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MIAMIRN SparkPoints: (81,804)
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2/16/14 9:31 P

Hi everyone! emoticon

I am a grandma. and a RN. I have a grandson with very high functioning Autism who was overly nurtured by his mom partly due to lack of education and partly from feeling guilt having a disabled child. One of my children has Asperger's (very high functioning Autism). One of the characteristics of many children with Autism is they have a high sensitivity to smells and tastes. Nevertheless I have always believed in not coddling my children/grandchild. I raised my children to eat what was on their plate. If they didn't eat it, they would not eat anything else and have to wait until the next meal or the next day if it was dinner. It has always worked for me. Children do as they are taught. Who is the boss anyway? is my motto. If you have healthy food in the kitchen and you are the queen of your kitchen the children have no choice then to obey your rules. When it came to my grandson, my daughter coddled him to the point he would gag at new foods. But when he came to my house, he would try and act this way, but he didn't have a choice, but to eat at my house or not until he got home. There were many a time when this would happen. He knew how to manipulate his mom. Not for a bad purpose, but because he wanted to do what he thought was right. He thought I was wrong. Well, that was until he became an athlete/swimmer. He's 11 and swims 2 hours a day 6 days a week and runs 2 miles three times a week after doing stretch cords. He has a passion for going to the 2020 Olympics. He's a good swimmer, but this year he's been growing a lot and is not eating any different than the last two years, not so great! He's fit and trim, but could use the extra energy. I have taught he and his mother the best I know about nutrition and good eating habits. It's just been recently my daughter has finally come around. Without back-up from her, it's hard to be a united front in changing my grandson's habits. He is finally coming around, too. She is following her upbringing in regards to eating habits and not giving in. No more desert if he doesn't finish his meal. No more high carb meals and she's cooking home cooked foods, finally! I'm thrilled. So, it's taken years, but it's actually happening! My grandson is trying all sorts of new foods and actually liking some of them. I asked him, how is he supposed to know what he likes if he doesn't have a broad spectrum of foods that he eats? He has nothing to compare one food to the other. So he's eating food and liking it better. To summarize: Be a united front, don't ask, serve and be the boss, by all means serve foods that they like, but serve all kinds of foods and groups at each meal. One thing I haven't mentioned is rewards. Do reward your children with non-food rewards. Praise them, give them money, do whatever works, but reward them for good behavior. Don't dote on them and be all negative and shake your head when they give you a hard time. Just smile and go about your own routine.

I didn't mean to go on so long. I just wanted to share what I have learned. I hope you all have success with your children. May the Lord give us the strength to endure with a smile and a chuckle. Lol. emoticon

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2/2/14 8:41 P

I have 4 little ones, so I know the battle well. What I started doing was serving them what I made along with at least one thing on their plate that I know they will eat. And yes, it's usually a carb. My 8 & 9 year old have to try everything on their plate. My 4 year-old is still very resistant, but she's starting to try and like new things. My 2 year-old is a good eater - Thank the Lord! It's been a slow process, but it's working. And I know that they are getting some healthy food down, even if it is just a few bites at a time. Also, if they eat all their carb and are still hungry, they can have a piece of fruit.

1/28/14 2:14 P

As a mom I step back sometimes and ask myself " what is my job here?" Answer: To provide nutritious foods and be the example I want them to see. If you ask me your job is done as far as foods go.
Over the years I have tried some things to build interest in foods they normally don't like. Having an Asian meal with chopsticks or eating by candlelight and we have even had a "green feast" where they all picked something green in the produce section that they like and something new to try. We make a hodge-podge meal from these foods. Taking the focus off the food and having a fun experience where food is part of that seems to help expand their culinary horizons!

DEELIBRARIAN SparkPoints: (139)
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1/28/14 10:07 A

I thought I was the only one! At first I was stressed over my 6 year old daughter not eating my cooking and I would try to appease and make her something else. However, I am now on a budget to get out of debt so eating what I make is the only option. I've found that she'll eat what I cook if she gets hungry enough and that's that. I don't feel bad anymore because I do my best and work hard for us to have healthy meals-- so I tell myself, "You've done you're motherly duties." Then, I move on to something else. :) Good luck everyone!

AMANDAMF05 SparkPoints: (1,045)
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1/24/14 4:34 A

My mother always made me something else if I did not want to eat what she made. Honestly, I think this made me not appreciate her as much, and made things so much harder on her. Now that I have children I have had to go through this as well. My oldest son refused to eat meats the first 4 years of his life, so if I made a meal with meat in it I would either pick it out for him or make him something else. When my husband(his step dad) and I moved in together he was in shock seeing me pick hamburger chunks out of hamburg helper. Hahaha! He said no more. So he told my son "Your mommy worked hard cooking dinner, she shouldn't have to make you more or take time to pick meat out. Eat what she gives you, or what until your next meal or snack." At first I felt like I was starving my child, but as his doctor told me "unless he is skin and bones, skipping a meal would not hurt him. He will eat it when he is hungry." And within two days my son was eating everything on his plate, or at least trying all the foods. =)

1/23/14 2:44 P

My oldest daughter is 15 and convinced that I can't cook at all. My sister (her aunt) is a great cook - she is a caterer and chef and my daughter is always telling me to learn from her. So what do I do? I learn from her and make a recipe of hers which to everyone else in my family tastes great, just like my sister's. Except for my daughter - it tastes terrible to her and I'm still an awful cook. I am absolutely convinced that if I brought home her favorite food from her favorite restaurant and pretended that I made it, she would say it was terrible! That's 15 for you! The only thing she will eat are the veggies, and she always complains that I don't make enough (no, she is not anorexic). Of course I can't get my 12 year old to eat veggies...

