why am I different

Monday, May 24, 2010

I so very much want to let these feelings out. My emotions are so high. the hurt, anger, frustration. I rarely have time to myself. I don't want to appear selfish, but I need time to myself.
time to let these tears just flow. let my anger be released. but now is not the time.

will there ever be the right time?
Since Feb 19th, my life has turned inside. I have so many emotions that need to come out, but I have not had the proper time.I know how to get them out... by not taking my meds, it allows the bottled up feelings to come out. the slightest thing sets me into tears.

So many things I want to say.
I am NOT high maintenance, I may be high drama ...but that is it.

Paxil keeps the tears away. At this time I have no choice but to continue taking it.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • BEEBEE75
    It really helps emotionally to do just what you are doing. Writting down what you are feeling. So keep it up. And I hope you get to feeling better real soon. Also you aren't so much different than the rest of us. It is difficult trying to deal with living in this "old system". And we are all dealing with some problem and some are dealing with several problems.

    Betty emoticon
    3758 days ago

    Comment edited on: 12/28/2010 4:08:18 AM
    I want to thank you all for being there. Your words help keep me going.

    Soon I will let these feelings out.I do have a great counselor, saw him on Tuesday. I was able to let a few things out there so I am feeling better. As I figure things out and try to get it sorted and filed, it will get easier.
    3974 days ago
    Do what you need to do. But get your emotions out. Don't hold them in, they will just destroy you. I hope you can find someone or someway to find a release for it all. Praying for you.
    3975 days ago
    Find a good counselor, even a PA, and talk to them about better meds and counseling. It's worth a try. I know many whom have just been given a pill and the expectation that will fix things.
    Doesn't usually work well. There are also other meds out there.
    Throwing drugs at problems is not always the answer. Keep in touch, keep moving!
    3975 days ago
    I am so sorry that you are in such pain. I'm praying for you Precious. You have had tremendous losses in your life in recent months and life just keeps coming at you day in and day out. When you are ready, you'll get all your feelings out, and we will all be here to listen, to comfort, to encourage, to pray, and to share hope and friendship with you.

    With many, many hugs,
    Shannon~ emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3975 days ago
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