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Even the worst dark clouds have a silver lining, I guess.

Wednesday, March 03, 2010

Well, this week I have not been around very much.

No, I didn't go anti-social. But I did finally get laid off on Monday in IBM's latest round of job cuts in the US.

I was not alone - about 2,500 others were laid off with me on Monday. Nor was I the first - IBM had laid off several thousand people in 2009 and at the end of 2008 (estimates are as high as 35,000 total, although I think that is an exaggeration and it might be closer to 25,000 or 30,000.

So I certainly can't take this personally....and frankly, given that I came into IBM with an acquisition, and am one of the last 200 or so employees out of an original 1,600 that came in with that acquisition, my shelf-life was pretty decent.

That said, this is still no less terrible. I have a house, a mortgage, and bills to pay...and I have no husband with a second income that we can limp by on for a while. It's all me. And I will be in some serious financial troubles within about 4 months unless I find a job. Unemployment insurance will not even cover my mortgage, let alone utilities and other bills.

So...that was the 'dark cloud' in this blogs' title. And it is big. And VERY dark.

So what is the 'silver lining' then?

Well, I am finding myself reaching out not for the bag of cookies...but the treadmill as a way of coping. I don't WANT to eat. Not hungry. All I want to do is run. And run hard. Run out the stress.

So in that one way, the 'old me' is BACK. The me that was the runner, biker and triathlete 15 years ago. She's back. And I am very glad about that. And the thing is that no matter what, I will have running. If I lose the house and end up in bankruptcy...I'll still have a pair of running shoes. Running is MINE...and Corporate America, which has long been in the habit of raping my life on a fairly regular basis (it's scary how much overtime I have put in while in the accounting profession over the years - nights, weekends, holidays, whatever...and then they do crap like this), can't take that from me.

Lost 4.6 lbs on the scale at Weight Watchers tonight. Part of it was all the work I'd put in up until Monday...and I guess part of it is due to the stress and lack of appetite I've had since Monday. Plus sticking to my workouts and doing them extra hard to cope with stress.

Yeah...what is happening now is some serious sucktitude....but at least I am reaching for the running shoes instead of the bread machine.

Sooo....does anyone know of a place for CHEAP and healthy recipes???? emoticon

And do any of you Atlantans know of anyone in need of a good accountant? emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I'm so sorry to hear about your job (and sorry I don't know anyone who needs an accountant). I know being unemployed is extremely stressful, but it sounds like your running is going to be a big help. It's good that you can depend on that to help you feel better. Best wishes on your job search!

    [When you have a minute, check your SparkMail. I just sent you a message a few minutes ago.]
    4166 days ago
    Stock up on dried beans and brown rice. Walmart near me sells dried beans in 5lb bags. I usually have kidney, lentils (green and red), white beans of many kinds, red beans, and black eyed peas. From those items I add fresh veggies or frozen veggies on sale. I have 10-15 different recipes.

    In Atlanta right now you can plant a garden can't you? Seeds are cheap. You have the time and that way you only have to buy veggies from your local market until your crops come in.

    I can support you and send you recipes if you would like. I have been out of work for 7 months. I do have a DH with a job, but we cut back on everything. Remember you can apply for food stamps and other state sponsored help to find work.

    God Bless you on this wild ride.
    4166 days ago
  • DS9KIE
    Bad that you have lost your job. Good that your running for stress and not eating cookies.

    Well another way I save on food is don't buy anything that you can live without, like cookies, chips, ha ha, we don't need that stuff anyway. I just buy meal foods and stuff that goes together. So if I can only get five items I just make sure I can use the five item five different ways.
    emoticon emoticon
    4166 days ago
    I hate hearing that you got laid off-I was out of work, except for some freelance stuff, during a good portion of 2009, and it was pretty dang horrible. I'm still struggling somewhat, but I do have a job now, and there is some money coming in.

    Really glad to hear that you're running out the stress, though. If it wasn't for my church, and training for my marathon and half-marathon last year, I would have been a total basket case. As it was, I was only a partial basket case.

    As far as the job thing goes, since we are in tax season, have you thought about advertising on craigslist? I'm sure there are a lot of folks who could use some help preparing their taxes, or at least getting ready to, if you don't like the actual tax preparation thing. Also, I belong to a mailing list on yahoo groups for actors. An awful lot of us are self-employed, or earn a lot from self-employment, and could use help with tax prep. If you'd like, I can post your contact info and get your name out there for that. Just drop me a line and let me know. And take care, things will get better!
    4166 days ago
    Sorry about the job loss. I worked in corporate world for 30 years and managed to leave on a voluntary retirement. Cutting headcount is rampant. The thing is, it can give you a chance to think about what you would really like to do. You have such a good attitude, enjoy the silver and work through the dark.

    Cheap recipes - there are lots of recommendations on SP and great recipes. I've seen lots of them in the Message Boards
    messageboard_topics.asp?imboard=7 and search cheap. Lots of threads will come up. Of course, my favorite cheap food is pinto beans and rice. There are lots of variations of that in SP recipes.

    Wishing you the best!
    4166 days ago
    I am sorry about your being laid off -- and being the victim of this bad economy.
    Your attitude, though, is positive -- and that is so important.

    Good luck to you in your job search!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    4166 days ago
    I'm sorry you were laid off, but am glad you have a very healthy mindset about it. That would be a huge emotional obstacle, and it would be hard not to turn to food. "Burn the land and boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me..."
    4167 days ago
    I'm sorry you were laid off and I will be praying for you to find employment that suits and delights you. Your response is awesome because you are actually pumping yourself up by running instead of slumping by reaching for the cookies. You need every bit of energy for the job search ahead and all that health and vitality to shine out during your interviews.

    Best wishes,
    emoticon emoticon
    4167 days ago
  • _UMAMI_
    So sorry to hear about your layoff. One of my best friends is going through a similar situation---got laid off from Wyeth in the Fall, has a foreclosure issue in Nevada.... (ETA: and duh, she's a former triathlete as well, and pushes herself, like you!)

    But hey---it sounds like you're in a good field, and will land on your feet. RUNNING!

    Way to go on the weight loss and workouts. Surely some good will come of this (temporary) setback.

    4167 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/3/2010 9:42:35 PM
    My thoughts and prayers are with you. I think it is great that you are not stress eating but the mother in me is hoping that you are eating enough :)
    4167 days ago
    I hear ya! I got laid off at the end of January and I'm still looking for a job. I wasn't exactly in love with my job and we did get notice, but it was still a huge stress and life change. I've never been unemployed before - not since the age of 6! (I worked on our family's farm for $100/summer.)

    I completely lost my appetite because of all the stress and worry. I tried to keep cool, keep calm, enjoy a bit of the time off but I just didn't feel like eating. The only thing that kept me going was my boyfriend's cooking and meeting my SparkPeople calorie range's bottom limit.

    I also took up running with some pretty intense enthusiasm. I've been running almost everyday since being laid off. It's something that I own - it's me time, it's alone time, it's get-me-out-of-this-tiny-apartment time.

    Most of the healthy recipes I've used over the past few months have been from sparkrecipes. Have you checked that out?

    If I get a nice job and/or start my own business and I need an accountant I'll fly you out from Atlanta!! : )

    Good luck & stay strong!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    4167 days ago
    Glad to see that you realize the job doesn't own you and you have discovered a silver lining. Sorry I don't need an accountant. Atlanta is pretty far away. I used to travel to Ft. McPherson when I was in the military eons ago. You have an interesting problem that we all face- eating healthy without going broke. Prayers to you. emoticon
    4167 days ago
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