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SEAJESS Posts: 3,830
2/12/12 3:05 P

Thanks for reminding me of a trick that works for me. When your monkey mind starts chattering at you with those mean (and untrue) thoughts, think of a child you love. For me it's my nephew Max. Imagine how you would talk to and be with that beloved child. Then visualize yourself as that child and step into those feelings. I love this 'cause when I get into self-hating it's impossible for me to think myself out of it directly. But connecting to existing feelings of love is easy.

If a child doesn't work for you, think of a beloved animal.

One (gentle) day at a time, my friend!

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (201,343)
Fitness Minutes: (301,253)
Posts: 27,435
2/12/12 2:57 P

Hi, TINK !

A person should never feel guilty for eating a little too much or missing a workout. You're not perfect. NO ONE is perfect ! You don't have to be perfect to be healthy. And I think that's why so many people beat up on themselves. They have what they consider a slip up and the next thing you know, the world is crashing down around them. Well, good health doesn't work like that.

There will be days you miss your workout. There will be days when you may eat a little more than you'd like. You know what ? You'll still be a healthy person if you miss a day here or there. We all have negatives in our lives. While it would be great if we could eliminate them all, that's pretty impossible. The goal we should strive for is having the positives outnumber the negatives.

So, try not to beat on yourself if you miss a workout or have a slice of pizza occasionally. Spark People isn't about deprivation. It's all about moderation.

2/12/12 2:30 P

I love the woman who writes the blog, "Already Pretty" she has a lot of wonderful words about loving your body as it is now. I highly recommend reading her stuff.

SP_COACH_NANCY SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (112,042)
Posts: 46,222
2/12/12 1:42 P


So glad to hear you are going back to your therapist. He/she will be in the best position to guide you through this process of accepting where you are in your life at this moment.

Sometimes when we focus too much on our weight and not our health, it's very difficult to focus on the natural swing of our weight from day to day. When we take the focus off the scale (which we cannot control) and place it on embracing healthy habits, amazing things can happen.

I wish you well!

Coach Nancy

MBHRD27 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (2,244)
Posts: 114
2/12/12 12:16 P

I glad you recovered. But you still need to learn to have a better relationship with food. It's ok to miss a work out and if you have a bad day, find other ways of coping. You will find healthy ways to get back on track, but also, lean to accept yourself and know you are beautiful.

TINK2587 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (600)
Posts: 1
2/12/12 11:49 A

Hey y'all,

I'm new to Spark but I've been struggling for a while. Over the years I've struggled on and off with anorexia and bulimia. Now, though, I'm at the heaviest I've ever been. I'm going back to my therapist and seeking help, and I found a friend to be accountable to and workout with (we're starting our first workout together tomorrow!), but I'm stuck emotionally.

I feel like such a failure for letting myself get to this point, and I don't know how to deal with the fact that I only have a few outfits, because almost nothing in my closet fits. How do I accept and love myself when I'm not comfortable where I am physically? I know this is something that I'm working through, but I don't know if any of y'all can relate and have any words of wisdom.

And how do I get past the mentality that if I miss a workout or have a bad day that I shouldn't give in to the temptation and just go all out on a binge?

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