Dark insomniac night of the soul
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Well heh it's not that bad but I am just wide awake and super stressed.
This week (um or two? I forget) has been crazy for me. I think it's the worst I've done since I got back on here at actually tracking everything I eat. Mind you I haven't been eating like crazy, I've mostly been not eating enough. And I've still done pretty good at tracking.
But yeah I am just so so stressed, it's like physical and mental and buzzing all over me. I keep spacing and forgetting what I'm doing and so on.
I guess I should remind myself that even positive change is stressful. I have been making some huge and often scary changes in my life and just trying to contemplate making even bigger ones is another stress, along with discovering and reordering my priorities. Some of them major huge life choices.
i wonder if I'm taking on too much or pushing myself too far. Also wondering if I need meds not just for depression/anxiety but more along the lines of being bipolar. Well at least I have a counselor and psychiatrist now and I can talk to them about this stuff, but yeah I just can't seem to relax and either clear my mind, or stay well focused to a task.