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PEORIAPOLE SparkPoints: (62,751)
Fitness Minutes: (132,175)
Posts: 821
1/1/12 7:35 P

Thanks for all of the replies. I guess it really comes down to my comments after adding people. As long as the comments are not out of line, everything should be ok.

I'm just not that active on social networks. I've been in a couple of forums, but I mostly lurk on them unless I have something specific to say.

I know doing this by myself didn't work out to well, so I am reaching out and trying new things.

Happy New Year!


TOBEDLAM SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (74)
Posts: 35
1/1/12 3:12 P

I think you're overthinking it but at the same time, these days it feels necessary to overthink everything in order to not offend someone. So are you wrong? Maybe not.

LPERKINS75 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (10,972)
Posts: 1,316
12/27/11 10:53 P

I agree with the poster below.

It's not creepy if it's kept professional and within the context of the site.

P.S. If a woman is offended or weirded out by a man friending her, I would imagine that her response to that would be to simply defriend you. No biggie. As long as you weren't inappropriate, so what?

Your wife is right, you're over-thinking it. However, it was a great question to ask.


12/27/11 5:25 P

Like the others have said, people aren't likely to find it creepy unless you post something inappropriate. My first reaction to being friended isn't "STALKER!!", I tend to think, "Oh, isn't that nice of him/her."

If you're still afraid of people taking you the wrong way, then try to leave comments that sound, that way, there's no room for misunderstanding.

12/9/11 2:19 P

THAT said, there ARE a lot of "creepers" here at SP and they ain't all men, either.

I think you'll mostly find that women here are generally accepting of all kinds of folks though there have been cases of guys crossing "that line" with women here as if this were a "hook-up" message board hub.

Your wife is right, don't over think, message me and I'll give you the names of all the HOT SP members who'll friend you at no cost!

MANDALORE Posts: 1,251
12/9/11 8:59 A

i have posted on everyone young old male female, I have left positive comments, and i have received from those groups too, all positive comments this is what this is about, supporting each other, if you don't make it sound creepy i'm sure you will be fine!

LARRYA5 SparkPoints: (15,320)
Fitness Minutes: (15,026)
Posts: 610
12/9/11 7:53 A

I understand exactly how you feel. An older guy like me reaching out and encouraging a woman that doesnt know me could be viewed as creepy.Especially since the site is centered health and body image,you find yourself involved in topics you probably would not bring up with a casual aquaintance. But Ive done it a few times and the response was either positive or nil. no body gave me the impression they felt creeped out, I guess they might have kept quiet about it. But I like it when others give me support and encouragement,so I feel if I want that others probably do too so I should give some back.

12/8/11 10:52 P

Positive and encouraging comments, or friend requests don't strike me as creepy. I don't know how other girls feel about it, but it wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I welcome the support and encouragement.

GOLFPRO SparkPoints: (64,533)
Fitness Minutes: (119,618)
Posts: 5,643
12/8/11 8:42 P

I'm going to lean towards your wife's rational. Don't overthink it. SparkPeople is a social networking site in it's own right. While it's different from faceebook, google+, linkedin, etc...the idea is to lean on one another for advice and support. You can't do that if you don't friend other people on the site. As long as you don't leave creepy comments you should be just fine.


PEORIAPOLE SparkPoints: (62,751)
Fitness Minutes: (132,175)
Posts: 821
12/8/11 7:58 P

Sorry if this has been discussed before.

I noticed that the majority of posters and teams are centered around women. I noticed that I have had a few people list me as a friend. I have not done this with anyone, mainly because I wonder if it will be taken as creepy. You know, that short, fat, balding guy is stalking me attitude. I don't feel that way about anyone who has friended me. Maybe it just has to do with me not being the best at social skills.

I've also been leaving comments on peoples blogs, I hope that doesn't come across as creepy either.

Anyone else feel this way? or am I just being a bit to paranoid. My wife just thinks I'm overthinking it.


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