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My hubby and I on our 10th anniversary

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My family on mine and my husbands 10 year anniversary. The same place we got married.

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I am 32 years old and a mother to two beautiful children. My husband and I have been happily married for 10 amazing years. I have started over more times than I can count and I am done. I want to be healthy. I want to be happy. I want to be comfortable in my own skin. I want to be able to play with my children.

I picked my username because the color blue symbolizes freedom. Freedom from my old life. Freedom from my weight holding me back. The Phoenix symbolizes rebirth and rising from the ashes.

Starting weight is 175 pounds and goal weight is 115 pounds. I do not have the extra money for a gym membership (although I do enjoy the occasional Zumba or Piloxing class) so the majority of my workouts will be done at home.

I have struggled with my weight for the last 13 years. When I graduated from high school I weighed 123 pounds and wore a size 4. Then my husband and I started dating and by our first anniversary I had gained 20 pounds and was wearing a (uncomfortably tight) size 9. Over the years I gained more weight, and in 2004 I decided enough was enough. I had hit 160 pounds (on my 4'11" frame) and decided I was going to make changes. I lost 25 pounds over the next year and then got pregnant with my daughter. After she was born I got back down to my pre-pregnancy weight. In 2008 I got pregnant with my son, and I am still struggling to lose that weight now. I am currently 175 pounds with an ultimate goal weight of 115. That number is not set in stone. I know that as I progress on my journey I will change my mindset, and I want to be strong and have muscle, not just be skinny, so maybe as I get closer I will be happy with 125 pounds. I just have to wait and see.

I grew up in an alcoholic household and am the oldest of four girls. As the oldest I have a hard time taking care of me. I always want to care for others. My youngest sister is only 15 and since my parents split up and my mom still drinks way too much my sister spends a lot of time with my family. I also struggle with a mild case of depression. I have tried anti-depressants, but I don't like the way they make me feel - all fuzzy and kind of like I'm just floating through. I would love to get this under control with diet, exercise, and regular counseling sessions.

Get out of the 170's - DONE!!! 169.8 on 7/27/12
Get out of the 160's
Get out of the 150's
Get out of the 140's
Get out of the 130's
Get out of the 120's
Complete C25K
Complete a 5k race
Run in a 5k race
Complete a 5k in under 45 minutes
Complete a 5k in under 40 minutes
Complete a 5k in under 35 minutes
Complete a 5k in under 30 minutes
Wear my favorite size 10 dress pants
Wear a size 8
Wear a size small
Have boudoir photographs taken to give my husband
Have someone ask if I have lost weight - DONE! 8/2/2012
Become a Sparkpeople Motivator
Write a popular blog post
Complete 30 Day Shred

Member Since: 7/7/2012

Fitness Minutes: 1,765

My Goals:
I want to feel sexy.
I want my kids to be proud of me.
I want to be free of everything that is holding me back right now.
I want to be a role model for my family.

My Program:
Walking, Zumba, Piloxing, Strength Training

Personal Information:
I live in a small town in NY. I am a SAHM mom and a family/portrait photographer.

Other Information:

Read More About BLUEPHOENIX80 - Profile Information moved here. (Updated August 2)

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My Ticker:
 current weight: 170.2 
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  • v BOOSMOM03
    Looks like you found me. :)
    2589 days ago
  • v BGAIL521
    Hope your Labor Day is great!
    2603 days ago
  • v PATTIE441
    I just wanted to tell you how awesome you are! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2626 days ago
  • v MAMAGIRL35
    The first paragraph of your introduction totally described me! It is such a relief to find like minded people; I don't feel so alone in this. I signed up for Spark around the same time you did but just dove into it this weekend. It is amazing to see how many fitness minutes you've gotten in in the meantime!
    2636 days ago
  • v NEELOJ
    Welcome to shutterbugs….
    Hi!! So glad you joined us in our Shuttlebug team!
    We have so much fun on this team. We love to share our photos with each other and to comment on them.

    Just for fun we post weekly photo assignments. You are invited to participate in this with us if you are interested.

    Please check in the General Discussion section for the Photo Assignments.
    Each assignment has complete directions in the very first post of the assignment which will be on page one, scroll to the bottom of the page.
    You are welcome to add pictures to any of the assignments.
    Or just add a comment to pictures other team members have shared.

    If you have any questions be sure and ask, either on a team or you are welcome to email me.
    I will be looking forward to seeing your photos!!

    2639 days ago
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