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MISSMYFIGURE
4/2/06 3:08 P
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| That is one of the things that we are a bit concerned with as well. I love the innocence of our children. We homeschool and don't have the influences of what goes on in the public school system. I appreciate all the advice I can get.
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I would also say, make sure your kids can handle the influences you are bringing into your home. When we brought our kids in, I had a brother who was 14, who was pretty innocent. My mom was frustrated, because our boys talked about things that my brother didn't need to hear.
Make sure your kids feel comfortable talking to you about everything, because so many kids in the fostercare program have had life experiences that are horrible, and they will talk about it with your kids.
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MISSMYFIGURE
3/30/06 8:59 A
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| I think that is one of our concerns with having other kids in the home...though I have had multiple kids from our old neighborhood come over to stay multiple nights (single mom needed a break). I treated each the same. I know we need more positive influences in our society so I hope I can plant seeds into their lives that will grow something positive
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Make sure that your kids know that they are still important. I know that sounds wierd, but when we had foster brothers/sisters, we were mostly forgotten. Not by our parents, who were doing the best they could with 4 of their own plus up to 4 foster kids, but by teachers, relatives, etc. There were times that we were made to feel less important because we were not abused/neglected/abandoned. It hurt. Just make sure you take a little extra time to let your kids know you love them.
Also, remember that losing a foster child you have had for a while can be really hard on your kids. When my first foster brother, who we had had for almost 2 years, went back to his mom, I didn't understand, I thought he was my brother. To this day, I remember him screaming, "Mommy, don't let them take me. I'll be good." I had just turned 4.
Anyway, foster parenting can be a wonderful thing. Good for you for deciding to open your home.
Amber
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My husband and i were foster parents for 12 yrs. Short term, long term and emergenct care. We adopted one of the foster children we had living with us at the time. He was a special needs child. We were in the process of adopting a 3 yr old,actually had out court date set, when the mother came back into the picture. She had never seen him before. Gave him up as a baby and no contact for 3 yrs. She didn't want him then at 3 yrs old but wanted her mom to take him. Because of circumstances, we were given rights to keep contact with him and have visitation on holidays and summer. It never happened. They moved and we never could locate them.
There have been good points and bad points to the fostercare system. Good times and bad times. Hate to say it, but good kids and bad kids...Ask me about the bad ones if you really want to know. They all most made a tv show out of it. And we were in the newspapers 3 times. It can be a very rewarding experience though. But you have to take the good with the bad. 
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MISSMYFIGURE
3/29/06 9:52 A
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| I have four presently. We are on the final stages of being licensed. Probably will be by the end of the month. I think we are going to start with Emergency Foster Care.
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My parents became foster parents when I was 2. It was interesting, to say the least. My grandparents were foster parents too, I have aunts that I don't know if they are actually blood related or not!
May I ask if you have kids of your own?
Amber
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| I have 2 boys who we fostered and finally adopted one after 3 years and one after 5. It is very rewarding to watch them progress in a safe environment, but it is an emotional roller coaster. I never have fostered a child I had to give back, but I almost lost both of my boys in the same month after having them for a couple of years. The hardest thing for me was feeling like they would not have been going to a safe environment. Like I said, it is very rewarding to watch them grow, and they do grow and change a lot, but it is also an emotionally draining experience at times. Good Luck.
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| My hubby and I were proctor parents for a while. (Proctor parents give more structure, and its generally shorter term than foster parents.) We loved all of our boys, and most of them did well after they left our house.
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MISSMYFIGURE
3/28/06 9:29 A
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| My husband and I have recently went through our classes to become foster parents. Eventually we plan on adopting in the future as well. I am quite excited yet nervous about this new endeavour. Let me know some of your stories please.
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