"Tough Love"...Originally posted by spark’s member: LADYBUG7157

Friday, November 13, 2009

Do you feel like quitting? Okay, then quit. Just quit. Just close your browser window and stop reading now. If you’re wanting to quit, then stop your bellyaching and just do it already.

I’ll wait…

Okay, now, if you’re still here reading this, then listen up—

STOP WHINING. Stop crying. Stop saying it’s too hard. Stop making excuses. Stop complaining. Stop looking at other people’s success and feeling bad about your own plateau/gain/feelings of failure/mistakes. Just STOP it.

There is no magic potion. There is no weight loss miracle. There is not even a remote possibility that you will wake up tomorrow/next week/90 days from now and look like Jillian Michaels. You can count points/carbs/pre-packaged meals/fat-blocking pills all you want to. You can go on every diet and try every “method” known to man. At the end of the day, the only way to lose weight is this:

YOU MUST BURN MORE CALORIES THAN YOU EAT. When you burn more calories than you eat, your body will burn fat for energy. One pound of fat is equal to 3,500 calories; therefore, between diet and exercise, you must have a deficit of 3,500 calories to lose one pound.

That’s it. That’s the magical secret of weight loss*. You’re welcome. (*Okay, I admit, there is an addendum to the magical secret of weight loss: metabolism plays a role. Do you know how to boost your metabolism? Eat appropriate amounts of protein/fat/carbs. Drink your water. Build muscle. Take any opportunity to be active. Get enough sleep. If none of these work, talk to your doctor. But slow metabolism still doesn’t change the fact that you must burn more calories than you eat.)

At the end of the day, it is about math. Simple math. So why is this so hard? I will tell you why…

YOU KEEP GETTING IN YOUR OWN WAY. Get out of the way! Stop undermining yourself. Stop giving up. Stop cheating yourself. Stop making excuses. Just STOP it.

Be consistent. How can you cheat on your diet the whole weekend and skip workouts and then get mad that you don’t lose weight? The only way to make this work is to take it one meal at a time, one workout at a time, one day at a time, one week at a time. Do the right thing, and then do it again, and then do it again, and then do it again.

Find another reason you want this besides just the number on the scale. That scale will be a fickle b*tch, so you need know that there is something else besides that scale that matters. What is it for you?

Life will throw you curveballs. It always does. So what? That’s life! Hallelujah! You need to find it in yourself to look at crap that happens and say, “Whatever,” and move on. You have very little control over what happens in your life, but do you know what you can control? You can control how you react to it. YOU. Own it.

And when you feel like giving up, you need to decide if you are in or out. You need to decide if you are strong enough. You need to decide if you are willing to sweat/cry/bleed/get emotional/get to work/do something new/move forward/try harder. But that is YOUR decision. If you want to decide to quit, go right ahead. But let me ask you—

When gaining weight isn’t an option, and staying the same weight isn’t acceptable, then the only choice is to start losing, right? It doesn’t matter if it’s slow. It’s probably better if it’s slow. All that matters is that you are trying/making better choices/eating healthier/exercising more/keeping a positive attitude.

If you wake up one morning and that fickle b*tch of a scale goes up/stays the same/doesn’t go down enough, are you going to give up? No, you are not. You are going to keep trying, even harder this time, and you are going to figure out what it is going to take to get it done.

This process is long. It is hard. I will grant you that.

But this process will teach you about yourself. It will create a healthy person where an unhealthy person once stood. You will become strong, not just in your muscles, but in your mind. You will achieve. You will succeed. You will gain a love of yourself, good food, and being active. You will learn to love yourself. You will make yourself a priority, which will make you better able to help/love/support/set an example for those who depend on you. These things CANNOT happen overnight. And when you finally do lose the weight, you will understand and love the process. You will see that you are amazing, not only because the accomplishment, but because you endured the process of achieving the accomplishment. And because you didn’t quit.

And one more thing… I am giving you tough love right now. But I want to know something…

When was the last time you were tough on yourself? When is the last time you told yourself “NO”? When is the last time you set boundaries for yourself, and then made yourself accountable to those boundaries? Do you accept your own excuses? Do you realize that when you cheat, you are cheating YOURSELF?


When was the last time you loved yourself? When was the last time you ate right or exercised because it made you feel good? When is the last time you thanked your body for all it can do? When is the last time you appreciated the curve of your hips and the power in your legs? Are you giving yourself positive reinforcement, or are you always telling yourself that you are a fat failure who isn’t good enough?

Tough. Love.

Life has thrown me a curveball this week. I will not give up, and I don’t want to see anyone else giving up either.

Never give up. NEVER, ever give up.

You can do this. YOU can do this. You CAN do this. You can DO this. YOU CAN DO THIS.
Originally posted by spark’s member: LADYBUG7157
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Thank you LADYBUG7157 and CARPEDIEM_2009...

    I enjoyed reading this and it's nothing but the truth. Thanks so much. Great reality check and plenty to think about. emoticon emoticon
    3371 days ago
    Thank you for the shout out and for the comments! I am glad this inspires you!

    Have a great weekend!
    3385 days ago
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