TKAYSMILES

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I'm back!!!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Ok, here's the warning...this could get long and drawn out and not always related to my food journey. But need to vent some stuff and so here is where I'm doing that!!!!

My vacation was for the most part wonderful. We visited with my half sister and her mother first. What is so awesome is my sister is recovering from breast cancer. She had her last chemo last month. She is very young so this was a shock. But she is so amazing!! Her mother is pretty cool too. They knew that I was on a healthy eating journey. So they made sure that there was food for me to eat. They took us to one restaurant where it was mostly health food and salads. It was yummy!! Then instead of going out to dinner, they bought healthy food for dinner and breakfast to accommodate me. It was awesome really!!! We also went hiking in the mountains. It was just an awesome day!!!

Unfortunately we didn't get to spend much time with them. We were on to the other side of the state to spend time with my mother's family. Things actually started off pretty good. We don't have a large family but we all get along pretty well. There were 2 reasons we all got together this year. One was for my grandmother's memorial service. She passed away in November and you just don't have memorials too often in Wyo in November. Plus where she wanted to be was impossible to get to in the winter. Hence the memorial now. Plus we have a large party with my aunt and uncle's friends at their property where we fish and camp and rough it for a few days. So the memorial went really well. It was very nice. The food was awesome, but fattening!! I have to say I didn't watch my diet too much at all. I ate what was there. But probably not as much as I would have before and only once did I have a desert. So I did do better then I would have done otherwise.

Ok, so Thursday we had the memorial and then as a fun event we had a memorial pinochle tournament. (my family takes this card game very seriously)!!! But it was all fun!!! I didn't win but that was all ok! We went camping Friday-Sunday. Weather, not so great...kind of rainy, but not really cold and not windy so that was good. Again the food....amazing!!! But I think I did pretty well over all! I did drink quite a bit through the weekend too!!! Which I don't do all the time so allowed myself this one time.

But here's where it gets fun. (not really)!! My mom now lives close to my sister and her husband. I knew they hadn't been treating her too well before we went, but she always begged me not to say anything cause it would make it worse with her and her ability to see my niece who she adores!! Well they were down right ugly to my mom this weekend. They also brought a friend that no one liked and that was lazy and rude to everyone. So the weekend goes by, my sister and family are not getting along with many. The rest of us were just going to be quiet about it until after the trip so that there were no problems. But it got harder and harder and harder. Until Sunday afternoon and all hell broke loose. There was yelling, cussing, threats.....my mom will never be allowed to see their daughter again and not allowed to go to their house again. I am sure I am included in this too. Honestly it is not bothering me for me. I don't get along with them much as it is but now will never speak to her until her husband and friend apologize to my mother and my family. She doesn't see that they are in the wrong so you can see it will go round and round. Needless to say it put a small damper on our vacation!!! The sad part is my mom is a really really good grandmother. she would give her life for her grandkids and actually has given up more then she should have to for them. I am planning on writing my sister a very long and detailed letter with everything that I have wanted to say to her in the past but didn't for my mom's sake. I'm trying to wait a few days too so I don't write it in anger. It probably won't matter, they don't care, but hopefully it will finally make me feel better about some things. (and you know we think it stemmed from the tournament that was supposed to be fun) So needless to say I am now a sister and a brother in law and a niece shorter in my family. I hope someday that they do apologize and want to be part of the family again. It will be really sad for them if they don't. I'm actually feeling better about it all then I have in a really long time. I'm excited to finally get to say my peace. I am trying not to do it in anger though cause that would just make me the bad guy. I'm going to be rational and articulate in my letter to her. It might take me a while to do it though, cause right now I'm irate...LOL!

