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BLUENOSE63 SparkPoints: (108,021)
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Posts: 2,954
12/12/12 2:52 P

Jeff should be fired period, end of discussion.

TURTLESDOVE Posts: 1,067
12/12/12 2:35 P

I agree!

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/12/12 2:28 P

I think it's self-righteousness, TurtlesDove...really. Who, really-doesn't have any flaws whatsoever? Those that think they do not are narcissists.

TURTLESDOVE Posts: 1,067
12/12/12 2:17 P

thanks Raptor. It kinda makes me wonder how some people were raised. Apparently, some of them have never watched an episode of "Little House on the Prairie." Charles are Caroline were prime examples of how to raise up children in the way they should go.
I firmly believe that the people that go around cutting down others are not happy with themselves and it makes them feel a little better in a weird kinda way, you know?

PARKERB2 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (68,075)
Posts: 12,065
12/12/12 2:14 P

That is one of the worst things you can say about someone.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/12/12 1:55 P

Turtlesdove...Stand up for yourself, Sweety. Tell him NOT to comment on your weight anymore, because it's really rude. Whether you lose weight, or gain weight, or stay the same-it is really none of his concern. My mother-in-law is the same way, and it drives me UP A WALL. It made me not even want to go around her for a long time. I even told my kids' father about it, and he didn't believe me until it happened again...Not even two minutes after we got there, just to say hi, she said something about me letting myself go and then saying something about Weight Watchers. That was it. I was ready to go off on her. Instead, I just asked my kids' father to talk to her. My weight is none of her business. Now-if she wanted to pay for weight watchers, it would be one thing, but she knows I can't afford it. Grrr.


CHERYLL1949 SparkPoints: (60,796)
Fitness Minutes: (9,486)
Posts: 943
12/12/12 1:48 P

I'm glad they went to the media with this. These people should be fired.

TURTLESDOVE Posts: 1,067
12/12/12 1:42 P

my husband used to work as a waiter and he said he identified his customers by what they ordered. I would have been offended, too. Although I know it's my own dang fault for being overweight, I don't need to be told something that I already know. There are things called mirrors. One of my co-workers comes from overseas twice a month to visit. He identifies me by having lost weight or gained weight. That's it! I'm thinking to myself, "geez really, I did not know I gained weight, thanks for telling me, now let me go shoot myself!"

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,527
12/12/12 1:25 P

It was extremely rude and unprofessional. Has nothing to do with whether or not these ladies need to develop a thick skin. I would especially be upset if this happened to a female family member.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 12/12/2012 (13:28)
LOVE4KITTIES Posts: 4,690
12/12/12 12:56 P

It was incredibly rude. Not only was it extremely rude to refer to the women as "fat," but it was also rude to refer to grown women as "girls." This is not how you treat people, simply because it is wrong to treat people like that. This is not how you treat customers at a business because that's not the way to get repeat business. The person who did this deserved to lose his job and anyone who knew about it and let it pass also needs to lose their job.

BASKETLADY13 Posts: 301
12/12/12 9:20 A

If the owner wants to keep business coming in the door, the staff involved should be fired. Some people are so sensitive that it doesn't matter what size they are, they are offended by this situation. You know how it is, when you have bad customer service, you tell 8-10 people and they tell 8-10 people and then it's all over the internet. Bad business. Glad they were able to take it lightly because they might find their paychecks lighter in the future after this ordeal.

ARUSHING2 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (19,755)
Posts: 720
12/12/12 9:16 A

It is assualtive and insulting.

This was NOT an isolated incident. The same and worse has been in the news repeatedly over the past number of years.

The same thing in different places with different players will continue to occur until the attention of the transgressors is gotten by the costs incurred.

VBOWX3 Posts: 20
12/12/12 9:07 A

Not fat, curvy. Let's whittle that middle ladies and keep our curves emoticon

MYUTMOST4HIM Posts: 11,453
12/12/12 9:03 A

You shouldn't label people - PERIOD!
There are more reasons than overeating for being fat. Why don't you walk a mile in an overweight persons shoes before you judge them!!! I had medical reasons for most of my overweight issues and I turned to "self medication" (over eating) when I became the subject of ridicule!!!
Health care my eye!!! I had normal blood pressure, normal thyroid, normal glucose etc... The only problem I had was I was over weight.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/12/12 6:44 A

NJAQUAHOLIC...It isn't a matter of being hurt. I knew I was huge when I went to bed last night, and I was huge when I woke up, and I'll be huge when I go back to bed. I'm working at becoming less huge, but here's the thing....HE WAS RUDE AND UNPROFESSIONAL AND THAT IS BAD FOR BUSINESS. HE WAS WRONG AND HE DESERVES TO BE REPRIMANDED.
I mentioned earlier that for me, it doesn't hurt me anymore when people, especially strangers, call me fat. I find it amusing that telling the truth is the worst insult they can muster-unimaginative morons.
The fact that you aren't seeing THAT aspect is what I find kind of weird and appalling. If he was just a customer, or some stranger off the street-it's whatever, but he is messing with the reputation of the restaurant. "Don't go to ________ restaurant. The waiters there as well as the manager have very poor customer relation skills." I mean, come on now. If I was the owner of the restaurant, I would have fired both the manager and the waiter for not upholding the standards set for them and disrespecting my customers...whether what he said was the truth or NOT!

