Adjusting to the 210lbs weight loss
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Wow!!! I never thought I would say that. It certainly has been life changing. Just in the way that I feel is totally remarkable. I have so much energy now its hard for me to sit still. No more aches in my bones and joints they feel the best they have ever felt. I have severe arthritis in both my knees but that doesnt even bother me anymore. Through my weight training and boxing I have muscles that I never ever thought I would have, Im actually seeing a figure and a butt!!! that has been hidden for a looooonnnnnnggggggg timmmmeeee.(lol)
I know my body is giving me a big thank you right now. Many of my co-workers who knew me at 420lbs all say they cant even imagine me like that anymore and all I can say is thank GOD!!! When I look at myself in the miror now its like Im looking at someone else, that its really not me. It scares me and then I cant help but cry because Ive done something Ive always told myself that I could never do. That it was impossible, there is no way I can lose all this weight, that I was too far gone, that I cant do it, Ive tried and failed so many times why should this time be any different.
What made the difference was I finally made up my mind and that I was going to lose the weight no matter how long it took me. I was in no hurry to lose the weight. I wanted to take my time, learn how to eat, what to eat, when to eat, what foods would help me in my weight loss, learning what good and bad carbs are, and how much I should have in the course of my day and so on. Im glad I took the time to learn about food because now instead of food taking over my life I have taken over it.
Ive taken charge of my body and I have learned to change the way I think about myself.
I had to first come to the place where I could stand in the miror at 420lbs and say I like what I see....Was not easy to do I had many many many cryiing sessions I could not bring myself to do that. I knew that the day I could it would be the day I could start the healing process of my self-hatred and from there it was one step at a time. I was patient with me and as the first 100lbs came off I joined my first gym and Ive been there for the past 2yrs now and loving every minute of it.
What I have to get used to now is this new life that has opened up for me that was not there when I was 420lbs. I could not walk and now I can walk anywhere. I am even running for the first time in 30yrs I am running!!!!! I can now walk into any store and buy an outfit no more buying out of big mens catalogs. Im even getting attention from men. Im so used to men not paying attention to me that when a man does I dont know what to do..(lol) its the funniest thing. I dont even know when Im getting hit on Im that clueless but Im learning, I have a few friends who are helping me along the way in this area.
For the first time in my life I am enjoying and excited about my life and its been an incredible journey a life changing journey and all I want to do is help those like me see that it is possible to lose the weight and give them the tools I was given to keep the weight off. I love people and I want to help them see there is a way out and give them hope that if I can do it so can they. With determination, discipline and a willingness to change this can be done. I have 70 more pounds to go, and I know Im going to make it. It has taken me 3yrs to lose 220lbs and I still have the same drive, determination and discipline to see the rest of the 65 pounds disappear.
Anyone who is reading this and feel you could use some help please feel free to write to me. I am always here ready and willing to see you through all of your struggles, fears and insecurities. Lets tackle this together you are not alone.
Much love to all