Btu through all of that...I got home, after driving in a blizzard....and only gained 1.2 pounds. I did try to walk alot, but it was so rainy it was hard. But was super happy that the weight gain wasn't 10 pounds cause that is what I felt I had gained. My stomach did not like the food I was putting in it for most of the weekend. I had to eat tumms all weekend when I haven't had them for months! But people were so impressed with my weight loss and my non smoking!! That was awesome! I only had a small minute after the blowout where I thought I could have smoked. But then what would that help, NOTHING!! So I didn't! Very proud of myself too!! I know this is a very long blog, but had to start getting some stuff out. I missed all my friends and missed sparkpeople alot while I was gone!!! Glad to be home, although it is freaking hot here!!!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RUBIA_LIZ
    The BEST thing in this blog is that you did not turn to smoking during your frustrating situation!! That is just awesome. And yes, it's sad how people are sometimes - but I'll bet that in the end, they'll realize how great a grandmother your mom is and reconsider all the ridiculous stuff they said. Good for you for waiting until your calm to have your say!!
    3314 days ago
  • MS_MAE00
    Hey. You can always adopt us ......except you would end up with two neices instead of one :) Hopefully next year the girls will be bigger and then i can hang out instead of being "mom" all weekend!!
    3314 days ago
  • TKAYSMILES
    Thank you all for your support!! I haven't really started the letter yet cause I am still in that angry want to kick your butt stage. So I'm going to calm down some and try to write it rationally. Part of the problem is they are PHD's in Chemistry so they look down on the rest of the little people. Anyway, my stomach is much better now too since eating better. It was the food and not the stress cause it started before all the BS did. Something about greasy cheesy enchiladas started it!!! But I did get in some walking so that was good too!
    3316 days ago
  • PEWTERBUNNY
    Welcome back! I guess we went on vacay together. I didn't go to visit family hence mine was fun filled. I've had plenty of the other kinds of family/strife filled holidays. You have to speak your truth and get it out. I did that with my sister and guess what was randomly in my email when I got back today. An apology!! Wow! Of course I know not to expect her to change and she probably wants something but it is nice to get a complete apology. Hopefully you will get one too.
    3316 days ago
  • SISTERDOE
    Welcome back!

    You really have something to look back on any time an urge comes on to smoke. Look what you got through without a single puff!

    Keep the quit!

    Gentle hugs,
    Dotti
    emoticon
    3317 days ago
  • no profile photo TRABOLD8567
    Congrats on not smoking despite all the stress. Sorry you had to go thru all that on your vacation. At least you didn't eat or smoke away your bad feelings. The letter will do you a lot of good; get all those toxic feelings out.

    Welcome back! We missed you!!
    3317 days ago
  • SHAKTI_ANGELIKA
    I am glad you are back - I am sorry about the family blowout, but it kinda goes with the territory, when you go visiting, doesn't it? . It's good you are not dashing off a letter in anger - that is never helpful.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3317 days ago
  • MBSKIT
    I'm glad that you had a good time on vacation.
    I'm sorry to hear about your sister and her family. The only people she is hurting is your mother and her daughter. That is really sad.
    I'm glad that you are goignt o say your peace. Do you think the tummy troubles were the food and not the stress?

    3317 days ago
  • RONIE11
    I'm glad your back.. I missed seeing you in my friends list, thats the first thing I go to then I go to my teams..I'm sorry that you had an out with your sis.. My sis and I have had our outs too but they are short.. although at the time they seem to go on forever. One time I tried to have my mom on my side.. smart lady didn't take sides.. We worked it out.. mostly we just let each other be ourselves and have peace with that.
    It sounds like you had a real nice vacation in spite of the chaos. I hope your mom will be ok until she can start seeing her granddaughter again.. being a Nana I know how hard it can be.
    Congrats!!!!! on only gaining 1.5 pounds.. Thats amazing.. I know I would gain more than that.. I gain more than that over a weekend getaway...lol
    take care my friend and welcome back...
    3317 days ago
  • MOM2PACO
    Wow sounds like you had a mixed pack of feelings vacay lol. I am glad that you have decided to write when you are calmer and the anger has kind of blown over. Its really your sisters lose and its too bad for your Mom cause she misses out on her grandchild, and thats sad. My Mom passed away and thats why I know life is too short and when you have a good family, know it, acknowledge it and love it. If they are a crappy family, leave it quick because you can choose others to be in your family that bring good. I splurged over the weekend as well...we all do it, now its time to snap back into reality! I am glad you had a great time except for the small (or large) blip with your sister and her family! Its really sad, but maybe your letter will cure it. Good job for NOT smoking!! I am so proud of you! Keep on truckin'!!
    3317 days ago
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