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What I realized about my Parents

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Well, I did a great thing tonight... instead of going out with the "Shot Pushing Guilt Trippers"..a.k.a. my friends..lol.. I opted to stay in tonight and hang out with my folks. The 20th was the 4 year anniversary of my mothers father passing away and we pretty much sat around, them drinking wine, me drinking decaf green tea..lol.. and telling stories of my grandpa, before grandkids and after..lol.. He was a funny guy... and my parents were clueless parents at first..lol.. which made my grandfather even funnier. We had a great time.

After both my parents went to sleep.. I realized just how lucky I am.. I have both parents still alive, they are still married, and they are still happy. I was able to hear stories that yes, I have heard before... but I also heard new stories.. funny ones, that I would have never pictured my parents doing. I realized, I think for the first time EVER, that my parents really were young once.. that they didnt always have kids... that they werent always married.... that my father lived for a FULL 30 years before I was even born...

I know that this probably sounds really weird.. me saying this... I mean, of corse they were young once, of corse they were not always married... but I never thought of it that way until tonight. I sound like an idiot..lol.. but I guess I have always just pictured my parents as the parents of me.. and not the people whom dated and lived lives before they had me..lol..

I dont know what brought on this "thing"..it is weird. I just feel a little depressed now... I dont know why.. well, I do know why... TOM.. but that is besides the point...lol.. I guess I just feel bad that it has taken me this long to realize that my parents are.. for lack of a better way to put it... just people. That they lived lives before me and that once they had my brothers and myself.. they sort of put their lives on hold and stopped being those 2 funny people I heard about tonight and became the people that I know them as..... aaaahhhh, I am sitting here frickin crying.... not that my parents arent fun.. because thay are, but thay have always been that, "This is my mom and dad and thay are funny".. not, " Hey, this is Sue and this is Larry and they are crackin me up!" I guess they decided when they said, ok lets keep her..lol.. to stop being Sue and Larry and become Mr. and Mrs. P.

I have to wonder though... do they regret having us so quickly... would they rather had waited a little longer to start our family so they could have spent more time as Sue and Larry instead of Mom and Dad?

I dont know.. I think I am just tired and OVERLY EMOTIONAL..lol..

I dont know... maybe I should have had a beer..lol..
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • FITTYTIFF
    Okay girl time to slap you around a bit! I know I can say that to you! But hey I agree with those below.
    Last night the 20th my husband and I celebrated our 16th wedding anniversary. We went to a fancy resturant and had a bottle of wine. Something we NEVER do. And then after wards we walked around laughed, and had fun great night! We do laugh with our daughter. You can not help it she makes us laugh. But yes last night was a different type of laugh. So Yes I know what you mean by you parents being funny in a way you do not reconize. My own daughter would not reconize that last night either.
    My belief is the key is balance. When you become a parent things do change! And you think and behave differently. But you are also willing to give up sooooo much. It is amazing the things I would give up for that kid and not regret it once. But as I said the key is balance! I am still Tiff, but I am also Mom and I am Mrs. E. Each person is me yet each person is a little different in their behavior. That is just part of growing up!
    Speaking as a parent don't worry yours are just fine! Speaking as also a daughter. Your right consider your self lucky you have them both. And even luckier that they let you in on seeing that other side we all have! That is very special. Enjoy it
    3678 days ago
  • 2BRUNNER
    One thing you might consider is that even though you think of them as just Mom and Dad, they may very well think of themselves as Sue and Larry, in addition to being your parents. They might just consider their lives full to the brim, and I'm sure they think of you and your siblings as the sugar that sweetens the whole cup.

    I don't know if you have children, but as a parent,
    I would encourage you not to take on this--as of this posting only imagined--guilt that you've somehow prevented them from living their lives. All of our lives change, sometimes for the better and sometimes not. Getting married, having children, suffering through the death of a parent, they are all steps along the way. If we don't have those experiences, then we don't have anything to laugh or cry about. Your parents can tell stories about your grandpa because he had your mom. You can tell funny stories about your parents because they had YOU! Rejoice in being part of that wonderful chain of funny, happy people.
    3679 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/21/2008 1:21:58 AM
  • RENA1965
    If anything was wrong with your parents having you kids early it would have happened for ages ago. They are doing okay so don't think over things that are not relevant now.. Like you said they are happy efter all these years, focus on this because you have what alot of other kids only wish for..
    3679 days ago
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