Why have I been AWOL??

Saturday, March 20, 2010

**The following is a VERY embarrassing subject for me but I have decided to put it out there for information and hopefully to help someone else who may be going through what I have been**

Why have I been AWOL from Spark lately? I know some of you have missed me as I am getting questions and loving friends are asking where I am...well here is bear with me as I attempt to explain my absence..

I have not been feeling well for a long time. Several years as a matter of fact. And my being my bull headed self I always just figure this is my lot in life and I am to deal with it..that is all a normal process of aging.
"After all Joyce you ARE 54 now!"

So, I finally got really tired of not feeling good and dealing with the whole health "issue" that I have been dealing with. I went to the DR and had the "exam" , he then sent me to a specialist who did that whole "exam" thing. again ..then scheduled tests...and we did that whole "test" thing (and it was not nearly as embarrassing as I thought it would be) and then I find out that when your past 50 these DR's think you need a colonoscopy so he sent me that DR..where I tried my best to NOT throw a fit and be rude about that cause I did NOT want that done and did not want to even talk to him about that.
Well--yesterday the test results are back and I was back at DR #2 office for the decision. I am having surgery to correct the problem. I told him and the colon DR that they needed to co-ordinate their efforts because they were only getting this one "shot" at me so they better work together...well DARN IT..they are! I will be getting the colonoscopy and then the surgery all on the same day!
So..ok..we all need the colonoscopy after age 50 especially we women because colon cancer is the second leading cause of death in women over age 50...(they said)...still it does not make it an easy subject to discuss, talk about or even think about...but there it is.
Now for the surgical bladder pro-lapsed and I leak urine at the slightest thing and also have constant cramps and pain in my lower belly...
SO..this is NOT BECAUSE I AM OVERWEIGHT..the causes are many and varied such as..
Hereditary factors, giving birth to large babies, straining from lifting and carrying heavy items over your lifetime, weight can be a factor but not the only cause (so don't let a DR tell you that!!)
The mindset I had that this was somehow my fault for being FAT was all WRONG!
This was my kids and my momma's fault! LOL (I knew I could blame this on someone else!!) Oh and that 17 yrs of being a rural mail carrier did not help either!!
Anyway--ladies--DO NOT live with this..DO NOT think this is your "lot in life"...DO NOT be embarrassed to talk to your DR about this, have the tests done and then get it fixed! It is a pro-lapse. I have no muscle left to hold the bladder and urethra in place.
It is called hyper-mobile --insert really big word here--
Fancy language for no muscle left to hold things in place.
The procedure will be a small incision where they will place a "sling" inside from hip to hip and under the bladder to put it back into place and hold it there.
(they will also do that colonoscopy thing too :(
The DR said he wanted me to stay down and be "waited on" (HIS WORDS) for 3 to 4 weeks after that as doing to much will just make the surgery of no value...since I want this to work and be of value to me..I will be acquiring a bell to summon my husband at a moments notice to fluff my pillows and bring me treats...
Oh yes..I do so plan to be waited on...***insert an EVIL laugh here***

So--there it is..why I have been AWOL...why I have been so hesitant to talk about this to ANY ONE..and now..I hope and pray that since I have put myself out there and written this "embarrassing" blog that some how some way it helps someone else to not be embarrassed to go talk to their DR and get something done to fix a very fixable problem!
I look SO forward to feeling good again and not hurting and not feeling like I have a HUGE neon sign over my head that says "she pees her pants! To NOT having to wear "protection" and always being afraid that other people "know"
Even WITH the colonoscopy...I am glad I went..I am glad I am doing something about it..and I am glad that soon I will be all better!

So..I may be AWOL a bit more but I will try not to...but if I am just know I am getting fixed and being waited on and I will be back!!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    HA, ha! I am 56 and have avoided that dreaded colonoscopy for 6 years - this is my year. although I am waiting until I get new health insurance so it will be cheaper...

    So glad you have fessed up and told us - we missed you!

    Will be praying all goes well and you are up and around shortly!
    4100 days ago
    Ah yes, I managed to avoid that first "colonoscopy at age 50" until my BF opened his big fat mouth & told my doctor that I hadn't had one. Good news ~ you only have to have one every 10 years & I get to wait until I'm 66!! Whoopy!!

    As for the other mom experiences this! Her bladder actually "crowns" through an opening (to say it nicely). And if she relaxes in bed for awhile to get her bladder to relax back into position, then she is able to urinate.

    Growing older is certainly not what it's cracked up to be! You will definitely be tucked safely in my thoughts & prayers!!

    4108 days ago
  • MEME102
    Well from the OTHER AWOL soul -- you know I"m with you in spirit and in JL said tell us WHEN so we can cover you in prayer. Colonoscopies themselves are a 'piece of cake' compared to the prep -- that's the hard part!! And getting all done in ONE dose will be better for you...Love you much, think of you often and loved the pic of YOUR snow!! Know you're in my thoughts....
    4108 days ago
    So glad you are getting help. I 'm hoping for a speedy recovery.
    4109 days ago
  • JOLOWE56
    Joyce are covered in Prayer and everything will be just fine. The worst part for me is always the IV...after that...I'm home free! You won't feel a thing during the procedures and afterwards shouldn't be bad either. What day is all this gonna happen? Need to know that to kick in some extra prayers on that specific day to guide the doctors' hands and knowledge...Please keep us informed and know that everything will be fine...

    Love you,
    Joyce : ) emoticon
    4109 days ago
    I am in my 30's and already have "issues" please don't tell me this is what I have to look forward to.

    I'm glad you sought help!!

    4110 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4114015
    This was the most heartwarming blog I have seen! Joyce, I am going for my second colonoscopy in April and I agree totally with you. I never wanted to have one but my dad died of colon cancer in '99. Not a pretty way to go. But I am so much like him I go faithfully when they ask me to.
    As for the "other" shame there either! Like you DID something? NO WAY! Good for you and think how many are going to be able to be helped by this blog. You ROCK, girl! God Bless YOU!
    4110 days ago
  • no profile photo CD5551790
    Oh my sweet girlfriend!!!! I will keep you in my prayers!!!! I am probably looking at having that done soon, too. I take meds for overactive bladder right now. Dr. says mine not far enough along to do that yet. You take care and do let that hubby take care of you!!!!! Love you!!!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    4110 days ago
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