ONE DAY AND ONE STEP AT A TIME IS ALL WE CAN DO AND COME HERE AND VENT AND TALK ABOUT OUR DAY AND LISTEN AND HELP EACH OTHER WE ARE ALL HERE FOR THE SAME REASON AND WILL DO THIS WE ARE WORTH IT.
7/26/13 9:00 A
Hi Hungry Jess
Sorry things haven't been so easy with your dad, especially as you clearly love him and have a good relationship with him normally.
I was bothered that you're hungry all the time. Have you got your calorie range set too low? I changed the range that SP set me because I've lost weight loads of times and put it back on again, so I decided to go for a lifestyle change rather than a weight loss programme. (I am losing weight - have lost 44 lb over 2 and a half years. I know that's slow compared to others, but I'm doing something sustainable. Some days I manage below about 1600 cals, but so long as I don't go above 1900 I don't worry too much.)
I made a great discovery this week - something I can't do every day but it worked well for me. 2 Cumberland sausages and an egg fried in Olive Oil for breakfast - 389 cals, a real treat (especially as it feels off limits) and kept me going easily till lunchtime. I decided that, so long as I compensate for the fat in my other meals, this is a good breakfast for me.
Is there a tendency to punish yourself by going hungry as well as by binging on the wrong stuff when you're upset?
By the way, it's no wonder you couldn't work on your thesis when you were upset - that would have been a complete waste of time and effort. Going to sleep was probably a great idea!!
Fitness Minutes: (74,443)
3,293 7/25/13 7:40 P
When I am angry or stressed out, I exercise!
I jump in the pool and swim with righteous indignation. I go lift weights until I am tired or I just walk and listen to happy music until I am in a better mood. I also dance because it makes me happy.
What kinds of things do you do for exercise? It sounds like just getting out of the house a bit more might help, and exercise can facilitate that.
Fitness Minutes: (280)
7/25/13 1:08 P
Thanks everyone for your kind words and suggestions on how to de-stress and not take my anger out with food.
And Lilliputianna, I do track my calories, but all but one time (I just started tracking so it's only a few days of tracking I've done) have I eaten within my recommended intake...I think. Although, I haven't tracked my calories lately because Sunday I went to a buffet and Monday I was really upset and ate too much. So I was in a kind of "ignorance is bliss" rut. I still am. I'm nervous to track my calories today. And it's only 10!!!
7/25/13 11:54 A
Are you tracking your calories here on SP?
You said you're hungry all the time...are you getting enough to eat even when you're not angry?
Fitness Minutes: (301,178)
7/25/13 5:05 A
Hi, Jess !
I'm a big believer that stress is a neglected aspect of weight gain. If a person could reduce their stress, they'd automatically reduce their waistline.
I'm sorry you're having problems with your father. These things do happen in all families, so don't beat yourself up. But, one thing you do have to consider is finding ways to vent your stress that don't involve food. There really are lots of better things you could do. Take a walk. Walking is not only great cardiovascular exercise, it's a great way to reduce stress. sit and drink a cup of tea. listen to some relaxing music. take a bubble bath.
And have you ever tried yoga ? If you've never tried yoga, I'm going to encourage you to start. don't do a DVD, you need to start with a class if you've never done it before. yoga isn't just about being more flexible. a good yoga class will teach you some basics of meditation as well as deep breathing. People knock deep breathing. Don't. Studies have shown that meditation and breathing exercises can not only reduce a person's stress, it can lower their blood pressure too.
So, instead of turning to food for comfort, turn to something else like yoga, walking, drinking tea, listening to music, painting, how about knitting ? doing crafts is another way to keep your hands and mind focused. You need to redirect your focus and energies. If you can do that, you'll find that the emotional eating will decrease.
Try keeping a journal of how you feel when you eat. It may sound silly at first, but stopping to write it down before you eat it will make you more self-aware of these things, in particular whether or not you are actually hungry when you're eating. I've been where you are, and I've successfully overcome emotional eating. It takes being absolutely honest with yourself and making the effort to decide NOT to eat when you realize that you are not actually hungry. It doesn't matter how much you want that thing; if you are not hungry, you can eat it later on, when you ARE really, truly hungry. Start there; don't worry so much right now about what it is that you are eating, just focus on your hunger levels. Remind yourself that whatever it is you're wanting will still be there when you are hungry. It helps to distract yourself. Go take a short walk or pick up a book. Or go work on your thesis. Pop in a movie. Call a friend. Go to the mall and walk around. Anything to get your mind off eating. It's a way of training yourself to turn to things other than food when you're feeling down/sad/angry/bored/depressed/etc. It gets easier the more you do it, I promise. Now, whenever I'm feeling depressed (something else I've had to deal with all my life), I tend to exercise, which is a habit I tend to stick with! As an added bonus, I'm usually ravenous after my workouts, so if I was craving a food before, I can eat it after working out, b/c then I am legitimately hungry and not just eating my emotions. You CAN do this. Feel free to message me if you need to talk.
Fitness Minutes: (74,005)
1,546 7/24/13 10:28 P
You seem to have a lot of anger directed at yourself. It reminds me of the time that I ate a whole family sized bar of marzipan chocolate because I was so mad at my husband. After I ate it I realized I was only hurting myself. I decided to stop punishing myself for being angry and instead work on controlling my anger and channeling it into healthier outlets. I started practising karate and six years later I got a black belt. Not saying that works for everybody, but learning to kick butt in a safe environment has certainly helped me.
Fitness Minutes: (280)
7/24/13 9:13 P
I'm really dealing with a problem. I emotional eat like nobody's business. Lately I've been getting into arguments and having words with my father. He and I have a great relationship but here and there we have serious fights, where we're yelling at each other and I'm crying. Lately, he's been more prickly. I think there's been a lot of friction between us lately.
A couple of days ago, my dad and I got into a fight. I started crying and went to sleep (instead of working on my senior thesis, another unhealthy habit of mine) and I eat.
I eat for two reasons during that time. One: "Who cares? I'm sad!" which is connected to "I'm angry. Screw the world. F*** you! I'm pissed off. I don't care. I'm going to eat." It's almost like I'm eating for revenge.
I have other reasons to eat. I'm super hungry all the time. But I think emotional eating is one way to cut calories out of my diet.
I just don't know how to relax and say no. I've never been one of those people that says I need a lifestyle change. I've always been mad that I'm fat, and hate looking at myself in the mirror when I change my clothes in the morning. I've never been one of those people who uses reverse psychology aka: "You think I can't do it? Well, I'm going to prove you wrong!" But, maybe I need to start acting like that, because the way I'm going, I'm only gaining weight and not losing it.