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_AIYANNA_ SparkPoints: (31,416)
Fitness Minutes: (26,723)
Posts: 875
11/28/12 2:12 A

Thanks you for commenting DIDS70, you are right. When we can't be inspired by ourselves, we should seek inspiration elsewhere.

I have not consumed any alcohol since Sunday and I did not switch on my computer at all yesterday. I have switched it on this morning because I have a lesson with one of my students via Skype and I have to prepare a test fro one of my classes. I resisted buying any chocolate from the supermarket on Monday and have only eaten some miniature candy that I was offered at school.

I have an ironing marathon this evening so I don't think I'll be able to work out tonight, but I'm hoping I will be able to tomorrow.

I won't lie and say that I didn't think about having a glass of wine coming home yesterday night after 10hrs of lessons, but I kept myself busy and the desire soon faded.

Here's hoping I can keep it up :)

DIDS70 Posts: 5,368
11/26/12 8:41 A

For someone like me who has been on the weightloss yo-yo, I decided that I had to forego weightloss as my motivator and doing it for myself. What i mean by that is i am not a good enough inspiration to myself to stay on course. SO I looked outside myself and my comfort zone. i don't have a husband or kids so I can't say that I want to be around for them. BUT, I do have nieces and nephews and a new one on the way (just found out and this aunty is happy). I want to be around for them, They are extremely important to me.
So maybe, just maybe, you can use your young son as inspiration and the reason to get healthy. When you want to binge eat or binge drink, think how will that affect your son if you can't run around and play with him or see him get his diploma or degree. Just something to think about.

_AIYANNA_ SparkPoints: (31,416)
Fitness Minutes: (26,723)
Posts: 875
11/26/12 1:50 A

Thank you for your comment and support WATERDIAMONDS. I know that taking small steps is the best way to achieve my goals and stick to my programme.

For this reason I have decided that I will no longer do any eating in secret. No more sneaking in a chocolate bar on the way back from the supermarket. I am also determined not to have any alcohol until Saturday when my husband and I have our "date night" and we get some takeout and watch a DVD after putting the kids to bed.

Another thing I'm struggling with is how much time I spend on the computer. I sit in front of it to check my email and then I get lost on the web and spend hours looking up "this recipe" or "that article". I was thinking that the best way to deal with that is to simply not turn it on which is now the first thing that I do when I get up in the morning.

As you can see, I'm the kind of person that tends to jump in at the deep end with most things in my life and who really needs to practice moderation in everything.

11/25/12 3:53 P

I only want to add that I understand, and completely relate to, your situation. Addiction and/or binging of any kind can be deadly, not just because of what they do to us physically, but also because they can make us believe we are complete failures.

But we can prevail. I've "gotten sober" with food over the last year and a half. Now, standing on the other side of the river, I can see how insane I was to have stayed on the crazy side for so long.

You know the feeling of health. You've been there before. So you know what I'm talking about when I say once you get clean of the junk, you'll BE--not just "feel like"--a different person. Your ability to use your common sense will flourish; your willingness to do what it takes will strengthen. And you really will WANT to do whatever you have to do to stay sane and sober.

But until you get there, the best you might be able to manage little bit each day.

That's truly all it takes. One step, one bite, one moment, one day at a time.

The very best of success to you, for yourself and for your children's sakes.

_AIYANNA_ SparkPoints: (31,416)
Fitness Minutes: (26,723)
Posts: 875
11/25/12 3:31 P

Thank you for commenting everyone

Coach Nancy, thank you for the helpful advice. I am very good at making plans, unfortunately, sticking to them is my Achilles' heel.

GREENMOUNTAIN, I give in much too easily. I know exactly what I have to do, but cannot make myself do it most of the times. I am a terrible procrastinator, as well. Nevertheless, I do not like the way I have allowed myself to become and I am really trying to find ways to change my mentality and attitude towards this.

This summer I went to the gym every afternoon for 3 months and I was more than happy to go. When September came and I had to go back to working afternoon and evenings again, I gave up completely. Any other person would have kept up a less intense workout schedule, but alas I tend to be an all or nothing person, so this why I'm back to square one again.

