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ANARIE Posts: 13,192
1/18/14 12:11 A

This doctor herself might be the best source for finding another. Doctors aren't like hairdressers; they're not really afraid of you finding someone else. Ask her if she knows someone who specializes in menopause. If she's a GP, she can send you to an endocrinologist or a gerontologist without feeling like she's abandoning you or you're abandoning her.

Definitely try to talk to her. If you feel like she's not listening, there's a good chance she feels like you're not listening to her, either. It sounds like she's done some of the right testing-- you got a diagnosis of high cholesterol and low vitamin D, so it's not like she's not trying to find out what's wrong.

I'd personally recommend addressing the vitamin D issue first. If you're not exercising outdoors, an hour a day walking at a gentle pace would help with that *and* the cholesterol *and* the fatigue. You can get at least a little vitamin D boost even this time of year, if it's warm enough to have your face and hands uncovered.

JULIA1154 Posts: 1,783
1/17/14 11:34 P

Both LadyCJM and Nireren said everything I would have said.

I would add that Vit. D is incredibly important - do ask if you should be taking a supplement, and how much, since you've been told you're low on it.

Menopause is a good time to make a concerted effort to address any/all health concerns so that you can go through it more comfortably and confidently and approach the future as healthy and strong as you can be. Good luck!

ETHELMERZ Posts: 20,242
1/17/14 2:19 P

We recently moved from one state to another, after 30 yrs. with a family practitioner. So, I looked on the internet for doctors that take senior citizen, found a new clinic, called to be sure they took Medicare people and our insurance, and made an appt., never saw the doctor before. But he is fine, doesn't make me take stupid tests that I don't need, and keeps up with my blood work. Husband has a different doctor at the same clinic, he likes him fine, too. If we didn't like them, we would just pick someone else, but always call first to make sure about the insurance. We don't know neighbors well enough to follow their doctor references, really. But do change, if you aren't satisfied, as you get older, you need someone to help you through the muddlening through menopause years.

SLLYONS51 Posts: 3,169
1/17/14 2:11 P

Word of mouth. Don't usually like to go to Dr. that I work with

CAMEOSUN SparkPoints: (86,617)
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Posts: 10,426
1/17/14 2:08 P

I usually ask others [I trust] who their doctor is and if they like them, etc.

DROPCONE Posts: 1,592
1/16/14 12:16 P

You could also try finding out more about your current doctor. If she does not have many menopausal women in her practice, she may not be current on the best way to treat you. If you do a search for "Doctor Reviews", there are websites that host reviews of doctors. You can also search for your doctor's name and find out how she presents herself. If she presents herself as a "family physician", maybe you need someone who specializes in an older, more narrow client base.

I don't blame you for wanting to seek someone new. Your doctor shouldn't tell you "these things are issues" without actually giving you a plan of action. Are you supposed to take Vitamin D and/or calcium supplements, or are you just supposed to sit in the sun for 10 minutes a day? Do you need cholesterol meds? Do you need to see a dietitian, or have blood work because of the weight gain? I mean, really, these are things she should help you address, and the fact that she didn't is another thing that makes me think she is not a good match for you, at least not anymore.

Good luck, I hope you find a doctor that can help you!

BOB5148 SparkPoints: (523,593)
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Posts: 18,547
1/16/14 11:05 A

Whoever is taking new people

KKKAREN Posts: 12,754
1/16/14 10:59 A

unfortunately for me I have little choice. I have to go with the Doctors that are within my insurance provider plan which are very few. I agree with the poster that said medicine is becoming a very corporate thing.

JAMIRBLAZE Posts: 1,806
1/16/14 10:46 A

Medicine is increasingly corporate, complex and complicated. There is a lot of pressure on medical providers for many reasons, and your doctor may not be able to provide what you need. And even if you don't want to switch, there's never a reason not to ask for and get a second opinion.

I'll echo some of the PP's to say that I've had good luck with most of my medical providers. Why? Sometimes, luck, but mostly, I think because I've learned how to advocate for myself. I articulate ALL of my issues clearly (sometimes bringing a list), explain that I'm not looking for a quick fix drug, listen, admit when I don't understand something and ask how that can affect me. I also will bring things like my food/exercise logs, sleep log or anything else that I think may be relevant.

If the doctor doesn't let me do this or I feel like I'm being rushed, then I seek a new provider. Doctors provide a service, and there are plenty of others out there who provide the same service. Start with the doctors covered by your plan and research/ask for referrals.

