What's up? Interesting question on a lot of levels. One way to look at it is, "Does the fact that you're working on getting healthy, losing weight necessarily change your role with your friends? Does it have to? Are we in short predestined for roles in life and are you, by pursuing this course, rebelling against a natural order of things?
To answer your title question, you should be at a place in your life where you are comfortable with yourself. Now that might mean that you should be the fat friend, but I would suggest, just by your presence on this site, that you might want more than to be the sidekick sometimes. Does your fat really define you?
Deciding to lose weight and in essence change your body composition is a lot more than reshaping the body. It is a mental and emotional overhaul as well. How you arrive at this decision is just as actually doing the work that follows. You'll find that if you're doing this for you (And yeah that sounds selfish on the surface but follow me here) that people will understand it and most will accept it.
I was the fat friend in college. I was 280 and decided to lose weight. One of the women in our group of friend labelled me the big brother (Translation permanent sidekick). After about 6 months, I was down to 230, not thin by any standards but for the first time in a long time, I looked good. I was still a good friend to go clubbing in Tijuana with or go out and talk to. I was still the big brother of the group but losing that weight allowed me to bust that mold and have my own times in the spotlight. You don't have to lose what made you a good friend when you lose the weight? If you were a funny guy, who listens and has a good time with people while you are fat, you can do that when you're losing weight. Hell, that part doesn't weigh anything. You don't have to be the fat friend, but being the friend throughout is cool.
Anyway, I hope that helps,
Russ
LOCKWOOD44 7/13/06 10:40 A
I have come to realize that I don't know how to define myself other than the fat friend. I have really athletic friends and have come to think of my self almost as thier sidekick. Does anyone else feel like this? Like not only are you changing who you are but are unsure of how people will percive you after the change?
