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LDHAWKE SparkPoints: (19,069)
Fitness Minutes: (1,818)
Posts: 771
6/5/13 6:12 P

I didn't read all the responses here because your situation is close to mine. First of all, you HAVE to get it into your head that you are NOT on a diet. You are on a program that will change your eating habits forever! Diets are short term because they deprive you of what your crave. Programs will teach you how to eat what you crave, how often you can eat it and portion control. Those teachings are meant to last you for the rest of your life. A program will also teach you how to incorporate exercise into your life on a daily basis. It doesn't have to be running a marathon or climbing a rock wall. It can be as simple as talking a brisk walk around the block.

When it comes to stop smoking, I am your current pro at that. I am currently 5 months smoke free. And I can tell you that it is not easy. Please do NOT listen to anyone who has never smoked if they try to give you advice. Here's the truth.

When you stop smoking, you WILL gain weight. Expect it and be prepared to accept it. The least amount gained will be 10 pounds, but only if you battle the urge to stuff your face with fattening things to control your urge to smoke. Do some research ahead of time to find out what you can reach for when you need to replace that cigarette you are craving. I chose Tootsie Pops and baby carrots. And I still gained 9 pounds. So what I am trying to say is expect it to happen and embrace it. My doctor told me she would rather see me 9 pounds heavier than smoking.

When you quit smoking you think life will be better. Trust me, it's not. It gets worse before it gets better. But if you understand what happens and are prepared to accept it and have a plan to deal with it (and keep your sense of humor) you can overcome.

When you quit smoking you will find that you have trouble breathing. This can last for several months. Prepare yourself and don't let that symptom do you in. Your body is cleansing itself and that's one of the steps.

Hang in there. It takes at least one year to fully recover from quitting to smoke. But it is worth it, compared to what can and may happen to you if you continue to smoke.

And the BEST piece of advice I will give you is DO NOT listen to any advice given to you by someone who has NEVER smoked in their life. They have no clue.

Hang in there. I still do and it does get easier each and every day.

DMJAKES Posts: 1,635
6/5/13 2:41 P

Areis - quitting smoking just might give you the boost you need toward a healthier lifestyle. Have you tried any of the prescription aids that are available now? I quit back in 1998 using zyban. It was just the extra "push" I needed to get over the emotional and mental hump of the first month or so. I liked that it had a defined start and stop date, based on what the doc would write a scrip for.

I would highly recommend an appointment with your doctor to discuss your options and perhaps even a physical if you haven't had one in a while. You can do this---you just can't do it all at once. One small step at a time, one bad habit replaced with a good one, one small adjustment in attitude--you'll get there eventually and you'll be able to sustain it for LIFE.

RIET69 SparkPoints: (47,087)
Fitness Minutes: (11,285)
Posts: 3,116
6/5/13 1:55 P

emoticon that includes you!!! I would agree with quitting smoking first. It is very hard but it is possible. I did it and thought I would never have any fun again. I have loved my smoke free life the last 30 years. One day I just said to myself, this is my last cigarette and I tossed the rest. That was it. I figured that I had done so many hard things in my life, why not one more that would benefit me and all those around me.. Best wishes.

-HEALTHYAMY Posts: 3,077
6/5/13 1:38 P

You definitely are not alone. I have felt like giving up many times as well. When I feel like giving up I look at Sparkpages of those that have been successful. That helps me to get back on track.

I would agree that quitting smoking is very difficult but definitely the best gift you can give yourself and your family. I think you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. Trying to change your eating and quitting smoking all at the same time puts a lot of pressure on you. Try small changes like replacing smoking with a good habit like drinking water or chewing gum. Little changes can reap big rewards over time.

Good luck to you and let us know how you are doing.

WORDWOMAN7 SparkPoints: (11,240)
Fitness Minutes: (2,874)
Posts: 154
6/5/13 12:09 P

Hi, AREIS918:

The advice everyone has posted is true and wise; I just wanted to chime in and reassure you that you are NOT alone, and you can do this! Just start small. Success at the small steps will give you momentum and confidence. Good luck!


AREIS918 SparkPoints: (349)
Fitness Minutes: (140)
Posts: 5
6/5/13 11:06 A

Hi everyone. I would like to reply to each of you individually but that would take forever. I came on this message board to vent because I was just discouraged. I did cry and I did almost give up. But.... today is a new day. Im off the pity pot. Thank you everyone for encouragement. It meant a lot to get up this morning and see so many people reply. I honestly didn't expect anything. I didn't even think people read these posts.

