What does success really mean? A new way of thinking...

Saturday, March 07, 2009

This past week, I was invited to a catered dinner event at work. At first, I didn't want to deal with the temptation, figuring I'd probably "blow it" like I always have in the past. But I knew that attending was the right thing to do, because one of my employees was being recognized at the event, and I wanted to be there for her.

In the past on the day of the dinner, I would have eaten very little to "save up" my calories so I could indulge that evening. Of course, that thinking ultimately backfires because I'd be so hungry by dinner I would eat everything in sight, and then feel guilty that I failed. This time, I decided to play it a little different. I ate healthy during the day, maybe a little lighter, but really not much different than a normal day. Before I went to dinner, I was nervous--I didn't know what was being served, so I had no idea what kinds of choices I would have available. I knew I needed to mentally prepare myself. The single most important thing would be to avoid the "all or nothing" trap that I usually fall prey to, so I decided to base success or failure on my ability to stay in control and eat appropriate portions. I figured tracking my food and calories in SP would be challenging, so for this special event I would just use the Note in my food tracker to journal what I ate, but give myself the leeway to not have to figure out the calories.

Dinner started with a salad--delicious greens, apple pieces, with walnuts and cheese and some kind of strange dressing I've never had before. I ate most of the salad but decided to leave some on the plate just to prove I could. So far, so good. Dinner was both a chicken breast and beef tenderloin, with mashed potatoes and veggies. Wow, too much food! I took very small bites at a time and ate slowly, and in the end I ate only about half of everything on my plate. This is easier than I thought it would be! Then came the real test...dessert. It was a rich, creamy, chocolaty, layered something-or-other, and it spelled trouble! Do I just politely say "No, thank you." and watch everyone else eat theirs? I knew that would only lead to me feeling deprived, which usually ends in sabotage down the road, and I just didn't want to risk that. So, I decided I had come this far, I can do this too. This was the first real "naughty food" I had eaten since starting this journey. I took the first bite and savored it slowly. I decided pretty quickly the bottom layer and crust were good, but the top was the best, so I would just stick with eating the top. I ate it slowly and enjoyed every morsel. When I was done, the bottom layers laid on the plate, and I could feel the temptation rising to just eat the rest of it, but I resisted, and it felt good.

In the end, I left feeling proud of myself and the decisions I made...never before have I left half of any food on my plate. That was a first! And, I felt physically comfortable, not bloated and heavy feeling like I usually would have been from eating everything. All the way home, I thought about how good it felt to stay in control, and even though I'm sure the calories were higher than I should have had, and the desert especially was not a "good choice," I knew this was a major victory and a very positive step in my journey. I picked up the next morning as if nothing had happened--I stayed on course--and that really is what it's all about.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You did well!! Proud of ya!
    3696 days ago
  • BUBBLES1541
    Way to go! I'm always tempted by good food but I'm developing a new relationship with food. :)
    3696 days ago
  • DINA:-)
    congratulations on staying in control! this is what it's all about- you should be very proud of yourself. it's okay to have those naughty foods, but in moderation. and it's okay to eat some extra calories occasionally as long as you are in control. way to go on overcoming the "all or nothing" mentality!

    3696 days ago
    WOO...WAY TO GO! That is such an accomplishment you should be proud of yourself! Also, you are totally right about "if" you didn't eat that dessert, you would feel deprive. It's okay to eat these tempting foods...but in moderation. And you did just that! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!

    You've got the right concept about choosing the right food eating out...AWESOME blog!
    emoticon emoticon Jazzy!!
    3697 days ago
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