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MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,529
5/7/13 12:09 P

Whenever a cashier is acting weird I just shrug and think its not about me.

FAWNZIB SparkPoints: (10,643)
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5/6/13 11:41 P

emoticon aww Tracy! Peeps in general around the world are getting less nice to eachother. GROUP HUG GIRLS..and GUYS :P

TRACYCD SparkPoints: (5,959)
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5/6/13 11:25 P

I might be wrong but there are two possibilities that come to my mind.. One is that she felt your husband was the customer, because she assumed he was paying. Have you ever noticed women who are chauvinists? Yes, females can be just as bad as men in this regard. They fall into that from their own experiences with men in their lives and carry it forth onto other women. Big shame in that, in my opinion. The other possibility is that she was tired and upset that you didn't know what she meant off the bat about 'the card', and then decided to disregard you in a passive aggressive manner. Maybe I'm just having my own bad day, but people have been weird to me lately and everyone says I'm the nicest person they know. I'm not too sensitive either. I understand how weird that must have felt to you. She may also have been jealous of your husband.

JANIEWWJD SparkPoints: (577,063)
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5/6/13 10:44 P

She was probably just overwhelmed.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,529
5/6/13 8:01 P

I agree that you are probably reading to much into it. I have been a cashier and was distracted many times but was never jealous of the person in front of me. Or hated on them because they had a man.

LOSTLIME SparkPoints: (0)
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5/6/13 3:43 P

she probably was having a bad day. Just smile back.

MARTYJOE Posts: 428
5/6/13 2:58 P

Just smile it irritates the hell out of them

PARKERB2 SparkPoints: (0)
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5/6/13 2:57 P

She also could have been having a bad hair day. I know that's no excuse but I wouldn't dwell on it.

REJ7777 Posts: 4,027
5/6/13 2:53 P

I read somewhere about how some people leave us feeling a bit more alive after an encounter with them. That was obviously not the case here. Don't take it personally. The fact that this cashier was having a bad day is no reflection on you whatsoever!

MEGAPEEJ Posts: 732
5/6/13 2:17 P

Sometimes, there are some things, that just aren't about you.

She sounds like she was possibly distracted or just not terribly outgoing, and your example of responding "oh I thought you meant..." sounds like small talk that may not need a response from someone who isn't overly outgoing and chatty. I would think the obvious response of "no I didn't mean that" would somehow be construed as more rude.

I would chalk it up to a weird interaction, and move on.

5/6/13 2:10 P

rut-ro, Yorge!
Did you say "minimum wage"?

SIMPLYME160 SparkPoints: (1,834)
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5/6/13 2:07 P

Don't take it personally. Being a former cashier, most make minimum wage, some making ends meet by holding down two full time jobs and at their last straw for the day. Sound as if she was having a bad day and possibly missing her own husband and family.

GARDENDIVA2 Posts: 612
5/6/13 1:47 P

Whenever I encounter a salesperson like this I just turn on the charm and always leave the counter with a big smile and "have a wonderful day."

There is one store near me that it seems all the cashiers are like that. I just assume that they hate their job. Most are younger females so maybe they don't think that they should have to work. All I ask is take my money and bag my merchandise.

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
5/6/13 1:11 P

Okay, she must have thought she wished she was as beautiful as I :)

DRAGONCHILDE SparkPoints: (61,458)
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5/6/13 1:08 P

Of course not. We're not in her head. She may not have even been staring at you! Maybe she was looking beyond you. Or thought your husband was hot. Maybe she thought *you* were hot! Maybe she was spacing out.

Assume the best. If you assume the worst, you won't be disappointed.

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
5/6/13 12:55 P

Can you explain the stare down too?

ANARIE Posts: 13,192
5/6/13 12:48 P

I'm sorry, but unless there's something huge that you're not telling us, it just sounds to me like this lady has a hearing impairment. It's not at all unusual for someone to be able to hear low tones and miss higher ones, which means they can hear a man and not a woman standing right beside him. I have a cousin who was born deaf; with hearing aids he can hear men and deep-voiced women, but he and I have never been able to have a conversation without someone to interpret. He can't even tell that I'm speaking unless he's looking directly at me.

Take it easy on this woman. It makes no sense to think she was ignoring or hating on you. If she were doing that, she would have said something rude or answered with a tone. The fact that she spoke normally to your husband just means she couldn't hear you, either because your volume was lower or because she's losing her high-frequency hearing. Feel sorry for her; she probably hasn't even realized yet that she's going deaf.

GOLDEELOCKS SparkPoints: (0)
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5/6/13 10:27 A

Some ppl shouldnt work in customer service!!

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
5/6/13 10:14 A

Great replies, I am not too sensitive though, I knew there was something going on with her as far as me, and I am not worried about it. I am not going to shop somewhere else because of this either. I also worked as cashier and I never did that to anyone, I don't care what kind of day I had. I was just curious as to what her problem was. Left me with a bad feeling as I left, but was laughing in no time. I just wrote this on here because it seemed strange to me. I wasn't thinking it was my weight, I was just describing me. It was about me that is how I knew to turn around and I knew she would be watching me and sure enough she was then gave me that fake smile. Maybe I did remind her of someone she disliked but too bad, I did not know this lady, she better get her emotions in check and not take her frustrations out on others before she gets told off or fired..

DRAGONCHILDE SparkPoints: (61,458)
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5/6/13 1:30 A

I really think you're reading *way* too much into it. As a former cashier myself, I'm betting money she wasn't even thinking about *you* at all. Maybe her kid's sick, or her rent's late, or she had a fight with her husband right before work.Maybe she liked your pants, or you might have had a french fry stuck to your butt.

