attitude flip = flippin good workout! ;)
Monday, February 15, 2010
so i should be starting my period in the next 24 hours (not that you REALLY needed to know that, but whatever lol) and for some reason i was being super critical of myself today.. started my day by standing in the mirror in just a bra and underwear and i was looking at all the things that i want to change... and then i started getting grossed out, frustrated, and discouraged. i even did what i know i shouldn't do.. (this is going to sound messed up but i know a lot of people do it) i started grabbing at my outter thigh fat, my stomach, my tricep area... and i was seriously pissed. and ashamed. the fact that i BUSTED BUTT to get to goal in 2008, met my goal of 140 in august of that year... and then allowed my self to gain 15 pounds since then REALLY makes me angry. but whatever, i've blogged about that whole topic before, and what's important is that i got back on my grind and i'm working towards getting close to 140 again. 145 seems to be a lil bit easier for me to maintain and i feel fantastic at that weight, so i'm not gonna say 140 is really my goal, but i mean.. at this point i have a sense of urgency to lose 10 pounds. i need to get back to 145, and if i drop 10, that's exactly where i'll be! so yea, today i started out really moody and disgusted... and called my gym to see if they were open, and they were! sooo i relaxed a lil in the morning, headed to the gym, went tanning, and spent 2 hours there! i did 1 hour on the arc trainer doing intervals and completed 3 miles/ 765 calories!!! i did an hour of lifting, too. felt so good to feel the pump that it gives ya... so yea, i had a really productive day at the gym and told myself to stop being so hard on myself because i've done it before, and i'll do it again.. i'll drop the 10!!! my honey mentioned wanting to hit up the NPC Jay Cutler Classic on May 22nd in Boston, and i'd LOVE to go to that!!! we've also been talking about planning a vacation for this year... which is much needed. Alsoooo... been browsing victoriassecret.com and lookin at some swimsuits.. thinking bout buying one soon so that i have some physical motivation! LOL anyway, i'm feeling good.. relaxing for the rest of the night. expecting some snow tomorrow morning, hoping it's not too bad cuz i really want to hit the gym hard at 6am.. sooo sorry i ramble here, but i just wanted to say helloooo and you know :) have an awesome week, friends!!!