New form of cardio: Bat chasing

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Last night after our red-headed 5 year old, Dalia, got up for the umpteenth time, I finally told her she could sleep in our bed, even though I was still watching the Olympics. She and I are in bed and my husband's in the room working on his laptop when all of a sudden this bat comes out of nowhere. I yell, "There's a bat!" and pull the covers over Dalia and me as my husband bolts out of the room.

While calming Dalia down ("Yes, you're safe. Yes, bat's bite - but you're safe. No, we shouldn't wake your sisters up to tell them at this time ...), I peek out to see the bat flitting around in circles along the ceiling. I grab the phone from the nightstand and call to DH for a broom and the police non-emergency number just in case there's an animal patrol officer on duty at 11 pm. No dice. They can send a regular police officer but he’d just do what we would, i.e., try to guide the bat out an open window with a broom. I figure, why bother the police if we can do it ourselves?

In the meantime, DH has slid the broom under the door (my first clue that he had no intentions of re-entering the room). I put a pillow case over my head because I don’t quite remember if the thing about bats getting caught in hair is an old wives' tale and I’m not taking chances. By now the bat is hanging off the top of the closet door. I inch my way over to the window to remove the screen and then over to the broom (near the bat), pick the broom up, steel my nerves and whack! ... which sends the bat flying in circles again. Every time it circles near me, I swing the broom at it and try to guide it out the window yelling, "Out the window!" Dalia, still under the covers keeps chiming in, "Yeah bat, listen to Mama, fly out the window!" After, oh, 5 minutes of this, I'm getting a pretty good workout but the bat just doesn't get the idea to fly a bit lower so it can find, and use, the open window.

So I ask DH to grab another broom because maybe the two of us can guide the bat out. Response: "Uh, I'd better check that the chimney flue (in the living room) is closed in case that’s how the bat got in" Me: Huh? "You can do that later. Can you please grab another broom and come in here?" Him: “Actually, I have cold feet.” Points for honesty! So we call the police back. The first officer comes up wearing gloves and asking for a blanket to trap the bat in. By now, the bat is hanging off the louvered window shutters. After hemming an hawing and discussing rabies (modes of transmission, vaccination, etc.), he admits that he’s terrified and calls for his partner to come up. Wow, more points for honesty! The second officer comes up, sees our mesh pop-up laundry basket (wish I’d thought of that before calling the police), quickly catches the bat and shakes it out the window.

Needless to say, Dalia didn’t object to sleeping in her bed for the rest of the night!
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    We had the same thing happen to us when I was a kid. Sisters left a window open & the screen up to look at a bird's nest in the climbing rose bush up the arbor against the side of the house. They come screaming down the stairs: momma, there's a bat in the bedroom! My dad was working at night, grandma was staying with us, and mom called the fire department. You say you got bats in your belfry lady? (Ha!Ha!Ha!) Could be heard over the phone. Mom finally convinced them and they come. The fire chef & 2 young guys. They had a broom, a fishing net on a hoop, and a blanket. There was a cedar closet in the hallway right outside the bedroom with sliding doors on it. We heard a bunch of noise with the fire chef screaming, come outta there of that closet you cowards! Grandma offered to go up but mom said no and to stay put with us kids. Finally after what seemed like eternity they got the bat. Then when I went to school the next day, my friend told me that her father and a couple of guys went to some lady's house last night to get a bat out of the kids bedroom. Imagine my surprise and hers when I told her it was us. I had no idea her father was the fire chef of the local fire department. LOL! LOL! LOL! emoticon
    3570 days ago
    That was so funny. Thanks for giving me a laugh for the day.
    3570 days ago
    Hilarious!!! How did you enter it on your fitness tracking????? emoticon
    3570 days ago
    There sure are a lot of bat stories out there. The closest call I had was in elementary school and I was very content to just spend the rest of the day UNDER my desk!! Thanks again for sharing.
    3571 days ago
    What a great description ....you had me rolling on the floor!
    At our local Y a couple weeks ago a poor bat flew in the open doors and the desk person is deathly afraid, so there were all the swimmers with their towels chasing the bat to "net" it in a towel and do a quick release outside. HILARIOUS!
    3571 days ago
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