. But Inspiration Always Comes.

Monday, August 02, 2010

Had another funky Monday today. Not manic like last time (thank God, lol), but funky.

My spirit is low, my heart is heavy. All day was just a struggle to keep going. I biked on Friday, and had a blast, and then, boom, it's back to work again. The grind. It gets to me every now and then. (sigh) Ah well! Que sera sera.

So contrary to what I would have done a year ago, grab some Chips Ahoy and Cheezits and park it in front of some TV, I decided that I had to get my body active and going. So all day, I'm thinking. What to do, what to do?

Finally I decided to get back on the bike. I had such a great time Friday, maybe I'm still in the spirit. So I ate my lunch at my desk. Then during my lunch break, I used the whole time to hightail it back home (I live closeby) and sneak in a quick bike ride around the block. 15 minutes in motion. 150 cals burned.

I felt better! Not great, but better.

I return from lunch and I'm back at my desk, still just chugging, chugging, chugging on the job. Unhappy. So as soon as 5pm hits. I decide I need another go. And so I do. I drive back home, grab my bike, hog it in the car and drive. But this time, I don't know where I'm going (laughing). Funny right? I know I need to "go", but I don't know "where I'm going"... lol... I just felt I would listen to my spirit.

Along the way I put on some Pavarotti (yes, I love me some opera - Pav, Bocelli and Domingo are my loves) and bought myself some flowers, you know from those roadside vendors. Deep fuschia roses. The stoplight is red so I can just smell them for a minute... (because, yes you have to stop and smell the roses sometimes, I kid you not).

Miracle of miracles, again, I felt better.

Finally I arrive at my destination. Mind you I didn't know where I was going (lol), but somehow, en route, I had decided. I decided to go to the local county park. It's huge with tons of bike trails and pavilions and open space wrapped around this great canal system. Plus it had just rained so the air smelled sweet of dew. It was great. I got out the car and onto my bike and cruised around just drinking in the scent and sites of nature. 20 minutes in motion. 220 cals burned.

Yes, that was exactly what I had needed. I felt even better now. Almost a hundred percent.

Back home I put my roses in some water. I eat. I can feel though, that I'm still a little down trodden. I don't like it, but I at least did something today, right? But, wrong. Because then, why do I still feel this?

I force myself not to work and just sit down and relax. Where does that always take me? Online, to SparkPeople (laughing). So I'm looking through my SP friends pages and then come across a new page, ASHLEYEH22. I love her page and spunk and dedication, so I friend her. Then something on her page caught my eye. It's a Spark poster.

The woman in it looks so fierce. Like the woman I want to be. Then I read the message, and BOOM. I'm inspired.

I'm inspired to get my butt up and squash this sadness. I biked twice today and it didn't get the job done. So you know what? The job wasn't finished. I have to be dedicated to healing my mind and healing my body, no excuses. So now I'm out the door to RUN off this sadness and burn some calories. And when I get back in and wash the sweat and tears off under the shower, it will be finished. And I'll be back to my old, April self.

It's just so funny how inspiration just comes in the blink of an eye, just like that. And I will be dedicated to feeling better.

Thanks SP, thanks SP friends, and thanks ASHLEYEH22.

P.S. Aren't my roses lovely? Every time I look at them, I smile. And if you're having a bad day today...they're your roses too.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You are awesome. The roses are cool as well.

    I sooo needed this - the job is not done part - I felt that yesterday but didn't make the connection you did -

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    3652 days ago
    thanks be to God that the funky mood was busted. We all need to smell the roses more often. emoticon
    3653 days ago
    Glad to see you make it through the day. You went deep and pulled out that inner strength! That is what I am talking about! That is a nice quote, too! I just talked about excuses in my blog. You should definitely check it out. With that, we are only accepting results! LET'S GET IT!!!
    3654 days ago
  • CAROLX914
    I too had a moody monday and it is now tuesday and it seems like its still there. As I was reading your blog, I smiled because I totally dig where you are coming from.

    thank you
    3655 days ago
  • no profile photo CD5483846
    i love the quote. interest vs commitment. love love love it! it makes all the difference. thanks for sharing. :D i am committed to have a healthy lifestyle. there are times when i fear change. you know, going into relationships, going back to school, etc. even if it's for the better, it makes me nervous because i want to stay healthy (i am happy with where i am right now and if change comes, will i still be able to remain healthy?) but if we are committed to being healthy, no matter what comes our way, we work with it and can still be healthy. i just need to straighten my mind. :D and the roses are lovely. :)

    glad you're feeling better
    3655 days ago
    emoticon Love the quote! I often share something similar with my groups at church. Interest vs commitment: it truly makes a difference. Great blog. Feel better soon.

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    3655 days ago
    April, I've got a relaxation tape which says, at one point, to imagine the scent of roses. I could never do it - lemons, yes, but not roses :( But when I look at the picture of your roses, I really CAN smell them! Such good news to hear that after you enlisted the support of your trusty bike, you were able to blow the Monday blues right out of the water - YEAH!!! Lots of calories and lots of physical effort, but you're living proof that vigorous exercise can really get the endorphins going...and the mood boosted! Congratulations!!! When you added Pavarotti to the mix - WOW, that's heady stuff!! Keep bringing us tales of your ongoing successes, April. You are AMAZING!! emoticon - Sandi emoticon
    3655 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6096849
    Love the roses and how they're sitting in a little simple glass surrounded by fruit. Thanks for sharing the roses, that's super sweet of you. I get into these Monday moods too. It was such a struggle just to get through today. But I kept telling myself "Just do such and such and you'll be done." And that was the way it was. Keep on keeping on girlfriend. Listen to your body and do what makes you feel good. And just think, you won't have to see another Monday for six whole days. yay! xoxo
    3655 days ago
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