"Treat others the way you wish to be treated" is an old school mantra. But we often say horrible negative things to ourselves. If you wouldn't say it to a loved one, then it is not acceptable to say to yourself! Be kind to yourself and when that voice steps in counter it with something positive.
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The best way to lose weight is to be kind to yourself. This means treating yourself well: eating healthy foods, exercising that wonderful body you are housed in, and taking care of yourself emotionally, spiritually and financially. It also means you should not berate yourself or beat yourself up when things aren't "perfect." Be as kind to yourself as you would be to your best friend and your own children.
I find that I get tense neck and shoulder muscles when I do cardio. The other day I noticed that when I get to that point where I just have to grin and bear it through the uncomfortable part, I look up at the ceiling. So I put a sticky note on teh spot I look at that says, "pay attention to what your body is doing!".
The instant reminder of what I am doing subconciously is just the kind of feedback I need to keep myself on track!
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