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HOWARD.MOORE
4/16/06 12:03 A
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I recommed the book "Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey. My wife and I started using his plan in 2003 when we were expecting our daughter and after she left work in 2004, it was difficult, but as of today we have one credit card left to pay for and then our house. The budget is the key, but his philosophy is: Survival items (food, shelter, then bills, then fun stuff) and have an emergency fund. Sounds hokie, but it works.
Dave's motto: Live like no one else, and later you can LIVE like no one else.
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| My first suggestion is create and live by a budget. It sounds easy, but many people have no idea where they spend money. (starbucks=fourbucks) My husband and I both have learned a ton from the book by Ron Blue "Taming the Money Monster." I went from being an engineer to a mom, which definately cut our income, but it is well worth it. I am the one to teach our daughter values, morals, and beliefs. That to me is priceless. You may also want to look into a home based business because you can write many things off for tax purposes as well as supplement your income. I hope that helps.
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Heather - this comment "I wouldn't have given up these last 2 1/2 years for all the money in the world."
Sums it up very nicely!! I could not agree more.
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HEALTHIER2008
4/7/06 3:47 P
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I've been a SAHM since I got married. Originally it was because I couldn't find work where we lived and then because I had my son and there were many complications. He'll be 3 this summer and we're doing okay.
I completely agree with what others have said. Also, with gas prices, consider where you live in relation to how far you have to travel. How far is it to DH's work? The nearest decent grocery store? Etc. Sometimes a slight increase in rent will pay off in the gas department. Also, I often walk to local veggie and fruit markets. The produce is fresher and cheaper than in the store AND I get the benefit of walking!
Being a coupon addict is a good thing too. Keep a notebook on prices of things when you first start. Find out what is cheaper at which stores. That way you get the most bang for your buck with those coupons. If you're military, USE the commissary. It's not a great deal on everything, but it's incredibly useful on many products.
Try to find low cost things to do as a family in your area. Instead of going to a matinee at the movies, go to the park for a picnic. Pack lunches. The kids will have fun and memories and so will you. My husband dusted off his old fishing tackle and we've taken it up as a family hobby. It's fun for all of us and when we have a good day, we get higher quality fish than you'll find in any market.
I hope you enjoy the time you get to spend with your children. I wouldn't have given up these last 2 1/2 years for all the money in the world.
Heather
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I am new here. But I thought this was an interesting topic. I had never thought of "how to afford" to be a SAHM. What a insight. I have been a SAHM since being 5 weeks pg. lol. (Long story on that one.) But we have managed for almost 11 years. I guess you just start thinking what is most important. We have always in all the time we were married (13 years) had 1 car. Don't do a lot of extras. There was a few times we went to no cable. Basic phone line. No credit cards.
But don't get me wrong. We do go places, do things, eat out (there is my big down fall on my weight .. we eat out more we eat home), son attends private school, etc ..
Just don't have the BIG fancy houses (only 1,100 sq. ft). Fancy Cars never. First brand new car I owned was the one I am driving now (2004). Just started out small and grew.
I think had I ever been a working person, we would have a hard time going down to 1 income. But since this is all we've ever knew. Just fits.
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I have only been doing this sahm thing for a year but I agree with the ladies here. I know which stores have the best prices on items I need. One of the stores offers double coupons (I'm a coupon junkie) and I try to save my coupons for when the item is on sale if I don't need it right away. I also buy alot of generic which can be a challenge when you have school age kids. They don't want to take generic to school or kids will make fun. I buy my generic or store brand then package it myself into snack size bags for snacks or lunches at school. Most stuff you can't tell the difference when it is not in a package. We also have no debt except the mortgage and 1 vehicle. We don't buy stuff unless we can pay cash. We live in the boonies and I try to only go to town once a week to do errands and only grocery shop every 2 weeks. I try to do as much as possible when I go to conserve gas. We go out about once a month and on special occasions. Remember...just because it is on sale doesn't mean it is a good deal. If you don't need it you will just waste your money. My clothes mostly come from consignment shops (most still have tags). My kids clothes come from sale racks but we also have 2 grandmas that can't help buying.
