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Today's Daily Inspiration

Friday, April 23, 2010

Well, this started as a private journal entry, but thought it would make a good blog. Today's Daily Inspiration from Spark is entitled: The Wisdom of Listening. It says:

Wisdom has two parts: 1)-Having a lot to say. 2)-Not saying it. - Church billboard in Vermont

One common trait to nearly every good leader is the art of listening. Many times, the best leaders can be among the quietest in the room. They know their time is well spent in hearing new perspectives, ideas, and thoughts. It's how they grow personally and build visions. The wisest leaders know that hearing themselves talk is no way to build trust and goodwill. You can do the same thing. When a friend needs to talk, resist the urge to give advice right away and just listen. Ask questions, and really try to understand the answer. When a customer calls, don't say a word about your product until you fully know their needs. When your spouse is hurting, it's not the time to prove that you were right. Over time, you can develop that leader-like sense of when to open your mouth and when to keep it clamped firmly shut.

Spark People Daily Inspiration, April 23, 2010


I'm not sure any single "daily inspiration" that I've seen hits home for me quite as much as this one does.. I have become guilty of not listening, of liking the sound of my own voice a whole lot more than anyone else's. I don't know when I became such a boor..but I sit here and realize that I have.

I used to be an awesome listener..now I want to talk and solve before I even know what the problem is.

I resolve to do better with this. Because doing better with this will make me a better mother, wife, daughter, aunt, sister, cousin, niece, friend, boss, worker, coach, scout leader, board member, Christian, lawyer.. hmm, all the things I am, haven't thought about that either. But that is an entry for another day.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You.....not a good listener? I don't believe it for a second. I didn't know you "back then", but I know you now and I know you to be a good listener. I also know you to be a kind, gentle, thoughtful, faithful responder. Don't ever doubt yourself. We can only look forward and make ourselves better. That's not to say that we were bad in the past, just different.

    You are a wonderful person my friend, good listener, good responder, faithful Christian, and all around good person!

    Love you,

    3873 days ago
    Hey, Tina! I, too know what you mean (and Sonia may have a point)... I started listening to myself a while back and realized that while I was still listening to people more or less, my responses were different (jumping in to hurry the process along and start fixing 'it'), and I was speaking from my perspective rather than addressing that of whomever was talking. One of the things I like about the whole blog dynamic is that I find it slows me down, and reading the words reminds me how to really listen.

    In the process, I've also come to the conclusion that there are seasons in all areas of my life. Generally, I AM (as I believe you ARE) a better than average listener. However, sometimes I NEED to talk... for my own sake because I need to reinforce new realizations of my own (having an emotional/spiritual growth spurt)... or I am feeling a tad 'invisible' and I need to make myself a little more obvious... or I need to figure out something that is on my own mind (I need to talk to process... I believe this is why I've taken to blogging in a big way)... I am preoccupied with pressing concerns of my own (or I am TIRED)... or I am just plain impatient with hearing the 'same old, same old' (I no longer believe that just because someone is talking that I have to listen).

    I have noticed that as long as I am feeling calm and centered in myself, and I feel a real sense of balance in my life overall, I am as good a listener as I have ever been. When any of the above are in play, I struggle to really listen... and, honestly, the closer I get to 50 the less patient I am with anything that I feel is wasting my time... so in some circumstances, and with some relationships, I am no longer prepared to listen without boundaries... I no longer believe that listening is an obligation... some people aren't mine to whom I must listen.

    Another thing I've noticed lately, is that I will actually say to people, "I'm sorry, I just can't listen right now." Or I will say "I can't listen to this." (NOT like me at all) I am actually aware that I CAN'T always listen... so while I am not always being the best listener, I am also VERY aware of the importance of listening. "?"

    It seems that how able or not able I am to listen has become a barometer these days for how I am doing, and how well my own needs are being met... as Lynn says... food for thought.

    ...And just so you know, even at this place of being a self-proclaimed 'bad' listener, I think you are still a better listener than the average bear! I know I certainly feel heard.... and not just my words, but my heart, too. That's a treasure beyond price.

    {{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}

    P.S. Case in point... who left the longest response? (You twiggged my 'pondering' place with your blog)
    3873 days ago

    Comment edited on: 4/23/2010 8:41:56 PM
    Well, I have to say that I find you a great "listener", you remember what I "say" you respond thoughtfully and intellegently. May be you do more talking than you used to. (I didn't know you then.) May be you know yourself well enough to know you used to be "an even better" listener, but don't say you're not good.

    And, yeah, "what she said" that mom stuff makes us do "crazy many" things and our people won't wait for a thought out response, they want answers.

    I also have to say, that I am guilty of not listening as well as I used to either. food for thought

    3873 days ago
    Thank you for sharing! I've always been a good listener, but I do find that sometimes I don't want to listen. This is a great reminder. Thanks! Have a great Friday!
    3873 days ago
    Do you think the change from listener to non-listener happened after you became a mother? We end up multi-tasking so much that I believe this has become a mother's way of solving things quickly so we can move on to the next task at hand? Just a thought. So thank you for listening, lol.

    3873 days ago
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