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My friend Molly lost 6 pounds eating nothing but rawhide, tennis balls, and squeaky rubber pork chops!

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What fits your busy schedule better, excercising one hour a day or being dead 24 hours a day? If inactivity is bad for you, how come trees live hundreds of years? There's war, disease, poverty, and violent crime all over the world… and your greatest concern is me not eating peas! It's the latest advancement in cardiac pacemakers. It gives you an electric shock when it detects pizza or doughnuts in your bloodstream. If I'm digging my grave with a fork and spoon, wouldn't that burn a lot of calories?
You know you are a SparkPeople member when you check your SparkMail more than you check yo ur email. I've been taking this medication for 50 years and I'm going to sue! The side effects made me wrinkled, fat and bald! Instead of jogging, can you just set my pacemaker to beat faster for 30 minutes a day while I watch TV? They should make a Skinny Channel where commercials for lettuce are just as tempting as junk food ads! Maybe you wouldn't feel so tired if you stopped thinking of this as 'cardio'.
I bought some running shoes, but all they want to do is watch TV. I want you to eat more carrots, potato chips, and crackers. Loud crunching scares away germs.

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