KBRISTOW SparkPoints: (14,222)
Fitness Minutes: (6,258)
Posts: 356
12/11/12 9:17 P

AM_Morris, I kinda feel the same way, but I admire these ladies for making a stink about it. However, I think prejudices need to be exposed so folks who think you can say or do whatever you want to overweight people will be called to the carpet, so to speak. I would be horrified, yes, but I think I would cause the stink too.

AM_MORRIS87 Posts: 1,665
12/11/12 7:57 P

I mean, the restaurant employee, manager, and owner can say whatever they want to try to defend their side. Ignorance is ignorance. I mean, read some of the comments that people are posting all over the internet. All the d-bags in the world are shouting "Hey, he's just telling the truth! They are fatties!" While other people (especially here in Spark) know that it's clearly rude, disrepectful, and humiliating. However, if I were these girls I would have been so hurt and embarassed that I would NEVER have told anybody, let alone let it be seen on the news and facebook. I would be so embarassed that I would have definitely wanted to kill myself. I really mean that. My stomach hurts so bad just thinking about if that would happen to me.

Edited by: AM_MORRIS87 at: 12/11/2012 (21:35)
MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,527
12/11/12 7:03 P

You are certainly entitled to your opinion.

I was taught that "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all"


"Treat others the way you want to be treated"

Maybe I have selective memory, but it seems like we used to be a lot nicer and more respectful of people. At least if we thought something we didn't say it out loud.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,527
12/11/12 6:54 P

You are certainly entitled to your opinion.

I was taught that "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all"


"Treat others the way you want to be treated"

Maybe I have selective memory, but it seems like we used to be a lot nicer and more respectful of people. At least if we thought something we didn't say it out loud.

NJAQUAHOLIC SparkPoints: (675)
Fitness Minutes: (420)
Posts: 38
12/11/12 5:19 P

Sorry, I gotta go against the flow here but I grew up in a generation of "sticks and stones". I feel that we have molly coddled ourselves into being WAY too thin skinned. I would have been hurt but I also would have acknowledged that IT WAS THE TRUTH.

Here is how the take over of the USA is going to go: The enemy is going to come and call us all a bunch of really mean names, we'll run away crying and voila the take over is achieved.

I think its really ridiculous that there are real issues in this country that really need attention and yet this is what grabs people in the media.

I'm offended that everyone has made such a big deal out of it.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,527
12/11/12 3:46 P

If this waiter used a derogatory term for their sexual or race it would cost him his job. (as it should)

And then the manager smirking thinking it was funny is just the straw that broke the camels back.

I knew that I was overweight when I started Spark People, but my feelings would have been hurt if a restaurant server identified me as such. I already know I don't need to be told.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 12/11/2012 (15:51)
SPERRIN2012 SparkPoints: (181,188)
Fitness Minutes: (122,983)
Posts: 17,742
12/11/12 3:36 P

Fat, Skinny, short or tall, they all need loving.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/11/12 3:11 P

Society has been like that for a LONG time.
They believe that because people did MAKE themselves obese, it is okay to belittle, disrespect, demean, insult, laugh at, etc. and get away with it. Most of the time, because they DO get away with it-and it just isn't acceptable.

COSMOANGEL SparkPoints: (8,483)
Fitness Minutes: (22,712)
Posts: 52
12/11/12 3:03 P

I found this disturbing, but when I read the comments to the article at Huffington was even more disturbing - full of hate and vitreol. It was very offensive. Since when is it ok to be mean to overweight people.....the folks spewing hatred are ugly bullies, if anyone retorted with that they would be offended. What is society coming to?

KAITLYNN51 Posts: 762
12/11/12 2:39 P

I think in this day and age when we all blog, tweet and comment anonymously about everything, people don't use filters. People think they can say anything and everything about anyone with no repercussions. I believe it's led to a sense that anyone has the right to say anything about anyone no matter how hurtful or humiliating. With all the hype about the cost of obesity more and more people feel like they have the right to condemn the overweight. I think what this waiter did was disgusting and I do believe that it's discrimination. A form of discrimination that is accepted by our society.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/11/12 2:20 P

REALLY, Berry4? Have you EVER been anything more than just a little overweight? Have you ever been clinically obese?
Why shouldn't it have cost him his job? He knowingly put something on the receipt which the customers would be getting and seeing, which could be seen as nothing other than insulting and unprofessional, and in any business, that is NOT how you get repeat customers. Just because they're fat, which yeah-they are-but just because they're fat, they don't deserve respect and professional treatment? Isn't having repeat customers the goal of almost every business?
What if on your receipt it said something like "Tranny looking 'female' with big feet"...I'm NOT saying that is you, but use it as a for instance. I don't know you from a can of paint, and I don't even know what you look like, but let's just pretend that's what the cashier/waiter put on your receipt to describe you instead of putting your table number. You cannot tell me that you wouldn't want his head for that, or at least be witness to some disciplinary action. Mean is mean. Hell yeah, that jerk deserved to lose his job for being so uncouth.