Maybe she was just bored and had nothing better to do than watch you walk out. Maybe there was a super hot guy outside that you didn't notice because you were obsessing over someone behind you.

Don't assume you know what's going on in someone else's head, especially regarding you. The odds are good that what's going on in their head has absolutely NOTHING to do with you.

FAWNZIB SparkPoints: (10,643)
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5/6/13 12:56 A

I worked retail when young. I think when I look back..I had bad days..some people rubbed me the wrong way BUT I was simply quiet and got the job done. It's hard to not let people get under our skin but let it go.. True she could have had some bad news she was dealing with

JO88BAKO SparkPoints: (317,320)
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5/5/13 11:08 P

Must be jealous, should have answered your question

BLUENOSE63 SparkPoints: (108,021)
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5/5/13 11:00 P

This is only my opinion but I think that you a reading a bit much into the situation. As one who worked retail many moons ago, I found that I often didn't hear what was being said due volume of voice of the speaker.

UMBILICAL Posts: 12,786
5/5/13 10:17 P

Don't try to please people.

5/5/13 10:10 P

I think you may be taking it too personally.
It MIGHT have been about your husband, or your weight, or maybe:

She's waiting to get her mammogram results, and she's scared.
Someone she loves is seriously ill, and she's scared.
Her boss just threatened to fire her over something she couldn't control.
Her car is in the shop and she just found out she can't possibly pay the bill.
The person just before you said something awful to her about her weight.

It's never nice to be treated rudely, no matter what the reason. You'd be surprised, though, how often another person's awful behavior is not about you, but is about their own personal pain. Besides, you get to go home with your amazing husband and there she is, mired in her own misery. You win.

FENWAYGIRL18 Posts: 5,868
5/5/13 9:54 P

Here's my two cents worth, I bet your husband was right! I've gotten treated like that and then the woman is gushing all over my hubby and any little thing he says they hear and laugh at and be flirty. I've gotten dirty looks before as if to say what is he doing with her? I don't think it was all in your mind or that she was just tired, I think she was probably jealous to see a full figured gal with a husband that loves her for her! But hey you and your hubby are both lucky to have one another because I'm sure your just as beautiful not only on the inside but outside too!
Just cause we have a little weight on us doesn't mean we're not beautiful, I'm sure your happy is a very happy man... emoticon

BIPPITY Posts: 984
5/5/13 9:21 P

It doesn't sound like she was hating on you. Like pp's said, she was probably just tired or something. It also doesn't sound like she was judging you because of your weight. Honestly just let this go and try not to take things so personally.

DOLLYELF SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 42
5/5/13 9:12 P

So a salesperson didn't fall all over you to be nice to you, but she wasn't overtly rude, either? Perhaps she was distracted, or confused, or having a bad day, or worried about her sick child at home, or whatever. It's really not a big deal and I have no idea why you are making it out to be one. emoticon

VATRUCKER SparkPoints: (20,629)
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5/5/13 8:38 P

Maybe I misread or do not understand what the problem was, if this is the case I am truly sorry, but I must ask if you are that sensitive, why do u shop there anyway, I go to walmart and they all but tell you they do not like you, I know why do I go to walmart? Well its one stop shopping and the groceries are cheapest in town, sometimes I will get even by shopping at another store emoticon emoticon

5/5/13 8:36 P

As someone who worked retail for years, I would like to give you the other side of the coin. Sometimes, when we are speaking with a check out person, sales person, or what have you...we say things or do things that we don't even realize would be offensive to an employee.

Now you're going to say, "But they are PAID to be NICE to me."

That's not actually correct. They are paid to take your money...and they are human. You might have done something that doesn't even occur to you to be the ONE thing that jumps on their last nerve...and you're the 15th person to do so that day. So, they snap in a very quiet way. They get smug or don't answer you or pretend to not hear you. That's how they survive. If they had to be nice all the time...if they had to be a ray of sunshine for eight hours...they would go completely insane.

Want to know what my pet peeve was? Cell phones. You have no idea how maddening it is to have someone talking on the phone while you are ringing up their purchase. Talk about rude! I started just standing there, and waiting for them to notice me before continuing with their transaction.

Remember we are ALL human. Her very bad day may have been driving her crazy, as she continued to stand there for eight hours...and you may have simply reminded her of her 5th grade teacher that she didn't like.

I_HEART_MY_FAM Posts: 1,809
5/5/13 8:28 P

She had no reason to not like me. It went like this Hubby and I at counter together paying for purchase at Home Store. She asked if he had a card. I am all about club cards so I asked her are you talking about the club card, she did not answer me. My husband then asked are you talking about a club card, and she said no a store credit card. Okay I let that one slide, thinking okay maybe she really did not hear me. . I went on to say oh I thought you meant club cards since most stores are offering those today. She said nothing, she didnt even look at me. I knew when I would walk off she would look at me so I looked back and she gave me a fake smile. I was walking to her side so she definitely was watching me walk out. I am a well mannered woman with some extra weight ( she was too) but smaller then I. I am clean, well put together. I wonder if she knows that in a long term relationship it's like we are like one so when asked a question either one of us might answer at any given time. I felt a bit hurt, but then told hubby and he said she was jealous that I had him, so we started laughing. He said she saw you with a fine looking man that she wanted lol..I have never ever been treated like that before.

Edited by: I_HEART_MY_FAM at: 5/5/2013 (20:29)
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