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MJEFFERSON23 SparkPoints: (32,691)
Fitness Minutes: (16,395)
Posts: 1,280
5/8/14 9:11 A

A family member once said to me, as if very offended, "You didn't tell ME you were on a diet!"
I didn't know I needed their permission!

5/7/14 6:30 P

Any remarks that address my body. You don't see men commenting "Have you lost weight?" or "Careful, that muffin will go straight to your hips".
Come on ladies, we have more worth than our physical appearances ;)

BARBZUMBA SparkPoints: (14,452)
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Posts: 20,419
5/7/14 11:41 A

Coworker commented....Oh..see that you are losing weight....May be you can wear
"normal" clothes soon.

CARTOON3 SparkPoints: (36,264)
Fitness Minutes: (14,372)
Posts: 2,677
5/6/14 4:15 P

I have 3 sisters I am the tallest and the heaviest. I am 5'5" and my sisters are shorter than 5'1". But everytime I see them they will say wow you have really gotten fat, even if I am the same weight they seen me at last. They also comment that they are healthier than I am because they are skinny. They all smoke and drink alot of alcohol which I don't do either. I recently had my labs drawn and my labs are all good. I've tried to tell them being skinny isn't necessarily healthy.

5/6/14 3:58 P

I have been battling my weight for my entire life, and I have heard everything in the book. I have gotten pretty thick skinned about most things people say. There are three things though, that really bother me a lot.
The first is when I have been working really hard, and have lost quite a bit of weight, and not a single word is said to me about it. The last time this happened, I hadn't seen my family in OK for almost 6 months, and I had lost almost 50 pounds. When I got home, the people who I thought would be most proud (parents and siblings), acted as if they didn't even notice. That hurt.
The second thing is when I am around a certain woman, and she makes comments like "If you feel like you want dessert, just tell yourself that it won't taste as good as being thin feels". Ummm, if it were that simple, I would be at my goal weight by now. My obesity is caused by a food addiction, so little quotes do not help at all. I know it's being suggested with good intentions, but for goodness sakes.
The third is being told that "there is no such thing as being addicted to food".

5/6/14 1:50 P

Or my mom saying you gotta lose that weight.Oh no no no no.

Thanks for stating the obvious

5/6/14 1:47 P

You could eat more! This is in regards to not cleaning my plate. I'm done which I find is okay to make a conscious decision on saving the rest for later and not OVER eating. And I just wanna say Son of a whose iz whats it

RIET69 SparkPoints: (47,087)
Fitness Minutes: (11,285)
Posts: 3,116
5/6/14 11:52 A

"All that swimming you do is not helping you very much."

ALILNH Posts: 1,370
5/6/14 11:27 A

Any one, but especially a family member, who recommends a diet plan to me. They just don't understand that there is so much more to being fat than just eating. There are emotional issues, of which THEY are probably part of, that go along with being overweight. Deciding to change lifestyles is a choice only I can make. It cannot come because someone else thinks I need to do it.

On the other side of things, I think the lack of comments when I have done well, also hurts. That's part of my emotional baggage though so maybe it doesn't bug other people when no one notices the hard work you've put in.

MISSRUTH Posts: 4,312
5/6/14 11:03 A

I'd have to say that none of that kind of stuff upsets me. Because I just figure, 1) they have no idea what they're talking about, and 2) it's none of their business anyway. To the food pushers, I just generally say "no thanks, I just ate". And to the ones who ask about how I eat, I just say I eat a healthy, well-balanced diet. And to the ones who say "you don't know what it's like to try to lose weight" (these would be people who haven't known me long, because everybody else knows I've struggled with my weight all my life) I don't say anything because 1) and 2). My weight, how I eat, and my health and fitness are my business and my doctors' business. And that's it. I really don't care what anybody else thinks or what they might say. By the same token, I never say anything about anyone else's choices. Not my business.