BERRY4 SparkPoints: (268,373)
Fitness Minutes: (110,178)
Posts: 14,329
12/11/12 1:45 P

Not sure why "stupid" behavior is newsworthy. -- But with that said, he accurately identified the people he was serving. It shouldn't cost him his job.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/10/12 12:50 P

Honestly, it doesn't bother me as much as it used to. It just shows the uncreativity of the person attempting to be insulting.
Prrreeeettty sure I knew I was fat when I went to bed last night and got up this morning. I won't always be fat. You can't fix stupid.

TOPCAT93 SparkPoints: (9,020)
Fitness Minutes: (2,735)
Posts: 319
12/10/12 12:48 P

yes this comment is so rude and offensive-we don't go around talking crap about the size of others in everyday conversation-- I absolutely hate to be called a fat girl. emoticon

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/10/12 12:41 P

I KNOW it does! emoticon I remember going to Burger King with my dad, also as a teenager-a youngin'-and he had diabetes. He ordered a whopper meal, heavy all except mayo cut in half, medium, with a diet coke-before they had the drink station. The guy behind us commented, "Little late for that." I turned and said, "He's got diabetes." If he wasn't taller than I was and had I been braver, I would have punched him in his throat.

FIRECOM SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (11,796)
Posts: 5,855
12/10/12 12:36 P

This crap happens to men, too. Folks and it hurts just as much.

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/10/12 12:33 P

Oh, yeah. Applebees. I wish I had been there. I was an adult then. MOOOOWAHAHAHA.
----MamiSheli53's daughter, IRL.

MAMISHELI53 Posts: 16,134
12/10/12 12:29 P

NOT ONLY that...I was out with my DH once, who also had weight issues. As we were leaving to check out a CUSTOMER - who was no twiggy herself - commented just loud enough, 'SOME people don't care HOW they look." Shel

GLITTERFAIRY77 Posts: 8,023
12/10/12 11:59 A

*slams face on desk* WHAT the efffff???

LostLime is right. That kind of stuff does stay with you for a long time. When I was about 13 or 14 years old, my mother and I went out to eat at a Steak House with a buffet. I was about 5'4" and 175lbs, going through puberty-still sort of awkwardly shaped. My mother at one point got up to go to the bathroom, and the waiter came to the table and asked if he could get me a refill on my soda. With a smirk on his douchey face, he asked "Diet?" and I could hear the other waitstaff giggling. My face fell, and I said, "No. Regular." He got me the refill but it was diet anyway. I don't know why I didn't tell my mother about the incident right then and there. I know she wouldn't have let that go down. I don't care if I DID look 18. I was just a child.

LOSTLIME SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (21,430)
Posts: 19,221
12/10/12 11:33 A

This is totally out of line. Do they do this to all of their overweight clientele? I had an incident
at a restaurant when I was younger. This restaurant had white plastic foldup chairs on their
patio. When I went to sit on the chair,it collapsed on me. of course, I fell. It was so embarrassing! The waiter said that the chair collapsed because I was overweight. At the time,
I only weighed about 175. My husband was so pissed off. He told the waiter to go to hell.
He also stated that the chair had to have been broken and that they should check their
chairs and tables for damage before putting them out for people to use. Anyway, I understand
how those women felt. That stuff stays with you for a very long time.

BOBBYS1GIRL SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (2,193)
Posts: 302
12/10/12 11:12 A

Because insulting customers is a GREAT way to keep business...NOT.

There is something seriously wrong with people today.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,527
12/10/12 9:03 A

Yup it is pretty offensive.

KBRISTOW SparkPoints: (14,222)
Fitness Minutes: (6,258)
Posts: 356
12/9/12 10:44 P

OMG...... This is just as offensive had they'd been identified as any other kind of predjudiced slur YET for some pathetic reason, people still think it is really ok to treat others this way. I've been thinking so much about how I will "be" when I lose my weight. I know what it's like to feel the humiliation from someone else's joke. I KNOW that I will not look at my fellow sisters and brothers the way I used to. I will be LIVID when someone makes a fat joke or even implies one. Karma is definitely a b.......

IVYLASS SparkPoints: (223,133)
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Posts: 7,170
12/9/12 9:49 P

I think someone is going to lose their job for being stupid. Karma's a bitch.

UMBILICAL Posts: 12,786
12/9/12 9:18 P


ETHELMERZ Posts: 20,207
12/9/12 9:13 P

Most restaurants use numbers for each table, no one mentions why this isn't done at this place, so it must be the management who is at fault, in the end. Not the first time this has happened, either. Part of our current culture in America though, bullying.

CORTNEY-LEE SparkPoints: (67,852)
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Posts: 3,526
12/9/12 8:18 P

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