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perks of growing old

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Someone had to remind me, so I'm reminding you too. Don't is all true...

The perks of reaching 50, or being over 60 and heading towards 70 are:

01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

03. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

04. People call at 9 pm and ask: did I wake you?

05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac

06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

07. Things you buy now won't wear out.

08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.

09. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    An elderly woman did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags, drew her handgun, and proceeded to scream at them at the top of her voice, "I have a gun and I know how to use it! Get out of the car, you scumbags!"
    The four men didn't wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad. The woman, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags in the back of the car and get into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, to no avail.
    And then it dawned on her why. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station.
    The sergeant, to whom she told the story, nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale males were reporting a carjacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.

    3702 days ago
    What a great blog! I only hold my stomach in on the scale... *giggle*
    3711 days ago
    Loved your blog!! SO true
    3721 days ago
    There are perks???? LOL ...

    3721 days ago
  • PAMELA984
    It is so true that it is a bit frightening, isn't it? LOL!
    3721 days ago
    Oh, that is really true, isn't it! Thanks for a happy start to my day once again.

    3721 days ago
  • TURTLE24
    Love the blog! Lolly
    3721 days ago
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