Sunday, February 01, 2009

This is me, doing what I do. Accountable until I don't want to be anymore-this thing swept over me again, causing this shameless laziness and then paralyzing self-pity that only allows enough mobility to get the junk to my lips, chew, and swallow.

I think it's a stronghold, but I'm still not sure how it works in me. I don't believe in myself. I don't believe in dreams coming true. I don't think I will ever be healthy or pretty or smart or significant. It's the thing talking-I know. Problem is I AGREE with it. I'm not supposed to, none of us are when it comes over us. It's a blanket of failure warming us up to the bed of defeat that it wants us to live in for the rest of our lives and I KNOW THIS...but I'm rolling over for the nap.

I don't post threads coz I don't wanna waiste people's time. I have no motivation or desire to do what it takes, because seriously, I feel like it's too late. I know somebody will say your still so young, blah blah blah-I don't know. I'm fine until I'm not and instead of progress being made and then the sabotage we just went right to the sabotage.

It's February.

My thinking isn't right. emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Just remember who your are in Christ Jesus. We HAVE the power over the enemy and we don't have to listen! Remember he came to devour, to kill, and to destroy. Jesus came so that we can have life, but to have it abundantly! You CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens you, so don't give anything that can feed the enemy's antics. Reclaim your life in Christ, get up and walk! Remember girl, you're never alone, either with your brothers and sisters in Christ, with Christ, and even with your sparkbuddies. Just don't give up! emoticon
    4475 days ago
    If you need more support please sparkmail me.. even when I gain, even when I feel like giving up, I stay because it is a matter of life and death for me. We all have those days btu unless our friends know what we are feeling, they don't know we need the support so please please post on threads, start new threads asking for help, you know people will gladly offer support... not everyone knows you are struggling unless you get your head out of the sand! We are here for you!

    TracyZ emoticon
    4477 days ago
  • BIGGIRL2082010
    POST on those threads you're resisting posting on. We DO want to hear - don't forget that the challenges you're having, someone else may've already gone through (VERY likely), and will have some suggestions that'll get you out of the funk. Also, anything you're running into, I'm pretty sure there are others (me, me!) who are going through it right now, too, and it just helps to have someone else say they're dealing with it, too!

    So, don't beat yourself up. Okay, you fell off the wagon. Well, who said that wagon HAD to be right in that spot, anyway? You get up now, dust yourself off, and move the wagon to where YOU want it to be! If you're trying to make everything "perfect" at one time, it'll be MUCH harder on you - just focus on ONE thing for 2 or 3 weeks (drinking more water? getting in 10 minutes of exercise? Eating ONE green thing - no, NOT green eggs - per day? Measuring your food so you get a re-confirmation of what a "real" portion size is?) When you're SURE you have that ONE thing firmly under control, then pick another SMALL thing to add in for the next 3 weeks (and continue doing the first one).

    Before you know it, you'll have this whole thing under control!

    And yes, DO blog and post about the journey! That's the only way we know when to celebrate with you, and when to head over with commiserations or a swift kick! :)


    4477 days ago
    Ok for 1 you aren't wasting anyone's time!!! We are all here for the same reason!! We need support!! Everyone WILL encourage and motivate you!!! Copy your blog on to the thread and start feeling the love!!!

    Second, you are worth far more that you are giving yourself credit!!! God does make junk. Now with that said. Here is a hug for you emoticon .

    Stop letting one mistake turn into two, three or more. Just realize that you made a mistake and start fresh again!!! None of us are perfect. We all fall of the wagon!! I feel off it hard last June or July and have finally decided to get back on!!! However, while off the wagon I gained back almost every pound that I had lost over a 2 year period!!! I had to just say it has to stop and start fresh!! That's all you need to do!!! If you continue to beat yourself up, I will continue to fall backward!!! So as of right now, go to the mirror look at your beautiful self and say " I AM WORTH IT!!!!
    4477 days ago
    I'm so glad you wrote this blog..... you aren't wasting peoples time. People wouldn't read your blogs and respond if they didn't care. I have many of the same feelings as you and I know many others do too. I have been a member here for over a year now but I haven't given it 100%... shoot if I am going to be honest it is probably more like 25%. I had some good weeks and then got frustrated and discouraged. I participated in a couple challenges to loose 10 pounds in a month and failed. I started beleiving that I couldn't do this. I am a breast cancer survivor and I know I need to loose weight, eat healthier, and exersize but sometimes it just gets so overwhelming. The middle of January I decided to start over because I am worth it and I can do it. I know I need to loose at least 50 pounds but right now I am just focusing on 10 pounds at a time. I want to loose 10 pounds by St Patty;s day. If you want a buddy or just want to talk ...I am here. YOU CAN DO THIS.... YOU ARE WORTH IT!!! Kathy
    4477 days ago
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