My Husband Cracks Me Up (NC-17) AND BIRDIE STORY!!!!!

Friday, June 04, 2010

1. A couple of days ago, I munched a few handfuls of almonds for snacks. Unfortunately for me, the consequence was a sore heiny the next day, if you get my drift. I complained to my husband, who said, "Oh, my poor baby! I'm sorry you have splinters in your trumpet!"

OMG, I nearly kilt myself laughing. And, yes, I'm quite the musician, I tell you!

2. I was feeling pretty happy today - I sold some stuff out of our garage that we certainly didn't need, and I got two hundred bucks! I told him, you know, 'finding' money makes me feel 'frisky.' He offered to leave a trail of ones and cheese and crackers up the stairs...

[let me add that these were items he thought I should give to GoodWill or GotJunk - and I told him they were WORTH MONEY - HA!]

3. I remarked to him tonight that I hadn't weighed myself since before we went to Atlanta. I had several weeks where I wasn't feeling well afterward. First, I got a horrendous sinus infection, and the aftermath of the antibiotics on my gut nearly kilt me. Also, I've been going through a steadily changing course of blood pressure medications - the side effect of one was making me feel horribly lethargic for nearly two weeks. All I wanted to do was sleep or read and watch movies on the couch.

I figured, the goal of Spark is to change LIFESTYLE, without the emphasis on DIET. I want to be healthier, not just SKINNY. BE PATIENT. Get healthy first.

One of the problems I've had over that last few weeks is that if I start coughing - which is usually in the morning, because of the residual effects of the damned sinus infection, I start gagging. And then I'm over the sink.

So tonight I said, "I'm at the same weight loss I was at before I quit weighing!!!"

He said, "Wow, all that puking is paying off!"

I said, "Hey, that's in the morning, and it's just dry heaves!" (Maybe I'm pregnant, El Seabee?)

And he said, "Well, then, you need to make your puking more productive."

I told Parker to bite him on the ass, since he was over the sink brushing his teeth at the time.

I have to say, despite our absolutely MISERABLE weather, I had the most energy today that I've had in ages. I've been active every day, and, uh, I ate the most pornographically HUGE steak two days ago...


After the sad demise of our robin grand-chicks, we have bird news.

The last few days, we have had a Western Bluebird flying around like mad outside my lair window, which is above the front porch.

Tonight, I spied a birdie in the Ye Olde Nest.

Reasonably sure it's a Western Bluebird - you can't see the wings in this photo, of course, but I've seen them flying around and you can't miss the blue wings.

They're a 'cavity dweller' - and of course, we've stolen their cavities. :(

But the birdie seems to be happy sitting on the old robin nest, even though some shet-bird of a human was out taking flash pictures.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • BANAN2
    Hi! I always enjoy your comments on Cheri's blogs, so I thought I'd check you out! Great blogs, great spirit, great "poser" dogs LOL, and your husband has the same talent of witty remarks to brighten the day that mine does... that's why, in spite of his annoying man tendencies, I've stuck with him since we met in 1972. He is still making me laugh. I'm adding you as a friend, even though we're strangers! I Want to read more!
    3204 days ago
    I can't remember for sure but I think my dad was on a blood pressure medication that made him cough. We were all freaking out at the time because he was a smoker and we thought the worst. It turned out it was just his medication. It might be worth talking to your physician about the cough and confirming it is sinus related and not medication related.

    Oh, and as it turns out, my Dad *did* end up with lung cancer but several years later (and throat cancer too but that's a different story). He had surgery and is now free of both throat and lung cancer.
    3241 days ago
    emoticon as usual !
    3242 days ago
    "All that puking is paying off" That's a keeper.
    3243 days ago
    You always make me smile.

    Congrats on the decluttering, the baby birds, and the goal of healthy lifestyle overshadowing just weight loss.

    Sorry you are still suffering from the sinus issues. That can be miserable.

    Stella wants Parker to understand that recreational Tush Nipping is very gratifying and should be practiced at every possible opportunity.

    3244 days ago
    Hilarious! The weather has been the pits :( where is our spring sunshine! ?
    3245 days ago
    Thanks for the LOLs
    3245 days ago
    To me, humor is the spice of life - and you sure have a spicy DH!
    Stay positive,
    3245 days ago
    You are lucky to have found each other. You have a lot of laughter in your lives.
    3245 days ago
    Ummm....just don't let the cavity dwellers near your trumpet!
    3245 days ago
    Your Hubby can turn a funny phrase on a dime. emoticon
    3245 days ago
    Good blog - made me smile to start my day off rght!
    3245 days ago
    I love your blogs - always good for a morning laugh :) And yeah, I also love your phrases, such as the "splinters in your trumpet," and "pornographically huge steak" :D
    3245 days ago
    You've opened up a whole new vocabulary for me, Roob. I always thought that when you had 'cavity dwellers,' you needed to see your gynocologist pronto!
    3245 days ago
    I'm still giggling about the trumpet comment :) Thanks for the laugh - or thanks to your husband, sounds like you have a good one there!

    3245 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.