The only 2 things I haven't tried to quit smoking is hypnosis and acupuncture. They are next on my list. I have smoked for 25 years. I hate it. I hide it. Nobody around me smokes. My kids hate it. I am going to quit. I will post an update on that day.

So thank you again to everyone. I'm sorry I was being such a baby. Now....time for breakfast. I haven't had that in over a year. emoticon

LJS61571 SparkPoints: (3,580)
Fitness Minutes: (2,533)
Posts: 57
6/5/13 9:50 A

oh, i hope things get better for you and one important thing you need to realize is that your goal isn't perfection and you are not dieting. you are making lifestyle changes - make sure you pick ones that you can live with long term. even those small changes over a lifetime will have a great cumulative effect! you have 3 kids? do all of you have bikes? if not - get them! or tennis raquets, or hiking shoes, something you can do as a family so that you are more likely to DO IT! we are not good at tennis but we all have raquets and have a great time playing together. we hike together - it doesn't have to be a strenuous uphill hike to be good for you! get a friend involved - take zumba together. if she tries to get out of it harass her and she'll do the same for you. and realize that even when the scale doesn't move, you are still getting the benefits from all your efforts in other ways. practice makes progress, not perfect! good luck and DON"T GIVE UP!

HONEYD2 SparkPoints: (16,715)
Fitness Minutes: (8,215)
Posts: 462
6/5/13 9:21 A

I agree with everything everyone said. I have been dieting since I am 13 years old as everyone told me I was fat @ a size 12. Well they harped on me for year so I fixed them and went up, up, up. You have to do it for you no one else matters. If you guy is complaining and you have only gained 20 lbs dear God he has the problem not you.

It is hard to quit smoking and diet also, but please give up the smoking.

You can do it and like the other poster said if you really wanted to quit you would not have posted. It is the hardest thing I know, but we can do it. I am 64 years old and want to live a lot longer to see my Grands grow up.

Good luck

AMANDA660 Posts: 881
6/5/13 9:07 A

Quitting was the hardest thing I ever did. I spent a decade attempting to quit and tried everything to assist me. I was one of those closet smokers which added stress being basically sneaky because no one in my life smoked. I finally quit several years ago - I used the e-cig and it was what worked for me.
Def see your Dr. Consider a journal - it helped me discover a few patterns that would have gone un-noticed.

CMCOLE Posts: 2,667
6/5/13 7:31 A

Because it's a lifelong goal toward wellness, rather than a 'diet', you will have your ups and downs and moments of discouragement.

Continue to come back and seek encouragement.

Visit your healthcare professional and get advice and guidance

Keep up the good work, and do it for you and your health - nobody else - because then you'll be committed to YOU, and not some other unreachable goal.

AURORA629 Posts: 2,393
6/5/13 7:25 A

I never smoked in my life and never plan to start. I agree that you quitting smoking would be the best decision you could make. I know a girl at work who quit. She said it really improved her health and the money she saved from not buying cigarettes was enough for her to go to Disney. She is still slim and pretty.

As far as diet goes, I always failed at that until I took a fundamentally different approach. I stopped making it work and started making it fun. Seriously. I think the diet being fun is the only reason I am still on my diet. As far as I am concerned, there is only two reasons to go on a diet looks and health. Right now, both are a failure for me. The last few months of last year have been the WORST year of my life.

How to make a diet fun:

1. Recreate the foods you love in lighter healthier versions. You can find numerous recipes and advice on this goggling. You can make reduced calorie versions of nearly everything: pizza, pasta, sausage, burgers, fries, onion rings, oven fried chicken ect... Do that for all the foods you love and start cooking.

2. Don't give up your favorite snacks - portion control them instead. I buy chips, crackers, pretzels, small candies, cookies and redistribute them into 100 calorie servings among snack bags for small indulgences. That way it is easy to take just one bag and know exactly when to stop eating. If you love donuts, have a single munchkin instead. Look for your favorite candy bars in the just for fun sizes.

3. Any fruits or veggies you love, make it a point to have them more often. Most friuts and veggies are healthy and low on calories, so it is ok to fill up on them. For me, this means more strawberries and blueberries.

4. Don't eat any foods you don't like just because they are healthy. Any food you find boring but edible, look for low cal ways to make them more exciting. For me broccoli fits the bill. It is wonderful with a low fat cheese sauce or stir fired with lean stake and a touch of soy sauce and brown sugar. Carrots - I make a healthy and delious carrot cake, or I cook carrots in a low sugar maple glaze.

