Today, as the saying goes, is the first day of the rest of my life. After so many failed attempts to attain a healthy weight, today I am starting the preliminary diet given to me by my surgeon's office to help prepare me for Lap Band surgery. My goal is to take 20 pounds off within the next 2 months, also hopefully before we go to Vegas in March which will make the flight a little more comfortable. I have been working on chewing more thoroughly and not drinking with meals here and there, but as of today, I am committing to work on this with every meal. So far, so good...of course, I have only eaten one meal that way, but it's a start. The hardest part so far is to not have coffee with my breakfast. My surgeon recommends giving up coffee completely before surgery, but I'm just not sure I can or want to do that. I am right now counting the minutes from when I finished my breakfast, and when I hit 30, I'm getting a cup of Joe!
I know this process is going to take a lot more organization, planning and preparation than what I am used to (well anything would, really, since most of the time I'm just flying by the seat of my pants). Setting aside some "me" time every day to exercise is also something I am not used to, so that will be a challenge too. It's not a matter of whether I want to or not anymore, I have to make myself do it if I am going to be successful.
As I prepare for surgery, I am worried...not so much about the surgery, but about how disciplined I will be. Will this be one more failed attempt like so many others in my life? I just cannot allow that to happen. I know my resolve will be tested many times, and how will I fare? My biggest challenge will be to change how I relate to food. It can no longer be my closest friend, the one I run to when I'm happy, depressed, or frustrated. I need to get past my current passions for taste, texture, etc., and begin to see food for what it really is, fuel that nourishes my body and provides energy and vitality.
I meet with the psychologist today for my first evaluation. Wouldn't it be wonderful to discover some deep dark secret within my psyche that has caused me to overeat all my life. Okay, wishful thinking...
Well, at least for now, I am on the right track. One step at a time...oh, and how could I forget...10 minutes until coffee!!