Abraham and Isaac
Friday, May 22, 2009
Sure wish there was an autobiography out there written by Abraham. The Bible passage where God told Abraham to sacrifice Isaac is only 18 verses long (22nd chapter of Genesis). I really wonder what emotions Abraham went through as he prepared: did he cry as he split the wood for the fire, did he wander down memory lane as he journeyed three days to Moriah, did he have to tell Sarah what he was going to do, did he say any tearful good-byes?
THEN, he bound Isaac, and laid him on the altar...he stretched out his hand and took the knife to slay his son!
THEN, God told him to stop.
The Bible says Abraham's response was to look up and he saw the ram provided, then he named that place "The Lord Will Provide".
I want to know the emotions he felt. I am sure he was elated he didn't have to kill Isaac, but was he angry and wonder why he had to go through all that hard preparation the last three days? Was he sad, was he releived, was he thankful.
I feel the last four years I was preparing for that sacrifice: to leave my mother, my children my grandsonm, my home, my friends...and willing to do so for my Lord. Then, As I stepped out to go, God said, "Stop".
I am thrilled to get to stay in my home and be near my loved ones...but at the same time, I am so sad that I do not get to go. I am sad to disappoint those waiting for us there. I even feel a little fear as I wonder if this was just a "Wait" and down the road I will be asked to go through that whole process again.
At first I was angry, but now just extremely curious as to what those 4 years of preparing were for. Were they years of testing? Learning obedience? Learning to submit to God and to my husband? How will those years be used now? I truly believe those experiences will not be wasted.
So, what do I do now? I feel a little lost. Unsure where to step next.
After God spared Isaac, He sent Abraham home.
I am home. I am thankful. I will worship Him Who knows the best plan for me...even if I do not see the next step.