5. Every once in a while take a day off. I usually skip my diet on major holidays and at each full 10 pounds lost. Because my diet is pretty fun, I don't have a serious problem resuming it the next day.

6. As far as exercise goes realize there are pretty much countless ways to get exercise and burn off additional calories. Pick the physical activities you actually enjoy doing and make it a point to do them more often.

SKINMINA SparkPoints: (41,498)
Fitness Minutes: (13,635)
Posts: 741
6/5/13 6:00 A

I understand the overwhelmed feeling. Just don't give up. emoticon Make very small changes, like eat more fruit and vegetables. Keep healthier snacks in the house. Drink enough water. Focus on making smaller changes, instead of changing everything at one time.

Also, remember that you are succeeding as long as you are making progress on becoming healthier.....

CORTNEY-LEE SparkPoints: (67,852)
Fitness Minutes: (69,867)
Posts: 3,526
6/5/13 1:38 A

quitting smoking is HARD -- I won't deny that. I have quit a lot of addicting things in my life, but smoking was the hardest. The one thing I have learned about it is, you won't quit unless you truly want to. All the support groups, programs and prescriptions in the world won't help unless it is something you truly want to do.

My last cigarette was July 16,2009. There are some days when it is still a struggle. I have learned how to cope with those urges though, and they get fewer and further between, but sometimes they are there.

Please don't ever give up on yourself! You are worth it!!

AMYTHBE SparkPoints: (2,355)
Fitness Minutes: (1,883)
Posts: 59
6/4/13 11:53 P

Like others have suggesting, smoking is a good place to start. However, my mom has been losing weight slowly this past year and she still smokes a pack a day.... I'm not suggesting you should do that, but it is possible. Also, if you can lose the weight fairly easily, then perhaps it's a lifestyle change you need.

The number on the scale doesn't mean a thing. I'm 10 pounds heavier than I was a year ago, but my measurements are nearly the same. It just means I have more muscle mass.

Additionally, it is daunting. I've been working since I graduated high school to eat well and do more exercise. Five years later, I'm still trying to figure it all out. Don't get discouraged. Find happiness in the things you do have. Every day, try to do just a little more. I used to hate running, but I pushed myself. First, after the first 5 minutes I would be huffing and puffing, wanting to quit. But I pushed myself a little further every time I went out. Starting a healthy lifestyle takes time and effort. If you want to lose weight, you will have to reduce calorie intake. At first, when I did that I thought I was losing so much- but then I found healthy foods I really enjoy (I love salsa, beans, and sweet potato!).

So don't give up, you're the only one who is going to push yourself. And remember, you're a role model for the children. Don't forget that!

SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (253,450)
Fitness Minutes: (41,531)
Posts: 27,134
6/4/13 11:09 P

I think part of this is your mindset

"I have been on a 'diet' my entire life. "

The thing is, this isN'T a diet! It is merely a healthy lifestyle!

If you make gradual changes - slowly increasing fruit/veges and healthy protein, and decreasing processed carbs, unhealthy fats and soda/juice/alcohol (if you drink that) and get in some good exercise (and it doesn't have to be hard-out at the gym for hours, or even at the gym) then your body will start to see results. It may not be with the scales, per se, but it will be with energy, improved BP, Cholesterol and Blood Sugars, etc. Have you received help for quitting smoking? There are many ways to get that now - acupuncture, hypnosis, patches, gum and tablets are all proven choices. Of course, for it to be successful, you have to WANT to give up smoking and live the healthier lifestyle. You are the only one who can do it, and unfortunately, the only way to succeed is to take that first step WITHOUT turning to diets, and work through step-by-step to the middle, before you can reach your goal!!! It doesn't happen overnight and there will be blips on the way. Don't beat yourself up because of them - just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start again!

Good luck,

6/4/13 10:51 P

As far as smoking goes, have you tried hypnosis? I have never smoked myself (yuck!) but my mom did it for years and she dis hypnosis-has been smoke-free ever since! I think it is worth it.

You said you can't exercise like you want to-can you still go out and walk, even if it's at a slower pace? Any exercise that you can do will be helpful, whether it's a slow walk or a fast walk. Are there any exercises that you can do?

Have you thought of including your husband in your support system? Sometimes they can surprise you! Maybe if he sees that you are trying, you won't stress out so much and you will realize that he does care (I don't know your family situation so this is the assumption that I am making). I'm single, so I don't have experience with that situation.

