I am here

Ok ... taking a deep breath and actually posting a blog on here! I discovered this site months ago but have not taken full advantage off all it has to offer. Mostly because I am afraid, but also because I "spread the spark" and now others know what I am attempting to do. Once my friends and family know my plan for weightloss, then I lose it (not the weight, unfortunately, but IT) ... I shut down, because I think I put all of this pressure to succeed on my shoulders. Rather than try and "fail" I stop altogether. You can't fail at something you don't do, right? *rolling eyes* I have spent my entire life worrying about what others think of me and about me and the time has come to stop. Who, by worrying, can add even one hour to his life? Not me ...

I have an extreme amount of weight to lose ... am an emotional/stress eater ... have been dragged through a very low valley these past couple of months ... and battle clinical depression. *Whew* That is a lot, isn't it? So ... I am reaching out to Spark - I am a member of a few Spark teams, but no one really knows me. It is hard for me to just jump in and join, but I know I need friends and accountability partners. So ... I am going to do my best to be around here more.