How to Get the Fire Back

Friday, February 12, 2010

For too many months now, I keep feeling like "this is the day" and I'll recommit to eating healthy and within my calories and then I easily (too easily) decide to do something completely counter to that. I am tired of it, and what is starting to bug me is that this is my new normal - periodically overeating and choosing things that I know aren't good for me. It is intensely frightening. I see the health effects of living a life like that & I DON'T want to choose that, but my actions are speaking very loudy. I want to do something to fix this malaise, this easy drop down into using food as an emotional crutch, but I don't know what the magic is. I do know that I'm pretty tired of the status quo, even though I'm not in a great deal of pain right now. I mean, I'm 15 lbs over the weight that I want to be, probably only 10 over where I'd be happy to be, but it feels like 100. I guess the fact that it's NOT 100 is part of what holds me back - I think to myself, it's not so bad. And I settle. It's really bugging me, sometimes I think the emotional pain counts for more than the physical, although the physical is quite real. My knees hurt more than usual, and I worry about long-term health consequences. Eating a box of sugar cereal is terrible for blood sugar regulation.
You know, the bottom line is I feel fat & I don't feel like me, yet I've been at this weight for so long that I'm starting to question if I can ever go back. How much do I really want this? Do I have the strength to do this? It's not that it's unknown to me what it takes. Why do I so easily give up my goals?
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  • no profile photo CD4082898
    I second Lhetzel. If you look at the whole journey all at once, all you will be is frusterated. Yes, you want to know where you would like to be in the end but all you need to do is focus on that one step in front of you.

    Focus on one success a day:
    Not eating the cereal today. emoticon Getting in a short walk. emoticon Drinking an extra glass of water. emoticon Getting to bed on time. emoticon

    Best of luck to you! emoticon
    3656 days ago
    You sound so frustrated. I try to not look at the big picture. I scale it back some and take baby steps. I love to run but I fail to make it happen most of the time. Instead I have been walking my dogs. Seem like I'm not doing much but what has happened has been amazing. I have increased energy, the dogs love it, I forgot how beautiful it is outside. It's cold here too. I realize that doing something, anything even small can have a huge benefit. It will hopefully get you unstuck. Good luck.
    3656 days ago
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