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BOSLUND SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (243)
Posts: 9
6/27/12 10:20 A

I don't think it matters if you know the trainer or not, it's whether or not the trainer is good. You said it was an ex-boyfriends friend, so you probably weren't best buds with him anyway. Trainers should push you to the limits without experiencing pain. Exhaustion yes, pain no. I worked with a trainer for many months, now I work for him. Having a trainer gives you that accountability and will kick start your weight loss or strength training goals. Often times our mind tells us we are done, that we can't do any more but guess what...if you are pushed, your body is not ready to be done yet, it still has more left to give...that's when you start melting fat!!! Good Luck!! If you don't go with a trainer and feel you can hold yourself accountable there are tons of resources out there to build your own workout program!!

SCTK519 Posts: 2,086
6/26/12 11:24 P

There's nothing to be embarrassed about. It will be challenging, yes; if it was easy, everyone would do it and of course there's going to be moves that are difficult, but you're getting a trainer so you can do that right and improve. If you could do the moves right now, I'd say why get a personal trainer!

LUCKYNUMBER23 SparkPoints: (12,425)
Fitness Minutes: (15,322)
Posts: 449
6/26/12 10:09 P

Are you a person that can fire a friend or tell him what you need? If you can, go for it. Is he cheap? Why do you want to go to him, instead of a stranger? Does he know what he's doing? You can always try it and tell him you don't have the money if you want to quit.

MI-ELLKAYBEE SparkPoints: (228,267)
Fitness Minutes: (210,762)
Posts: 4,388
6/26/12 8:21 P

I see that some other responses advised you against working with a trainer who is a friend or family member - but I worked happily with a friend for four months and thank God for him every day because I remain successful. We are still friends, even though I am in Illinois now and he is in Michigan. I still do what he taught me - because it works! He is a professional body builder as well as a trainer and nutritionist. He did an assessment first - and started me at a level I had to push for, but that I could meet. I could NEVER have afforded to pay what he charged at the gym he worked at; we worked out after hours in the gym in our building, after staff people left and only residents had access. He never fussed about the long, loose tops I wore, and didn't object when I refused to let him take a "before" picture. (I have NONE of those!) If you are comfortable with the person on a personal level, you will be fine with him as a trainer. If you're not already comfortable with him, think twice. But it is part of a good trainer's job to be encouraging at every step, complimenting you for what you CAN do and motivating you to go the extra mile! I'd pick a friend over a stranger every time! God bless your success on this journey we all share! emoticon emoticon

MOTIVATED@LAST Posts: 15,451
6/26/12 6:46 A


Don't get embarassed about not being able to do some exercises.

TELL THE TRAINER if you feel something is beyond your (current) limits. This is important feedback to the trainer about your current level of fitness, and any trainer worth their salt will use this information to come up with a program that better meets your needs.

And you're not there to impress the trainer. What you are there for is to improve yourself - and this is easier if you give your trainer accurate information.


ANNEV2012 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (7,854)
Posts: 974
6/25/12 6:58 P

A friend or family member is often not a good choice.

All personal trainers should be willing to show their credentials, offer testimonials and listen to you.

6/25/12 5:55 P

I would get frustrated or apologetic when I couldn't do tasks my trainer set me - until one day he laughed a little (in a nice way, not laughing at me), and said "if I'd thought you could just do it, I wouldn't have told you to try." Good training should push you to the point of failure. The point in having a trainer is to have someone to push your limits - if you can do every exercise he sets you with ease then you might as well just be doing it yourself and save your money. Trainers are there to push you beyond where you are capable of pushing yourself without external motivation. At the end of my training sessions, I usually have to sit for a few minutes and just gather myself because I'm absolutely at the point where I really can't go any more - not the point where I think I can't (that's where I stop when I'm on my own), but past that to the point where I really can't - and that's how I know I'm getting my money's worth! It feel like crap in the moment, but I feel amazing and so much better for it once I've had a shower and a protein shake.

You're supposed to fail a little bit. That's how you know you're pushing boundaries. It's nothing to be embarrassed about - it's part of the process. Next time you do it, it will be a little bit easier, and then easier the time after that, and after that, and so on, until it's easy and you've moved on to something else.

That being said, I don't know if I'd workout with a trainer with whom I had any sort of personal relationship, especially one as complicated as an ex's friend. It should be a relationship that is friendly and cordial, but purely professional without any other baggage or obligations.

6/25/12 5:47 P

I would get a trainer that you do not know. A great trainer will make sure they don't kill you the first time you come in (If they did that, you probably wouldn't want to go back).

I was really nervous about having a trainer, but it really made me stick with the exercise, and then later on she encouraged me to add more exercise without her.

DRAGONCHILDE SparkPoints: (61,458)
Fitness Minutes: (15,905)
Posts: 9,717
6/25/12 5:05 P

A good personal trainer will learn what you're capable of. The first couple of sessions will be a sort of first date for you! You'll work together to see what's good for you. It's okay not to do everything; if you simply can't, the trainer should be able to adjust for your fitness level. I' ve had the pleasure of working with a very good one a few times, and she not only knew *exactly* what I was capable of, she made me DO it.

Once they get a good idea of your capabilities, they'll then adjust your program.

I agree that you should be cautious about working with a friend.

Edited by: DRAGONCHILDE at: 6/25/2012 (17:06)
MPLANE37 SparkPoints: (79,152)
Fitness Minutes: (79,213)
Posts: 2,170
6/25/12 4:12 P

Get a trainer that you are not friends with nor a friend of a friend. Someone who is patient enough, may be a middle aged or even an older one. Explain your situation from the beginning. A good trainer may help you love the exercises which will make a huge difference in your life.

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (196,755)
Fitness Minutes: (192,153)
Posts: 15,854
6/25/12 4:10 P

Find a trainer who knows how to program design so that the exercises are appropriate to your level.

6/25/12 3:56 P

Hi, so I'm contemplating getting a personal trainer (ex-boyfriends friend) but I am worried that I am going to get embaressed if I can't do the exercises (this happened before). Any tips at all.

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