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SUITABLE Posts: 5,959
3/25/13 11:57 P


JANIEWWJD SparkPoints: (597,266)
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Posts: 17,003
3/25/13 11:47 P

Be a good listener!!!!

BLUENOSE63 SparkPoints: (108,021)
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Posts: 2,954
3/25/13 8:00 P

Hopefully cooler heads will prevail for both of them. If you could somehow get them together to talk about it in a neutral place, that would be helpful. It is about respect and the daughter has not been showing the proper respect to her father.

MARTYJOE Posts: 428
3/25/13 3:52 P

I have had my fair share of run ins with my daughter. Just remember that you should love your children unconditionally. My suggestion is to go find your daughter and half a adult conversation. You may be surprised how things sometimes work out

SHERYLDS Posts: 17,501
3/25/13 1:33 P

My sympathy to your BF
At 17 What can you do...especially if you don't condone the kids actions?
It's not as if you can watch them 24/7 or lock them up.
Like CJFITNESS supportive by his side but be careful with your suggestions.

The only thing I can think of is
always leave the 'door' open for reconciliation.

Edited by: SHERYLDS at: 3/25/2013 (13:35)
I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
3/25/13 12:56 P

Call it what you like but I call it a bad mistake. I did not judge him, I said what I feel and nothing is wrong with that. She probably left laughing and telling all her friends. Today is the first day of spring break for most school kids.

3/25/13 12:39 P

hello, I know that this is hard for both you and your BF. I have one suggestion, call the Boys Town National hotline. 1-800-448-3000. They are a great resource and they may know of a resource close to where you live that can intercede between father and daughter. It also sounds like she is grieving the fact that mom is not at home.
She may be 17, but that does not mean that she could not use some counseling


good luck.

-POLEDANCEGIRL- Posts: 14,826
3/25/13 12:32 P

I_HEART_MY_FAM - wow, quick to post/pass judgment.

To the others: THANK YOU for your positive support! I will be there to support him during this time. Give him lots of love, hugs and kisses. We will pull through this

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
3/25/13 12:15 P

Wow she runs the house. He let her pack? and gave her the okay to be gone? I don't understand her doing something so wrong and him giving her privilege's. She will just use her friends phone to text or call any friends she wants, but she won't text or call her dad. So the phone wasn't a safety line for him if he took it and then let her go at night. Now he can't call her and his 17 year old is gone all night. Hmm?????...I dont know but this sounds more reasonable me, take her phone away and make her go to her room alone without privileges. Talk with her in morning go over ground rules once again. I also think you spending the night with him is not good.

JUBILANT_SLEEP SparkPoints: (6,507)
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3/25/13 11:15 A

I'm so sorry to hear that, DYET. I don't have much experience at all with children, nor do I know anyone who has teenaged kids, but I felt compelled to offer some suggestions. I was a teenage girl not so long ago and I know how they think. I think your boyfriend should seek his daughter out. I know that the argument they had probably is causing him not to for pride reasons, but his daughter is still a minor and needs to be in his care. She left out of anger and I doubt she will refuse to return if he asks her to.

I wish him and his daughter the best.

3/25/13 11:14 A

Tread lightly. Your relationship is still relatively new so chiming with seemingly helpful suggestions may come back to haunt you later.
Support him by listening to him vent about it and only address what he has to say. If he asks you what should he do you need to becareful of your answer, maybe a generic one for now like, "Idk, but I'm sure you'll figure this out eventually"

My gf has a boat load of problems with her adult children and even we've been together for 3.5 years I still tread somewhat lightly when it comes to them.

Good Luck!

-POLEDANCEGIRL- Posts: 14,826
3/25/13 11:05 A

Last night my BF's daughter who is 17 snuck her BF in the hosue (this is the second time). When my BF got home, an hour or so later he found him. His daughter asked if he wanted her to leave and he said fine. She packed her clothes, he took her house key, phone and credit card. He is really upset! They have been each others support for years after her mom left her in a group home. This is all new to me. I really dont know what to say or do..... any suggestions?!? Im going to stay at his house tonight to be with him.

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