30,000-39,999 SparkPoints 37,497

Yep that about sums it up...!

With my 'baby' girl who is now a visit # 1 on the East Coast - New Hampshire 5.16

My 1st baby boy! He is a dude! When did he get this tall?! Now a Freshman 05.2016


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Well hello Spark's time to re-write this yet again.

Like all journeys in life, there are phases or steps that one goes through when navigating that journey. There are bad times, but there are so many good times and, if you are blessed enough, when you come to a clearing in your journey, you have learned something and are a better person for it...I have learned.

If you want to read my past intro, it's in my blog - in a nutshell it's this - I once had a life I was extremely happy in and my biggest worry was my weight - then, things happened, things I couldn't control and could never figure out how to navigate and my world turned upside down. Over the last several years I have lost my marriage and the life I thought I would give myself and my kids...I have struggled and hurt and been angry...and I have pushed through and grown stronger and healed. My clearing is here...

It's funny how I don't realize where I'm at in life, most times, until I'm through a stage. I'm learning to recognize and grasp my life, moment by moment, as they are here. Today, as I sit here in the 5 a.m. hour updating this, I'm happy.

Today I sit here, single, still with 3 beautiful children (just older children now :) One even had the balls to move away to chase her dreams at her dream school - good for her!), still working on my health journey, again smiling more than I frown, feeling amazing!

In the last few years I hit rock bottom, and then I started building my way up. I have learned to love myself. I have learned that the way that I talk to myself sets up how I feel. I have learned that if I do not like myself when I am alone, I can not possibly expect anyone else to like me. I have learned to love myself, even if I'm still working on me. I have learned that being able to be happy alone is a true blessing and a MUST in order to be able to truly be open to be with someone else. I have learned to take care of me, body yes, but also mind and soul and the rest of the world learns that you will take nothing less than respect, love and happiness from it.

Difficult times? Yes, there will always be those, but they get much easier when you are confident that the bad times are not permanent and they do not define who you are, they are a piece of life and an opportunity to learn. Also, the best things about difficult times, they make us appreciate the beset times. I work now to take in the difficult times, to embrace the crappy moments, to know that they will pass and some of the best are yet to come!

See, I've learned to live life. I've not become jaded, I stopped pushing others away, I've rediscovered parts of me that I had buried in order to heal. I have given myself permission to be nice to me and to embrace this crazy journey of life. I am happy.

This last Saturday (March 31st, 2018 - for the me that looks back and reads this 2 years from now) I was paid one of the best compliments. The compliment was simple, but it was from someone who has absolutely nothing to gain from complimenting me. This person is an important person in my son's life and, thus, in mine but only on the level that he cares for my son in a coach/mentor/idol (in my son's eyes) way. He is very happily married and I adore his wife too. His compliment was non prompted, it wasn't part of a conversation about health or weight loss, it was simply a question and statement that was real and honest in the moment - and I'm quite glad he had the gall to ask given that a guy asking this kind of thing of a woman can be dangerous! :) He said to me "You're looking great! Have you lost weight?" This while I'm sitting at an 8 a.m. Saturday baseball practice with mini piggy tails in my hair under a hat because, well, 8 a.m. baseball practice on a Saturday! I smiled and told him how I'm the heaviest I've been since starting to lose weight 9 years ago (he's known me for 3 years). He told me that I looked like I was losing weight and looked great. I thought for a minute and said, "I'm happy - I'm the happiest I've been in the last several years." He smiled and told me it looked good on me...and isn't it great when they happy inside starts shining on the outside?

Life will not be perfect...but it certainly can be great...and I type that as I'm starting day 4 with no soda and have a headache I'm not looking forward to battling today - but I woke up far, so have all my loved ones...I have a new day to make the best I can, to smile, to laugh, to think, and to cry...

I think Jimmy V said it the very best as he stood on a stage just days before he died, knowing he was dying but living in that moment anyway when he said:

“To me there are three things everyone should do every day. Number one is laugh. Number two is think -- spend some time time in thought. Number three, you should have your emotions move you to tears. If you laugh, think and cry, that's a heck of a day.”

So - welcome to my page now - I'm battling back in my health journey and I'll have ups and downs, but the goal is more ups than downs - wait - with weight maybe that's more downs than ups! :) And I'm walking with purpose and appreciation through this life - taking in all the good I can, working through the difficult and enjoying the journey. Hugs and loves friends!

Member Since: 2/14/2009

Fitness Minutes: 108,803

My Goals:
My goals...

*Be happy
*Laugh way more than I cry
*Get my FEISTY back - I miss my feisty! (even if it is inappropriate at times :) )
*Make it back to size 8 - actual size 8, not squeeze in to 8s
*Weight Loss goal - I will make them, but if I hit an 8 without hitting these numbers then I'm ok with that too...means I'm fit and strong and that's what I want:
06.01.2016 - 168lbs (if I stay what I am now)
07.01.2016 - 165lbs
08.01.2016 - 162lbs
09.01.2016 - 159lbs (150s!! YAY)
10.01.2016 - 156lbs
11.01.2016 - 153lbs
12.01.2016 - 150lbs (I will be 40 on December 3rd!)
01.01.2017 - 147lbs
02.01.2017 - 143lbs GOAL!! This is where my body wants to be!!
I want to be between 140 and 143 or MOST IMPORTANT a strong and fit size 8

My Program:
This is where I struggle! I can put in all my nutrition and make my goals and not lose anything...its probably because of what I like to eat. I don't, and never have, completely deprived myself of anything, but I really love Pepsi (yes I KNOW how horrible that is) and cake! I'm working on it.

I guess my program is to stay in my nutritional range and make my goals for fitness and adjust if no results are happening!

Personal Information:
Name is Sandi and I'm from Omaha, Ne. I love sports...the Cubs and the Steelers are my teams!! I have 3 amazing kids! There is never a dull moment around our house! I have the most awesome 17 year old girl who is totally sure of what she wants to do with her life and is lining things up to make that happen (which includes me sending her to the East Coast for college!), a 14 year old who boy who has a heart of gold for everyone (except his younger normal) and an 8 year old I'm sure was born a 30 year old who is too smart for his own good (and obsessed with rubiks cubes!)...they make me a better person each day (and some days make me want to eat really bad things for stress relief! :)

I'm figuring out how to get the parts back of me that I've let stress take away. I want my inappropriateness back, my feisty back, my truly enjoying my life back. I own that and I am starting to really own that! I can and WILL do it!

Other Information:
I am a boy band freak!! I love the Backstreet Boys and's sad I know :) I think Nick Carter and Donnie Wahlberg are 2 of the sexiest men alive...I am also a country in country music...I don't want to live in the country...but I do enjoy visiting my in laws who live in the quiet country...I just need to know that I have a 24 hour Wal-Mart near by if I should ever need it! :)

I love baseball (GO CUBS!!) and Football (GO HUSKERS & BRONCOS!). I'm a color guard, ROTC (coming soon!) and baseball mom and sometimes I love that...ok almost all the time but 2 hour baseball practices can get a little yawn worthy when you are just waiting to take your kiddo home...but seeing him love playing makes it SO worth it!

I have a handful of amazing friends I trust with my life...they are family and I'm SO blessed to have them. I also have an amazing Sister and Brother in Law (BIL) and Brother as well as nieces who are gifts I treasure!

I love to speak in front of peo

Read More About SANDIK9806 - Profile Information moved here. (Updated April 4)

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