So I Took Off My Clothes!
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
We went to the beach this past weekend. My sister has a beach house. So my 25 and 28 year old nieces were there in their little bikinis and my sister who will be 60 is a skinny minny and then there's me.
I'm sitting in the sun with my tank top and shorts over my bathing suit. Why I thought to myself. Hmm...Maybe because my whole life I worried about what everyone else thought of me. I'm 44 and have my beautiful 3 year old playing in the sand. Isn't time I stop worrying if my thighs aren't the perfect size and my butt isn't what it used to be? Will I ever be happy with the way I look? Obviously I waste a lot of time thinking about it. Trust me, I've been through a lot with my past (hospitalized with eating disorder and through a lot of therapy, etc...) so I know my body image isn't my only issue
So I did it. I just stood up and took my shirt off and then my shorts slipped down. And I didn't crash to the ground as fast as I could; I slowing walked over to my beach bag and put my clothes in them and then sipped some water. It felt soooo good.
Does anyone relate to this feeling. It was like what the heck have I been doing to myself. So I don't have any great moral to my story and I will still worry later today as I cook dinner for my FIL, but I don't feel as stressed walking around in my shorts and I can get back to eating healthy because of my cholesterol and not get so caught up in the weight loss.
Thanks for reading.