ANDILH Posts: 1,543
1/16/14 10:37 A

I agree with those who have said try talking to her one more time. She should be giving you suggestions on how to deal with the issues you do have. For example...should you be taking vitamin D supplements? Or changing your diet to change other levels? Be very specific and say that you want to figure out what you need to do in order to change the issues you're having and would like her help in doing so. If the doctor isn't helpful or is just unwilling to help it's probably time to switch.
I totally lucked into my doctor...she was a recommendation from my sister's ped as someone with experience in special needs. She agreed to accept me as a patient as well. She listens to me, asks good questions, and is honest, helpful and compassionate. She's also great with my sister. However, ask around. If you have a doctor or clinician you do like ask that person for recommendations. Be sure if you get a recommendation to a doctor in a group that you actually get the doctor you're asking for. When I was switching from pediatrics to an adult doctor they pawned me off on this doctor who was awful, and they wouldn't let me switch to another or even see another if he was available. That only last a few months before I went somewhere else. Sometimes it's a crapshoot, but sometimes you can get really lucky and get someone good.
Good luck!

NIRERIN Posts: 14,275
1/16/14 9:32 A

i'm with ladycjm, ask the one you already have one last time. i find that doctors tend to speak in shorthand for things that they handle all of the time, which means that if you're not asking why, then you might not know that she is addressing your concerns. in other words, menopause tends to be a time when your metabolism slows a little more than usual. so if you're not exercising more or eating less, you should be gaining weight. and if you're tired, odds are they you're moving around less, which is exacerbating the problem. i'm not sure if d interacts with anything besides calcium, but since it's something we don't generally make enough of she may have noticed that her patients who are low in d tend to be tired, and getting enough d nearly eliminates the issue. and just like if you go in to the doctor complaining of a pain in your hip, they're not going to start doing extensive testing if you mention that you just fell down the stairs and banged it on a step. so it's possible that she feels that those three things are really important first things to get squared away. it is possible that she's blowing you off as well, but it could also be that she feels you are on the same page with her and doesn't realize that you don't feel like you're dealing with the same issues.

LEC358 SparkPoints: (11,135)
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1/16/14 8:13 A

My primary doc, my orthopedist, and the optometrist are all referrals from my dentist so I'm a big fan of asking the doctors that you see that you do like for recommendations. The medical community is pretty tight and doctors who have the same attitude towards patients and patient care tend to know each other.

1/16/14 12:18 A

I love my Doc, he's the primary for our whole family! Part of why we like him is he listens and asks questions, and takes our concerns seriously.

In a couple of cases I have asked for a referral to a specialist to deal with a specific type of problem, or to have a test done to rule out a problem. He often agrees and follows through, or will ask enough questions to suggest an alternative. I never feel rushed or anything.

UMBILICAL Posts: 12,786
1/15/14 11:30 P

How he spends time with me.

LADYCJM SparkPoints: (57,456)
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Posts: 2,545
1/15/14 11:11 P

First check with your insurance provider and get a list of approved providers.
Second, call and find out if any of them are accepting new patients with your insurance and what special interests that provider has. (For example, does she treat a lot of patients with diabetes, renal problems, obesity etc. It's nice if you can find some one who is genuinely interested in what you have)
Third, ask everyone you know if they are happy with their provider.

But, if you have been with your current doc for a while and have generally been satisfied, I would suggest making an appointment to talk to her about the concerns you have mentioned here. Tell her you do not feel like you are being heard. You might be surprised by her response. If after talking to her you are not satisfied then switch.

JIACOLO SparkPoints: (553,127)
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Posts: 30,503
1/15/14 8:45 P

Ask around....ask other medical gyno actually made a great referral after listening to me complain about how my primary wasn't listening. Ask at work, neighbors, family members. Someone must have a primary care provider they like.

KPA1B2 Posts: 785
1/15/14 8:21 P

I'm not happy with my doctor. I don't feel that she is doing enough to uncover why I'm tired and gaining weight. I'm gaining weight at the rate of about 1/2 pound to a pound a week. Her response is your cholesterol is elevated, you're entering menopause and you're low in Vitamin D.

I'm thinking about switching doctors. How do I find one that is really going to listen to me. I've usually only switched, in the past, when we've moved or our health insurance has changed. I've been with her for quite a while now and have just slowly been growing unhappy.

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