today is the first day

I have a counseling appointment today. I thought is was yesterday, silly me. I am glad, I have A LOT to get off my chest. course I wont have anything left there since there wasn't much to begin with. So yesterday I spent teh day trying to sort out what I wanted to say to this guy, and then remembered...DUH!!!! I have one more day. Yesterday I was having an anxiety attack allll day!!!
am just about out of meds, and have had to resort to cutting them in half to make them last untill I can get more, which wont be until the 29th....AAARRRGGGHHH I will make it though, a frined told me of a place I may be able to get some, I will ask the counselor today. maybe he can give me ideas.
Have a few things running through my head. wish I could run that fast. dam I can't catch up to my thoughts...they run like a three year old who just stole candy. so I also apparently didn't get the other job, that's ok with me.I think I am to old now to be working 70 plus hours a week. Thirty years ago I did it all the time. and well I can barely get out of bed now, and just cant seem to think straight now.
I wanted the job for the money, But I guess (and hope) God has better plans for me.
I just have to leave it in his hands
Funny no-one is up but me and I smell BACON!!!!!! can hardly wait till I can have it again ok my fingers are writing as my mind rambles...I must get ready for wotk..Truck comes in today and I have to get done in time...