Sorry this is so long. I just feel making a few sacrifices here and there is really worth it. I am currently trying to find something to do from home so if anyone has any suggestions. I just want some money to pay for entertainment stuff (I and my one son bowl once a week in a league). I do some ebay and I have sold quite a few used things that we out grew or didn't need anymore. My mom and I also have 2 garage sales every year and include friends and family to join. We do all the work and we take a portion of what they sell to help pay for the ad. My mom's place is on a main road so we have it there. By including others to bring their stuff, we get the ad paid for and can advertise more stuff and get more people to come. We like to do it. Last year between our 2 sales I made $400 and we sell our stuff cheap. We price to sell not to make money but end up doing both. The items we have left we call a local church mission and donate it to them. They run several women's abuse shelters.
I worked FT as a claim processor in insurance until my office closed a year ago. I made 2/3 of our income. We now live on 1/3 of our income so it hasn't been easy but it has been wonderful. My hubby lost his career job to downsizing about 4 years ago and that is how I came to making more than him. He now works FT and PT trying to find another job in his career field.
It is a FT job for me making it work but it is very gratifying when I look at my boys 12 & 2 1/2.
I hope all these posts make it easy to decide. Use your head and put it down on paper, then go with your heart.
Chele 
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BLESSEDMAMAOF2
3/24/06 12:12 P
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| I've been a SAHM for 8 years and I love it. It was hard for the first few years because DH made less money but now he makes about $30,000 more a year so we're able to live comfortably. I also sell Avon but only make a couple of hundred a month from that right now. Our first priority is to pay our bills, buy groceries and any other necessities we need at the time. We always make sure we put money into savings each week so we have extra money if we need it for emergencies. I always look for sales and clearance racks. My kids wear nice, name brand clothes and shoes but I don't buy them unless they're on sale. The cheaper the better, IMO. I do alot of my grocery shopping at my local Save A Lot store and I love Walmart and JC Penney's. Ebay is also a great place to shop for clothing because you can get good deals on all the name brands. Anyone can be a SAHM, you've just got to learn to budget and realize that there are things you can live without.
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MISSMYFIGURE
3/24/06 9:55 A
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| A BIG thing that should be gotten rid of is the credit card debt if you have any. Keep one for emergencies (or for hotel/car reservations should they later be needed). It's amazing how much money is wasted on just paying the minimum on those. Vehicle payments is another big chunk. An older reliable vehicle will save you lots instead of paying high vehicle payments. I do what a lot of these other ladies do...shop at inexpensive clothing stores (Old Navy, Walmart, JC Penney mainly in the clearance aisles). I also shop at a discount grocery store (cheaper than Walmart). It's about seeing which items are necessity and which aren't.
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POLKADOT*FLOWER
3/24/06 8:45 A
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Oh my I love this topic! I am a SAHM. We have 14 children ( 10 still at home). My husband is an RN, so we make good money but not a lot!! I used to be an RN too, so when I became a SAHM our income went down by HALF! The ladies on here sound like me- we do a lot of the same things.
Ihave learned where to shop in my area to get the best prices. I go to Sams right when the door opens- the meat is marked down from the day before. I buy it and freeze it. If you go late in the day it is all gone. I do most of my shopping at Sams, Walmart, and Food Lion.
I agree with LADYBUG. Pay bills first. Get rid of as many of those as you can too. Learn to be happy with less. Most magazine subscriptions are worthless- they cost you money and parade things in front of you to make you want to buy more junk. Look around your home. Are there things you could have done without? By not buying those things you are BUYING time with your kids!
I need to scat right now. I will try to pop back in and add more later. God bless you! It can be done!! Hugs, Barbara
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BUFFALOGAL95
3/23/06 4:55 P
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| I was a SAHM for 5 years and now that my kids are in school, I work part time. Staying home with my kids was a WONDERFUL experience. I did do some babysitting the last year I stayed home, but that was more of a favor to friends, and payed for our vacation. My tips for staying home are this. BUDGET, BUDGET, BUDGET, first thing. You need to know where every little penny goes. My husband and I didn't sell off everything we own, live on beans or welfare, we just lived conservatively. Still do. I spend about 300 a month on groceries, cleaning supplies, paper products, etc. I am able to do this because I make a list, use coupons, price comp, and buy store brands and bargains. My family doesn't wear expensive clothes, or go to the movies or out to eat much, but we aren't deprived. For fun go to places that cost next to nothing or free, the park and library story time are great places. Anyway, you can afford to stay home just consider it a work in progress and don't sweat the small stuff. You will eventually work out the kinks and enjoy the wonderful opportunity you have been given.
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AUGGIE1DOGGIE
3/23/06 10:48 A
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| Hmmm maybe I'm one. Sounds more like being poor which I am. LOL Oh I get it now - stay at home mom! You people are wonderful. Sorry for the joke I didn't really understand. I think that has got to be the hardest job in the world. it should be a 6 figure job in my opinion!!