MICHELLEXXXX SparkPoints: (12,229)
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1/23/14 1:04 P

I agree Ashley; I have seen this with my nephew. After a couple times, he realized his dad was serious and he started trying new things. He even loves asparagus now.

FURKIDS123 SparkPoints: (1,757)
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11/30/13 6:39 A

I thought my daughter was the only one with this kind of attitude towards food. shes the same way! if she cant identify it she will not touch it. I mean we had an issue with spaghetti which she loves and goolash which is the same thing different noodles, she wouldnt touch it to save her life. now she will thank god. She is like this with alot of food!! It makes it really hard to make some meals! She eats healthy but its getting her to try ANYTHING new....its like pulling teeth. I dont think I should have to make seperate meals just because she cant id it. Tacos... simple meat lettuce and cheese in a shell she only wants just the meat.. nothing else. I finally got her to try steamed brocholi come to find out she loves it same with hazelnut. She will not eat any condiments no katchup or ranch nothing! I rather pull teeth. But then she comes to me and says mom hummus is good. Hummus?? Ive never even tried hummus, when did she try it??
wish there was an easier way

Edited by: FURKIDS123 at: 11/30/2013 (06:43)
MRS.DR.SHOT Posts: 197
11/18/13 7:20 P

If they don't like what I made, they can make a PB&J.

CLARK971 SparkPoints: (29,686)
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10/26/13 8:31 A

My kids always have the option of making themselves a sandwich if they don't like what I made. If they aren't hungry, they sit at the table and talk with us, but they don't have to eat.

Are your kids snacking close to meal time or filling up on milk so they aren't really hungry at meal time? When my children were smaller they ate smaller portions than adults.

When you say all they want are carbs-do you mean things like chips? If so, could you replace those with a healthy carb alternative?

ASHLEYAMBER0710 Posts: 244
10/25/13 1:13 P

Our rule is if you don't eat what is served you don't eat. Although if they pick a healthy alternative I don't fight. I think so many people are overly concerned that their kids aren't eating enough. The truth is in this day and age they have so much exposure to food that missing a meal out of purely being stubborn will not harm them.

My oldest is a very picky child. At least once a week he goes to bed without having supper and he is just as healthy as my other two. But different things work for different people. Hope you got some insight that works for you.

SUNSET09 SparkPoints: (543,551)
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10/24/13 5:32 A

Have them "help" you fix the meals and see what happens. Maybe they will eat their "own" cooking. It's worth a try! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

ANJAG4 Posts: 42
10/18/13 11:34 P

Theres out there just like me...I thought I was the only one with children that hated my cooking.

SARAHMO4 Posts: 336
10/14/13 7:33 A

I am not sure but if they have been given another option or meal after saying no or refusing it could just be kids knowing what buttons to push. Kids are very aware of what they need to do to get in or out of anything, including meals that may be good, but they know they will get another option if they say no, argue, etc.

KAYMAXIM SparkPoints: (0)
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10/12/13 10:17 A

Great idea! Getting them involved in cooking would be great. A cooking class might be even better if kids resist what their parents want them to learn. Then it would be their thing.

JACOBSBELOVED SparkPoints: (0)
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10/11/13 5:59 P

What if you got them involved in cooking the meal? Maybe if they participated then they would know what's going into the food, they'll take pride in making it, and you can bond with them. Might be worth a try, right?

LOVE4KITTIES Posts: 4,690
9/23/13 2:38 P

What do you mean when you say your kids want to "load up on carbs?" Are you offering them low carb meals/want them to eat low carb and they want carbs? Or, do you mean you are offering them the recommended amount of carbs and they want to eat a bunch of candy and chips?

KAYMAXIM SparkPoints: (0)
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9/22/13 1:15 A

Hey that's what kids do. I just didn't have any junk in the house. So they didn't have another option.

JENNILACEY SparkPoints: (81,972)
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9/20/13 12:57 P

How old are your children?

I have younger children and they *will not*, all 3 of them (ages 3-6) eat any sort of meal they can't identify. What I mean is; anything mixed together, anything complex, multiple ingredients, etc. What they will eat is a lot of the ingredients from my meals. For example, if I make a chicken casserole they'll snub it BUT if I just give them the chicken, corn, broccoli separately without any sauce, they eat it.

Sometimes it just takes quite a few tries for them to accept something new.

Edited by: JENNILACEY at: 9/20/2013 (12:57)
BRENNA84 SparkPoints: (54,570)
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9/16/13 8:00 P

give them rice with a tiny bit of chicken stir-fry.

if they won't eat lots of veggies and meat, give them mostly carbs, and then a tiny bit of veggies and meat.

and maybe they prefer more bland foods?

I hope it helps.

progress not perfection

SUPERSYLPH Posts: 1,300
9/16/13 6:21 P

Wow, that's a tough one. The only thing I could think of is to try different recipes or substitute ingredients they don't like.

9/9/13 12:56 P

Help!! I make great food, according to my kids friends and family... So why are MY kids not eating my food. Everyone but my kids eat my food... all they want is to load up on Carbs. What do I do...

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