I do not want to kid myself and believe that I am still young and have time ahead of me to lose this weight and get myself into shape again. I may still be 36, but it seems to me that it was only yesterday that I was 20, so time does fly by and life passes quickly.

I am a mother to two wonderful children and I want to be an active part of their life for as long as I can.

Thanks again for commenting.

IJOANIE Posts: 351
11/25/12 9:32 A

I read something that has helped me and will share it here." Before we exercise self control, we must admit we have it."

I thought about this, because I often like many people just say oh well I dont have any will power.
but isn't will power the same as self control?
I have self control in some areas of my life, so why cant I exercise it in the area of food?

There may be many answers. I am just giving food for thought here.

SP_COACH_NANCY SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (112,042)
Posts: 46,222
11/25/12 9:19 A

Hi Elen,

It looks like you have put in quite some time about your situation. That is a big step in changing one's behavior.

Unlocking the door as to why we binge is probably one of the toughest parts of the journey.

First of all recognize that many times we are led to a binge because physiologically we allowed ourselves to get too hungry therefore as the old saying goes when we are exposed to food, many times "our eyes are bigger than our stomachs."

Secondly, you must really decide if you are truly hungry, or if you are eating out of stress, boredom, because you are tired or lonely, etc, etc. This is honing in on what I call, "the why we do, what we do, when we do it" scenario. This is where keeping a journal is a VERY helpful tool as it will help you see if there is a pattern with your bingeing.

Thirdly, know that when we continually deprive ourselves or make certain foods off limits, many times this draws us even more so to them. There are no 'good' foods or 'bad' foods, just choices. But if you allow yourself to occasionally have them (this is where planning is key), they no longer carry the stigma of thinking this will be it. And of course for me that meant I was less then perfect, therefore I would allow guilt to move, therefore I would abandon my plan until I was ready to try to lose weight more.

Lastly, know that you are in full control over the food. In other words, food does not have control over us unless we allow it to.

As for your exercise, you don't need to spend hours working out to achieve your goals. In fact, when people learn to integrate healthy habits into their life they get themselves off the diet merry-go-round and are able to achieve success for the long term. Just starting off with a nice 10 minute walk daily can be a huge motivator in getting you moving closer to your goals.

I hope this helps!

Coach Nancy

_AIYANNA_ SparkPoints: (31,416)
Fitness Minutes: (26,723)
Posts: 875
11/25/12 7:37 A

I have been a member of Spark People for many years. I have read countless articles on here and have felt both pride and envy while reading other people's success stories. I have acquired tremendous knowledge about healthy eating and exercise. In fact, so much so that I people are always so impressed when I give them advice about their eating and exercise habits. Not to mention my sizable collection of workout DVDs.

Despite all this, I have been gaining and losing the same 10-15 kilos for the last 6-8 years. I start an eating programme and a workout programme, I follow it religiously for a couple of weeks and then I blow it all for the next 3-4 months till the next time. I am a binge eater and drinker. My binge eating has to do mostly with sweets not actual food. My binges can be triggered by stress, boredom or just gluttony when we're talking about sweets.

I used to be pretty much underweight till I was 18. I used to be 50-55 kilos at 1.79m tall. I have ballooned to 105-110 kilos since then. I would like to get down to about 70-75 kilos. I know it's not impossible, but I lack the determination to remain consistent in my efforts.

I work as an EFL teacher here in Greece and I work all afternoons from 3 to 9:30 and 3 mornings a week, so my "me" time is rather limited since even when I'm at home, I'm with my young son. I know, though, that's there are people much busier that I am who find the time to exercise regularly.

I know that I can never go back to the size two that I was in high school, but I want to achieve my goal of being a healthy person for psychological reasons mainly. I don't want to be a victim of my impulses any more, I want to be a person who sticks to their decisions and most of all I want to be a person who can enjoy everything in moderation.

If there are any other binge eaters and drinkers out there like myself, I would more than appreciate your input. I read once that we eat ice cream sundaes not because we actually crave them but because we want our life to be like them. This couldn't be truer for me. Most of the times I drink because having a couple of beers will help me feel better about myself, that I'm a more fun person to be with. Despite knowing that all this is an illusion, I settle for this because it's easier to achieve than to actually work for what I want. I don't want to be that person any more.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

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