Do you track your food? Even if you don't eat healthy, it is good to see exactly where you are at in your eating habits.

You can do it! I agree it is hard to get motivated but once you get started, you will feel better about yourself. That first step is always the hardest. You do have to do this for yourself and everything will start falling into place. Feel free to message me any time you need some help.

Also, don't think of it as a diet; think of it as a lifestyle change, which it really is. Don't beat yourself up if you miss an exercise session or eat that treat that is calling your name (as long as it isn't a whole cake!). You really can do it! Keep telling yourself that and it will happen!

SIMPLELIFE2 Posts: 707
6/4/13 2:53 P

If you really wanted to give up, you wouldn't be posting on a message board.You would just do it and walk away. You are frustrated and impatient.

First thing I would do is forget everything else a focus on quitting smoking. You could exercise and eat right, but you will *never* be really healthy until you quit smoking. There are so many programs and prescriptions out there to help so you don't have to just go cold turkey. Do some research and talk to your doctor about it to find the best solution for you and keep repeating until you nail it.

Instead of tying your life to a number on the scale, focus on real health and wellness. The process really becomes less frustrating and more successful. I wish you well on your journey.

BOLDCHANGES SparkPoints: (325)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 3
6/4/13 2:50 P

Hang in there! Many of us her feel a thought we have been on a perpetual diet. Maybe that has been the problem. I'm an instant gratification kind of girl myself, so I understand that you want to see progress and change now. For me, the number on the scale creates a sort of tunnel-vision for me, I can't see the good in anything beside that damn number. So, I had to find something else to focus on. Last week, my only measure of success was eating a healthy breakfast. That was it. I did it - and felt better and lost lbs. in the process. Try making small changes and let the success there motivate you for tomorrow...and the next day...and the next day. You can do this - please don't give up!

JEWELS571 Posts: 2,885
6/4/13 2:39 P

You are not alone, you have spark people! I quit smoking 6 years ago, best decision I ever made. Have you tried group classes like Zumba?? It can be really fun, not like exercising at all! Don't give up on yourself and I agree, visit your doctor, you may be experience depression.

MEGAPEEJ Posts: 732
6/4/13 2:36 P

The reason I like Spark so much is that it's not a typical "diet" where I have to always "try to be good". Eventually these little changes become habit and you don't have to try so much, you just know what an appropriate portion is, and that it's ok to eat a treat (as long as you don't eat ALL the treats) and that it's time for your daily walk.

If there was a way to get it today without working for it, we would ALL do that - but the work is what makes us proud when we see some success, and makes us realize we've made a healthy change for the better.

If it helps, you're not alone - we're all here too!

AREIS918 SparkPoints: (349)
Fitness Minutes: (140)
Posts: 5
6/4/13 2:28 P

I haven't seen a doctor. But maybe I should. And you are right, it has to be for me. I just don't seem to care sometimes. When I do care and I try I am able to loose and I feel good. I guess I am just tired of trying all the time. I think my problem is trying so many different things. Low carb is great for me. I can dump the pounds really fast. Then I think I will try something healthy like the spark diet and doing some exercise... I gain it all back and want to give up. The same 10 pounds come off and go back on within a week. It is really hard to change my mindset. I want it today without working for it. I think about a month from now and panic. I really wish there was somebody to do this with. I am always doing this alone.
Thank you for your response. I needed that.

BROOKESMOMMY18 SparkPoints: (507)
Fitness Minutes: (627)
Posts: 17
6/4/13 2:16 P

Have you thought about seeing a doctor they are good at helping you and you might want to get your thyriod checked that may be a reason that you can't lose and if you need anyone I am here for you... you can do it but only do it for you dont do it for your man

AREIS918 SparkPoints: (349)
Fitness Minutes: (140)
Posts: 5
6/4/13 1:59 P

I have been on a 'diet' my entire life. I give up. Just when I start feeling good I screw it all up. It doesn't help that I am married to a man who likes fit, healthy, sexy, skinny girls. I can't maintain this forever. Im getting old. I've had 3 kids. I just can't do this. I have gained 20 pounds in the last year. I don't have clothes that fit me. I just want to wear a moo moo and call it good. I don't even want to be around people right now. I just feel fat, lazy, and old. I can't stop smoking so I can't exercise like I want to. Everything is just so hard. I give up. emoticon

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