My DH has never said anything... but if I was working on a healthy lifestyle change and he made a hurtful comment, I'd be sure to speak up and let him know I thought the comment was hurtful, and why. The weight doesn't come off overnight.

EABHA70 SparkPoints: (62,065)
Fitness Minutes: (40,967)
Posts: 1,121
5/6/14 10:25 A

"Oh, come on! One isn't going to hurt you!"

Which is true. But people who wonder why I won't have just one cookie or brownie or whatever don't realize that my day is filled with food choices, not just the one they're forcing me to make at that moment. And I need to balance all of these choices. I cannot say yes every time.

5/6/14 10:10 A

In regards to my physique; I just blogged about my buddy calling me Musclely McMuscles during our gaming night. It was all in good fun, I think.

The other is when CLEARLY I look like I work out and someone makes the snarky remark that maybe I ought to try working out to get in better shape.

SBURDEN Posts: 11,380
5/6/14 9:18 A

you are so small you wouldn't know what it is like to battle flash, I had to work to get down to this size!

TRYINGHARD54 Posts: 5,292
5/6/14 5:55 A

oh you look different.. ha ! not in a good way either.

LULUBELLE65 SparkPoints: (37,106)
Fitness Minutes: (27,770)
Posts: 1,169
5/6/14 5:49 A

I try to assume positive intentions. So if someone says that I shouldn't eat something, or makes a comment about how I look, I assume that their goal is to be positive and that they have just done something awkward rather than unkind.

If it is someone who is consistently rude, I will sometimes say, "Can you please explain to me what you meant by that? Because I am sure that you did not mean to be as rude at that appeared" Or, "Why in the world would you say that?" Generally people stutter and stammer and backtrack and avoid saying things in the future.

I think in general though, it is better to avoid toxic people than engage with them. You are the person who decides if you are upset or not. Why let them get to you?

BETTERME8913 SparkPoints: (5,341)
Fitness Minutes: (747)
Posts: 824
5/5/14 11:47 P

A coworker known for being rude, knowing I was trying to be good and lose weight, shook a ziploc bag of homemade cookies right in my face, and said you want some, you want some of these, come on I know you do. What a devil, lol! She should have horns on her forehead, lol! The next fat roll will look better on her and not me, right. I just said no thanks, did she have to put it right in my face and shake it, though - grrr!

JO88BAKO SparkPoints: (319,607)
Fitness Minutes: (174,617)
Posts: 17,165
5/5/14 11:36 P

You're still trying to lose

JANIEWWJD SparkPoints: (598,750)
Fitness Minutes: (356,687)
Posts: 17,051
5/5/14 11:09 P

You're so skinny!!!

5/5/14 10:55 P

When I'm eating right, losing weight, and going nice and steady and I'm so happy and my spouse says "I'm worried about your health, you need to lose weight". Makes me want to stab him with a fork.

LADYREDCOMET SparkPoints: (110,822)
Fitness Minutes: (52,383)
Posts: 2,411
5/5/14 10:41 P

"Oh, you're eating such a healthy snack again! You're making the rest of us look bad!"

Hate the implication that good health is a contest and that my choices are made solely to make others somehow "look bad" by comparison.

TACDGB Posts: 6,136
5/5/14 10:29 P

You are too skinny...

MAY170 SparkPoints: (3,321)
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Posts: 120
5/5/14 10:17 P

Sometimes a poster will not give enough info to base a opinion, so other member need to "Assume" what the op meant. I found most here are brutally Honest! As far as diet advice, many posters do different plans/exercise that work for them and Willing to Share.. But isn't that what SP is about?!

Edited by: MAY170 at: 5/5/2014 (22:19)
MJEFFERSON23 SparkPoints: (32,691)
Fitness Minutes: (16,395)
Posts: 1,280
5/5/14 9:26 P

I hate it when people say things like; , "I don't like online sites like Spark People" "You don't need to lose anymore", "You should do this or that exercise", "What diet are you on? Oh, I don't like that one" and other rude remarks and unsolicited advice. What remarks make you upset?

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