With family, I let them know about my goal and how good it makes me feel to accomplish the goal before we get into a situation with food. When they really care, they tend to bake my food at gatherings or offer enough variety so there are healthy options.
With friends and parties, if I have interaction with the host before hand, I tend to make a "joke" asking them to hold me responsible for what I eat. They usually laugh it off but tend not to push food on me or even if they start they catch themselves and say "Oh, you're watching what you eat."
When you make other people feel apart of your success they tend to want to help you succeed.
I keeping running in to the "But I bought it especially for you" push. I usually just say "Thanks but i don't feel like any right now. I'll just leave it here though so I can have some the next time I'm over." Generally, if its something fattening, it has already been eaten by the next time I'm there. Problem solved!
Persistent pushers get "You're nothing but a feeder!"
"NO Thank You" for he questions of another helping, or any food you do not want or need.
NO response required, just look them dead in the eye when they make snarky remarks like putting meat on your bones,etc.
If somebody put food on my plate without my asking for it, I would set the plate down and walk away. As far as drinks, I would request ice water. If they push booze or anything elese,, just keep asking for water. If they insist, ask for a glass, walk to the sink and fill the glass. I did this at my best friend's alcoholic boyfriend's party, he insisted I drink alcohol, shoved a huge glass of liquor in my hand when I walked through the door(I never met him before),,I repeatedly asked for a glass of ice water.. When he handed me the glass of booze, I walked to the sink and dumped it all down the drain, asked for a clean glass and poured myself a glass of water. He avoided me like the plague,, Fortunately, she dumped him..
I am an adult, I know what and how much I wish to consume, I do not need an insecure person plying me with what THEY like or want.
All of these responses are just too nice. Just tell the food pusher, "Back off freak!"... haha. Why do we always feel we have to be nice to people who are being inconsiderate, mindless or intentionally cruel? "No" is another good answer as well as "I'm sure it's very nice but I don't want it."
5/16/2012 3:43:20 AM
My mother-in-law to be is a cake and cookie pusher!!! Every single time we are at their's we have a coffee and my fiancee always has a piece of homemade cake. I always say "No thank you. I will like it and want it all the time". Seems to have worked (took a couple months of repeating it.)
5/9/2012 3:20:46 PM
At Easter I made a healthy Easter meal and my mom brought over a chocolate chip, chocolate cake. I did not say anything, but gave a look that could kill. My very supportive son said, "I recognize that look. I get it when I have done something wrong. There is no need for time-out or any yelling. The look alone sends cold chills down my spine." It was awesome and my mom knew she had crossed a line. My point, it is helpful to surround yourself with people who are supportive when in social situations so it is not just you fighting the battle alone.
I see nothing wrong if someone wants to give you leftovers. Heck, take them, put it in your trunk so you are not tempted to eat while driving home, and then if you don't want them, dump them. I figure they gave it to you as a "gift" so you can do anything you want with it. There's a difference between people who are trying to be helpful and givinig, and people who are deliberately trying to sabotage your efforts. I mean really, leave poor grandma alone. She probably doesn't have that long to live, and if she thinks she is being helpful, let her keep her delusions and figure out how not to hurt her feelings, while not consuming large amounts of food.
And, to tell you the truth, I think most of us can take a taste of someone's special dish, and then move on. Really, if you can't control yourself in front of people, you're probably worse by yourself.
I have gained a ton of weight, but none of it was due to people pushing food on me. It was all the eating I did by myself, alone, in my house. Let's put the blame where it belongs.
I finally got tough with an office food pusher. She actually took my plate and put another huge piece of icing-laden cake on it and gave it back to me while I was in a conversation with onther co-worker. I nonchalantly edged my way over to the trash while still engaged in coversation and tipped the cake right in! I mean, everyone in the office knew I was in the worker WW program - this woman just could not get it after several polite "no thank yous".
1/6/2012 3:45:39 AM
I have food allergies, two of which I discovered within the last four years. If someone tries to push me to try a food I have no interest eating in, I tell them: "Sorry mate, already tried one new food, I need to make sure if I have an allergic reaction, what exactly I have a reaction to." It's not a lie, and being that there are more chances for me to develop allergies to other foods, it's a legit reason. It's the whole reason I can't eat shrimp anymore :(
As for alcohol, I take prescription medication that gets messed with if I drink too much alcohol - and thankfully most of my family is smart enough to understand SSRI + Lots of Vodka = Dead.
So I have an easy out. But the "No thanks, I'm a bit full." usually cuts it for most people. If not you can be passive-aggressive back, but that's not a good idea, your other option then is to say "I'm pacing myself so I can have some more later, small meals metabolize faster than a large meal."
At dessert time this Christmas, my grandmother asked my cousin what he wanted. He said, "Anything that doesn't have sugar in it." "Here. Have some salad," my grandmother responded. To which I quickly observed: "It's JELLO salad!! The Jello has sugar in it! The marshmallows have sugar in it! The maraschino cherries have sugar in them! How is THAT sugar free??" I think food pushers just have no clue.
12/21/2011 9:27:04 AM
Take some home in a "doggie bag." The pusher will be delighted and won't know that you never ate it!
i totally defend the small white lies to avoid offending people... my mom is one of the best food pushers ever, and just saying no thanks doesn't work, she will be offended and still continue.... on the other hand, a brief 'thanks, i had a big breakfast' or 'thanks, i can't drink too much, i took an aspirin earlier' works all the time.....
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