Today was a day to test my resolve.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
It seems like when I have my mind made up to do something, life has to make sure I really want to follow through. True to form, I blogged on my resolutions yesterday and today....well....today basically stunk.
I woke up this morning with intestinal cramps and a killer headache, I stayed in bed until noon but didn't really sleep as I was too uncomfortable. I tried to meditate and ride the waves to calm down the discomfort.
I finaly got up to watch my Soap Opera and check the mail, including my Spark mail and remembered yesterday's blog and how upbeat I was about my exercise plan with built in days off in case I needed them. I certainly didn't feel like exercising today. I'd rather have my teeth drilled. But, then the same questions hit that have hit several times before when I started an exercise program. Sure....I have a headache etc, but is it really bad enough to keep me from exercise? Will exercising make things worse? If I do exercise, is it because I am in all or nothing mode? Would I be doing what is right and caring for myself by taking the day off or by doing some form of activity anyway? What is the right thing to do?
I never really know how to answer these questions. If I don't exercise, it is all to easy for me to give up. I've been there and done that many times over. If I do exercise, am I listening to my body? I ran through a checklist. Maybe the headache is from not eating. I had a teaspoon of peanut butter. I didn't feel like eating. I also made a pot of coffee and took a tylenol. Perhaps caffeine would help the headache. The abdominal discomfort had died down. . I didn't feel like I would injure anything or cause more distress by doing my 10 minute minimum of cardio. But I just didn't feel like it.
I sat and nursed my coffee until mid afternoon while pondering these questions; and finally decided I may as well do some in home walking. Dr Phil was on so I decided to walk until the next commercial. Funny thing, I got interested in Dr Phil and before I knew it, a half hour had gone by. I didn't feel any worse nor did I feel any better, but if I could do a half hour while engrossed in TV, maybe I could do the rest. I wasn't doing anything strenuous...just moderate activity walking at home.
I did my 60 minutes. Its now going on 10pm and I still have the headache. Its not as intense but it is still there. The abdominal discomfort is gone. I finally made myself some dinner after not eating all day. And I am still questioning whether or not I should have exercised. I really don't know if I did it to take care of myself or if I did it because I felt like I HAD to. Would I have kicked myself if I hadn't? I don't know. I just don't know. But part of me is glad that I did.