Sunday, June 07, 2009

This last week has been the worst I've had in a long time. I finally gave up the smokes again a month ago and also went back to eating healthy. At first it felt like I lost a couple of pounds but now I feel like I've gained a ton!!!!! I feel bigger than ever, I feel horrible & nothing fits. It is so discouraging. I just can't figure out how I've gained when I've cut out all the junk. I eat 3 meals a day and I've been doing alot of yard work & I've gained????????? It makes me feel really depressed and I'm so upset over it, I have no motivation to do anything.

Along with being bummed out about the not smoking and the weight gain, a friend was diagnosed with a brain tumor a week ago. The pathology results should be in tomorrow. The only thing we know right now is that it's unoperable because of it's location. Also it originated in the brain which is good because if it had migrated than that would've meant cancer somewhere else in her body and that has definitely been ruled out. But it just sucks that this is happening to her.

Writing usually dissipates the tension, stress & overall blues but it just ain't happening right now........... I'm trying to stay positive & get myself back on track mentally because when you're down, you're down about everything & that's not good. I'd like to just take off on a month long vacation to a deserted island somewhere - just me w/no responsibilities to people, pets, family, etc. Just me laying in the sand, eyes closed, soaking up the sun, listening to the surf, smelling the salt water and being wrapped up in a warm gentle breeze. No phones, no tv, no noises period. I'd come back a new woman - calm, relaxed, energized and balanced...................
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • T2896TERRY
    sorry to hear about your friend...i'll pray for your friend..stress is a factor in weight loss...it reeks havoc on you hormones and will cause you to gain the weight..your body is also getting used to not smoking...don't get discouraged...keep on pushing through...you will lose the weight...instead of a vacation, take a nice long walk
    good luck to you and god bless
    3783 days ago
    hi i don't comment much on here but wanted to commend you on quitting smoking !! my husband died of a massive heart attack almost 14 years ago he was a pretty heavy smoker our Dr said it was the cigarettes that killed him you will lose in time pat yourself on the back for what you have accomplished!! emoticon
    3783 days ago
    Can't take a vacation, try a bubble bath and sit back and relax, listen to soothing music, etc. I am so sorry to hear about your friend, all of you will be in my prayers tonight. Tie a knot and hang in there.
    3783 days ago
    do you measure your food and track it? maybe it's not what you're eating but how much.

    3783 days ago
    Hang in there I have also quit smoking today is day 53 without (I SMOKED FOR 40 YEARS) so whenever you quit you gain weight something about your matabalism I have gained 10 pounds since quitting so it will stabablize so hang in there I understand how you feel tho its the reason I have joined Sparks want to loose 35 pounds
    3783 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.