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GODDESSANGEL
3/23/06 10:45 A
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| I buy alot of reduced meats and then just freeze them and fix them later. I always check the reduced racks too. I have bought a bunch of toys for my kids for Christmas next year on clearance too. I also check the sales ads for the groc. stores near me and I will make a list out from them and take them to my Wal-Mart and comp them for the lower price in the ad. Too save on the electric bills I have tried to keep the heat to one setting and open the blinds during the day to let the natural light in. I have went from using Tide for washing clothes to using Sun laundry soap. I also use alot of coupons too. I might be only 10 cents but that is 10 cents more in my pocket. Also check the store brands out. There are a few things that I won't buy store brands, but that is why the coupons come in check.
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NETLOCMOMMA
3/23/06 9:45 A
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The biggest thing to being a SAHM...downsize.
Do you need 2 cars? Do you need a huge house or large expensive apartment? How often do you eat out or need name brand things? Even buying prepackaged foods adds up.
13 years ago I was too sick with my first pregnancy to work. My husband made 6.25 an hour and never was paid overtime. We made it. We didn't qualify for any type of state aid other than for the medical insurance.
We are now a military family. It is difficult to pay for all the things that we need to pay for...but we do it. Again, we don't buy unnecessary things. We may go out to eat once a month.
SAHMing can be done.
Other things that you can look at are also working less than part time...a few hours here and there when hubby is home to watch the kids.
Good luck in your decision!
Darcy
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Over here we simply waited to have children until DH made enough so that I could stay home. We met when we were 18 & 19 and our daughter wasn't born til we were 28 & 29, and we'd moved into a house and lived in it for 4-5 years.
The biggest bill we have is the mortgage, and that takes up 19% of our income.
Our next biggest bill is the two car payments on our cars, and that's 12.5% of our income. Our savings + allowances is about the same -- 12%.
My goal as far as budgeting goes is finish paying the house and then live off 1/3 of our income, bank another 1/3 long term savings for retirement and the kid's college, and then bank 1/3 for short term savings to help with things like emergency repairs, new appliances, vacation, etc.
Consider non-toxic cleaning. _Clean & Green_ by Annie Berthold-Bond is a good place to start and once you realize you don't need so many different products to clean with, you slash your grocery bill considerably.
DH and I both have "allowances" that go into our own personal checking acounts. Then the rest goes into the house checking account. So as soon as a check comes we deposit it. 6% into savings, 6% into the allowances, and then the rest in the house account.
He buys whatever he wants, I buy whatever I want, and if we go out to eat or similar it is understood one or the other has to treat because "entertainment" costs do not come from the household expense account.
HTH!
Veganmom
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LADYBUGK03
3/22/06 10:13 P
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Stinkpot,
I have been a sahm for almost 3 1/2 years some of which I was pregnant but anyhoo. My advice would be for you is to pay bills first, buy food and then what you have left save a little if not possible then buy what you need like clothes shoes etc. Paying bills and buying foods first is your main priority. I usally write my bills on the calander and then budget my money. I can see what is coming up and what I can do spend extra. It's been hard but we manage. If we can't afford we don't need it. I also buy a lot of clearance things. That's the first thing I look at. As a mom you need lots of things. Sad to say but if I need something it usually goes on the back burner. I take care of my kids and husbands needs first. I just recently went to a kids outlet store. They had lots of things. I also shop at walmart. I am not a mall shopper. Sometimes I will hit Jcpenney when they have sales otherwise I don't buy anything full price. The shoes for the kiddos hello they don't need to be 45 dollars. Walmart and payless work just the same. With the food I buy in bulk. If I see something on sale I buy two or more. My can foods I buy 3 or 4 for a dollar. I just watch my spending. I am a huge Walmart shopper. They have low prices. I would say just make a list at each beginning of the month and go from there. Just remember people will get their money sometime. Your family comes first. Hope this helps.
Jennifer
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| I am not a sahm but years ago when I was married to my practice husband I was. He made a decent but not fantastic income. We got rid of my car. We cut the cable and pruned our phone service down to basic. I took in one child around my daughters age to babysit. That payed for my groceries every week. The idiot made enough to cover the rest. There was not alot of extras that is for sure, but we made it work and it was SOOOOO worth it.
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| I just can't seem to find it in the budget and my husband makes good money. Any ideas?
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