Do It And Finish
Monday, September 14, 2009
A good spark friend’s comments made me start thinking. I used to always enter into a race with the mind set of "just finish", but after I started to increase my speed and get new Personal Bests, getting a faster time is what has permeated my race mentality. While I’d say “I don’t care about my finish time,” I really did; and having a slow race in Virginia Beach proved that to me. I know what slowed me down – sore hips, heat and humidity, concern about my shin splint, old shoes, reworked orthotics, and more. Some of these things I can easily remedy while others I know I have to power through or just put up with them.
While the ½ marathoner is good at seeing the issues and what I need to do, the personal me is good at not really facing reality. I know what I’m doing wrong, what I’m doing right and what I’m just not doing, but I’m also good at not taking those things to heart. So it’s time to fess up and admit to myself the one thing I don’t want to say. I have gained back much of the weight I lost earlier this year. I know the reasons why and the excuses that lead to the problem but don’t necessarily know the way to remedy the situation. It’s going to take a bit more digging.
Funny how I know my racing issues more completely than I do my own personal issues. Focus has a lot to do with it. I know how to fix my race problems and that those I can’t fix I can handle, it’s not so on the personal side so it’s easier to be the ½ marathoner.
I have 4 more ½ marathon races this year and even though I’d love to hit another PB I’m going to follow Lisa’s lead; she said “Don't worry not every race can be a personal best! The fact that you do it AND finish is amazing!!”
On the personal side it’s time to start where I can and that means giving up my lifelong doctor, finding a doctor who will take my insurance and setting an appointment; then really looking at my fears and fix those problems I can and handle those I can’t.
Lisa, you said I’m an inspiration, but it’s you who has inspired me to look at myself a little deeper - Thanks, Lisa!